Couple considers canceling Christmas after being 'robbed' of Thanksgiving leftovers. AITA?
"AITA for not wanting to host Christmas after the family stole all the Thanksgiving leftovers?"
merrymenopause
My husband and I hosted the family for Thanksgiving. We made 2 turkeys, a ham, 20 lbs of mashed potatoes, 2 pans of dressing, sweet potato casserole…the full Thanksgiving menu. My in-laws always bring a ton of desserts, trays of cookies, pies, rolls, etc. which helps so much.
We had a lovely evening, good food, good drink, good company. Later in the evening, when people were packing up to go, my husband had bought some plastic leftover containers for this moment and said help yourselves to some leftovers.
We then went back into the front room to continue socializing. I was pretty tired and put my feet up, until it came time to walk everyone out. I looked into the kitchen and saw that the food on the island and the table was put away and went to bed.
The next morning I woke up starving, dreaming of turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy. I opened the fridge and stood there in shock - it was empty except for a bag of turkey wings and half a bag of dressing.
I thought there had to be some mistake and went to check the fridge in the garage. Nothing there evening. I sat in shock, trying to comprehend what had happened to all of that food.
When my husband walked into the kitchen, I asked him if there had been some miscommunication - did he offer the left over food to our relative’s charity organization?
He said that he had not, but he had observed another relative and his entire family carrying out the food that they had brought, unopened dessert that the in-laws had brought, in addition to gallon ziplock bags of the food that we had made. Did I mention I had made 20 lbs of mashed potatoes?!?
It was a pleasure to make a meal for us to share together and I welcomed a reasonable amount of left overs, but to literally rob your host and take everything is out of bounds in my book. Now I don’t want to host Christmas because of this greedy behavior. AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
Lovebug-1055
Do not host Christmas. Just say “sorry we spent so much on Thanksgiving and when everyone took all the leftovers, leaving us nothing, I had to go out and buy food for us which used up my food budget for the month. Merry Christmas”.
SnarkyBeanBroth
Name and shame, too, if it wasn't "everyone" - if Aunt Marge and Cousin Fred took reasonable amounts, but Uncle Howard & his family were the real culprits, make sure to say "... and when Uncle Howard and his family took all the leftovers, leaving us nothing, ...".
Don't spread the blame, unless it's warranted. You don't want Aunt Marge feeling weird about her perfectly normal tupperware of food.
Suitable_Instruction
My sister and I sneak “are there any mashed potatoes left mom?” Every holiday - in front of my clue/classless sister in law (who took ALL THE potatoes and gravy) seven years ago - and then hysterically cackle (which we know is awful) - but we take it a step further; we’ve made mashed potatoe ornaments, gifted each other boxes of instant potatoes - 😂🤣😂
Neat_Caregiver_2212
They took EVERYTHING THEY TOOK THE ROAST BEAST!
Zestyclose_Public_47
Why didn't your husband say anything when he saw them taking the food?
merrymenopause
He said he saw them walk out to their car with the unopened desserts that my in-laws had brought. He thought it was tacky, but didn’t want to spoil the evening by calling them out. He didn’t know that they had cleaned out the turkey, mashed potatoes and sides until the next morning.
Emotional-Hair-1607
The unspoken rule with leftovers is that you get first dibs on what your brought. Then everyone can take as much as they could normally eat for one meal. After that if there is still lots of food left, the hosts offer more to anyone who wants more. One person can't take all of the turkey for themselves. Looking at you SIL Abby, everyone saw you stuff all of the white meat into your tupperware.
repairmanjack2023
NTA. Sounds like one of those Chevy Chase National Lampoon Vacation movies.
Laugh it off, and don't invite them again.
Jmfroggie
I’d send out a message and say to whoever so rudely took ALL the leftovers, YOU should host the next holiday meal! Or shame them through a group text. You spent the money on the food and the time cooking the food- it belongs to you. They stole from you by taking everything.
There is never an excuse to take all the leftovers without checking with the host- you take SOME, or ask how much. And you NEVER EVER take unopened dishes another guest brought!
adventuresofcoal
Are our families related? I had family members take ALL the leftover food from my mother’s funeral. It was for my brothers and our kids. Relatives from my deceased father’s side took everything, even took food out of my refrigerator.
manik_502
NTA. I think is very general knowledge that if a host offers you some leftovers, you take a portion, maybe two xd. It is basic etiquette that you leave food for the hosts, unless explicitly indicated by them. If there aren't that many portions left, you don't take any. It's as simple as that.