'AITA for not making my daughter-in-law coffee and telling her I am not a barista?'
"AITA for not making my DIL coffee and telling her I am not a barista?"
My son and dil ( Emily) are staying in our home probably for the next month due to water damage in there home. The company is fixing the damage but the flooring was damaged so it’s not very livable right now.
They have only been here less than a week and I am having an issue. I work nights I come back home around 6:30 am and then go to bed. My husband is usually up so I make him a coffee/ breakfast before I turn in. Just something like to do, more quality time before he heads to work. I asked my son and Emily if they would also like coffee or breakfast before they go to work.
They said no to food but yes to coffee. That was easy and I just made two extra cups. I asked them to tell me if they want me to change how to make their coffee. I thought they would just tell me, use this cream or if they had a preference on blend. Emily texted me last night and said she left instructions for the coffee.
This morning I came home to very detail instructions how to make a complex coffee. It was like a Starbucks drink, she wanted foamed milk on top, different syrups, a specific coffee bean ( ground fresh…) and a different brewing method ( we have a drip coffee machine) most of the stuff was one the counter.
I decided I wasn’t doing that and just made the normal coffee. Emily wasn’t happy and we got into a argument before she went to work I basically told her I am not a Starbucks barista and I am not going all that. She told me I shouldn’t have offered in the first place if I wouldn’t make the coffee to her liking. We left on a sour note.
I have been getting texts from my son about not being hospitable so I am having trouble sleeping at the moment. Should I just make the coffee? AITA?
This is what people had to say to OP:
stroppo said:
If your son's doubling down like that, sounds like it's time for he and his entitled wife to seek new accomodations.
SoccerProblem3547 said:
Yep, they can have fun dealing with their insurance and get put into a hotel room ( if op wants to do this)
From my experience it sucks so much, so OP you were really doing them a favor.
OP responded:
I don’t believe this is a kick out offense, I already sent them the post So I will not kick them out, maybe if the situation get worse. So we will have a conversation when everyone is back from work.
PompousTart said:
Frankly, if you are being kind enough to put them up in your house, both of them should be making the coffee! You're hosts, not staff.
OP responded:
That’s doesn’t make much sense because I need to go to bed. Also much more of an enegry drink person for night shifts. I don’t mind making people coffee when I get back, this request was just too much.
lihzee said:
NTA. I can't imagine being so entitled. You're making her coffee, you're just not devoting a ton of extra time to make her some sort of fancy drink. If it's that important to her, she should get up earlier and do it herself. "I have been getting texts from my son about not being hospitable." Or maybe your son can get up earlier to role play as a barista for his spoiled wife.
Cevanne46 said:
Wtf. If someone asks you how you like your coffee your options are milk/no milk, sugar/no sugar, strong/weak/middling and maybe can I have a big cup. And if the person making you coffee just finished a night shift? AND they are putting you up for free? NTA but they are so much so
GalacticCmdr said:
NTA. Damn she is entitled as hell. Just say you have made a pot and she can bedazzle it up herself.
angelaelle said:
NTA. The social contract for asking someone how they like their coffee goes like this: black or milk? How much? Sugar or not? Maybe if you have different milk options. That is it. Your DIL should be embarrassed for asking you to make such a ridiculous drink.