"AITA for not having my parents at my wedding ceremony?"
I (F29) had a small wedding ceremony on Halloween and had a party the day after, I didn’t want my parents at the ceremony, but invited them to the party. They are divorced, and have done nothing but bring stress to my life for many years.
My mom has also said and done some very hateful things, including choosing multiple men over me and my brother, and also running off and getting married to one of those men. Who she has since divorced. (I’ve also stupidly gotten married at 18 and had a huge wedding which both parents were at.
Which didn’t last long, shocker I know.) It was out of state from where I’m originally from. My father didn’t come at all. My aunt insisted on bringing my mother, and they came a day before the ceremony was supposed to be, I never told them where the ceremony was.
I invited some very close friends and my brother to the ceremony and my now husband‘s (M28) immediate family was there along with his best friend. At the party my aunt made a passive aggressive comment to me about not being told where the ceremony was.
I love my Aunt, and I would have loved for her to be at the ceremony, but my family likes to push my mom on me. So, she made her choice and I made mine. Am I the ahole?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
lemon_charlie said:
NTA. You have boundaries regarding your mother and your aunt doesn't respect them. Simple as that. You had the wedding on your terms rather than by the expectations of anyone who wasn't you or your new husband.
lemon_charlie said:
NTA. You have boundaries regarding your mother and your aunt doesn't respect them. Simple as that. You had the wedding on your terms rather than by the expectations of anyone who wasn't you or your new husband.
Jerseygirl2468 said:
NTA and at some point just tell her "I would have loved to have you there, but I know you would have brought my mom, and I didn't want that."
BellaSquared said:
NTA. You'd think your aunt is old enough to understand actions have consequences.
SarcasticPups said:
NTA. Have your parents genuinely apologized for your forgiveness and tried to earn back your trust? If not, they don't get to be a part of your big milestones. I'd say the same to your aunt, now that she's shown she cannot be trusted either. Congratulations on your marriage!
Wedjat_Eye said:
NTA. Though I wonder what your reasoning was in inviting your parents to the party at all. Sounds like there’s a high possibility they would have ruined it if they were both there.