'AITA for not feeling bad for my wife when she mangled her hand using a gift I told her was dangerous?'

"AITA for not showing more sympathy for my wife when she mangled her hand using a gift from her mother that I told her was dangerous?"

My wife will not ever refuse a gift from her mom. And once she accepts it she will be sure to use it. This has never been a problem before. I don't give a shit about how our front yard is infested with gnomes and other ceramic crap. I don't care that we have decorative spoons from around the world.

I do care that my mother-in-law gave us a double edged serrated bread knife. I saw a new handle in our knife block so I took it out to look at it. It looked dangerous. I tried cutting some sourdough with it and almost cut myself.

I told my wife it was dangerous and we should just put it away. She insisted it was fine and left it. Whatever. I went and told both our kids not to use it. It took five days. My wife was cutting a bagel with the wonder knife and she cut the web between her thumb and forefinger. Deep enough she cut that big tendon too.

I heard her screaming and ran to help. I wrapped her hand in clean paper towel and then kitchen towels. We only live few blocks from a hospital so I didn't call 911. I had our son drive us there while I kept her hand elevated and put pressure on it.

She has to have surgery on it. I NEVER ONCE SAID I TOLD YOU SO. I also, apparently was not as sympathetic as I could have been. I don't know what else I could have done. I held her hand the whole time. At the hospital I did all the talking while she got admitted. I did not leave her side until we got home.

She said she could feel my judgement. I don't know what that means.

I did throw the knife away though.

Can anyone please explain what I did wrong?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Ebenizer_splooge wrote:

I agree the knife sounds like a cut waiting to happen, but the specific way she was cut sounds like she would have done it with a normal knife too.

Cutting that part of your hand while slicing a bagel means she was probably holding the bagel in a burger grip as she cut it instead of holding it flat on the counter and cutting sideways with her palm on top of it.

Top-Bit85 wrote:

Of course she could feel your judgement. You warned her about something that was obviously dangerous and she stubbornly and stupidly did it anyway. She was wrong and knows it.

Not saying I told you so is positively saintly.

Bear_Caulk wrote:

Sounds like your whole household should take a course on basic knife skills if everyone's cutting themselves on a bread knife lol. I get it's got two sharp sides but there's no scenario where your hand should be under the the blade or pressing down on the back of a bread knife blade anyways if you're using it properly so there's something more going on here than it being 100% the fault of a knife.

coffeebugtravels wrote:

Oh man! My mom did that exact same thing to her hand about 30 years ago. The doctor that stitched her up said that specific cut in that specific area (regardless of how it occurs) is called a "Bagel Cut" in the medical community.

(In the 80's/90's when bagels became more mainstream this injury began showing up in Emergency Rooms all over the country in large enough numbers that the medical community gave it an unofficial name.)

You're NTA. She's not actually mad at you. She's really embarrassed (she probably had to explain how she injured herself multiple times, to multiple people while in the Emergency Department, each time causing further embarrassment).

So not only did she hurt herself in a way that could have been avoided, but an item her mom gave her was the instrument of injury. She's probably more angry at her mom, but you're an easier target.

whoaitsmarsh wrote:

The way you wrote this makes it seem like...you don't actually like your wife very much. You seem annoyed by her personality (ceramic crap, spoons you don't give crap about) and general demeanor. I say mostly NTA, but if my husband was saying this sort of stuff about me with that tone - I'd feel judged in general, not just in that moment.

viewdifficult2428 wrote:

Please explain to me how the knife being double edged made her cut through a bagel and into her own hand? Wasn't she simply too eager / cutting too fast, and the 2nd cutting edge on the knife had nothing to do with it?

Like...sure, that knife is more dangerous than a regular one. And that's a great reason not to use it. But we all agree that she cut herself because she didn't pay enough attention to what she was doing, right?

Miserableviolinist32 wrote:

She just knows you were right and she’s projecting. I doubt she stays mad at you.

OP responded:

I hope so.

Amethyystfire wrote:

NTA.

Sometimes the looming "I told you so" is worse than just saying the words and getting it out there, between you two.

She's in a bad mood because 1) her hand hurts, probably a lot, 2) she knows she screwed up, 3) she now knows you're right (if she didn't before), and 4) is waiting for you to gloat and hit her with the "I told you so". Even if you never intend to do that, in her head you probably already have.