'AITA for not letting my nephew use my camper van so he can have his own room?' UPDATED
"AITA for not letting my nephew use my camper to have his own room?"
My sister and her husband fell on hard times. They went from renting a nice house to having to rent a room from a friend. It was supposed to be temporary, but they've been in his house for an entire year. And he didn't have more than one room to spare to rent to them. I have a family of my own, and my house is full. So I didn't want them living with me.
But I have a vintage camper trailer in my back yard. One of those small ones they called a Canned Ham type. It's had various repairs over the years, including redoing the floor and ceiling, as well as getting a new axle. And it's in pretty decent condition for being over 50 years old. I take this camper on yearly trips with friends, and on camping trips with my family. And I'm very anal about it's upkeep.
My sister though has asked to borrow the camper numerous times to put in her friend's back yard so her teenage son could have some privacy and use it as a personal bedroom. But I know my nephew. He's destructive with everything, and would turn my camper into a total mess. And I'm certain they wouldn't want to give it back whenever I need it because he'd already be living in it.
I know they can't simply go out and get a camper of their own because ones in usable condition are not cheap. And right now they are trying to save every extra dime to get back on their own feet.
Recently my sister has gotten our parents involved. And they think I should just lend them the camper. But I've still refused. They won't let up and seem to think that if they keep hounding me as a collective, that I'll give in. But I haven't. My wife is on my side, and has refused to let my sister and brother in law in when I wasn't home. They have a vehicle that can tow the camper.
So I don't trust them not to take it if they can get in my back yard. My house also has cameras, and my sister and BIL are aware of them now. They say I'm TA because I only use the camper a few times a year, and they need it now. But I worry that they wouldn't want to give it back, much less return it in the same condition.
I firmly believe I'm in the right. But with my parents and sister constantly breathing down my neck, I thought I'd come here for an unbiased opinion. AITA for not lending them the camper?
Info: I did suggest they get my nephew a tent. But they shot that idea down and called a tent temporary. If anything that just felt like another red flag to me.
Our parents do not live close anymore. They moved several states away to retire a few years ago.
Update:
I showed my sister and BIL this post after getting the verdict. My parents have seen it as well. They are all very unhappy with me. But my parents have backed off and say they won't bother me with it again. I also spoke with my sister alone, and went through the rough estimates of what possible repairs to the camper would be, should my nephew damage it.
My sister was not happy to see those numbers. Then I called her out on how they'd likely not want to return the camper when I need it, but they also tried to come to my house when I wasn't home to take it without permission. And I told her I'd have no problem calling police if they ever try that. My sister still tried to say her son needs the camper. But when I went through the comments on this post with her.
She became incredibly embarrassed and then got very angry. She left saying she won't bother me for the camper anymore. But still stated she thinks I'm a jerk. I didn't reply because I knew she was waiting to gaslight me. Just waved her goodbye and she left.
My BIL called me shortly after to yell at me. But he had no leg to stand on other than they want it. I told him I'd contribute $100 for a tent. But they're on their own for the rest. They actually agreed to the $100. So I guess my nephew is getting a tent to live in. I'd like to thank everyone here for all their great advice. You gave me what I needed to end this problem.