'AITA for now keeping secrets from my grandma?' 'She ruined the gender reveal.'

"AITA for now keeping secrets from my grandma because she ruined the gender reveal?"

My husband and I are almost thirty and about to have our first baby in December. This is after multiple miscarriages and adoptions falling through. I have been telling my close family all the details from the beginning incase I lose this baby as well.

I wanted to wait to announce to the world, but my grandmother kept pestering me about just letting her tell everyone since she's "so excited." It made her visibly distraught when I told her I wanted to announce to the world on my own terms.
When I finally announced to our church she was upset I hadn't allowed her to do it earlier because I'm "already getting big enough to notice."

Now, we found out the gender last week and I told her this morning I wanted to wait to announce to the world. I didn't want a gender reveal party, but I still wanted to be able to tell everyone on my own terms.

She didn't care for my answer and told everyone in our church (we have a VERY small town/community) the gender this morning when I wasn't around. Church members just began walking to me saying congratulations on baby's gender! My sister saw I was obviously distraught and told my grandma to stop telling people which upset her more.

Now I feel I can no longer share information about my baby without her going behind my back and telling everyone every little detail. My father says I am overreacting because "this baby is all she has."

She already has three other great grandchildren she was nothing to do with. AITA for not wanting her involved in my progress anymore? I just want information released when I'm comfortable to.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Adorable_Click9074 said:

NTA. "She already has three other great grandchildren she was nothing to do with." She does not give a crap about you or your child. All she cares about is being the center of attention.

thechaoticstorm said:

NTA. She can't be trusted to keep a secret. It doesn't matter if she's excited or not - it's your baby and not hers. Also with a history of losses, that's a delicate subject and she needs to keep her mouth shut. Sorry Dad but you're wrong. What your mom or MIL is doing is incredibly disrespectful. (I bet she's his mother.)

magiemaddi said:

NTA, but don't be naive and learn the lesson already! Stop telling her things you want to announce yourself.

midcen-mod1018 said:

NTA. Grandma gets to know info when everyone else does, and your dad is probably going to get put on that list as well.

Niccon43 said:

NTA for wanting to share your own news, but you need to stop telling granny info you don't want others to know yet.

ani-dani said:

NTA. No one, no matter their relation to you or the baby, is entitled to information about your baby. Share what information you are comfortable with, in the timeframe you are comfortable. Congrats on the little one!