"AITA for telling two old ladies to eat at home?"
I was eating at a chain breakfast diner with my friend today. The restaurant wasn't super busy, but it was maybe half full. My friend and I get seated in a new row in the booth behind two old ladies. Right as we sit down, even before the waitress comes to take our orders, these old ladies began complaining to each other about our volume, and how I'm leaning too much on the booth seat and making it wobble.
Fine, I sit slumped forward. It's the least I can do and it's not that hard an ask. I don't think I am being very loud, just talking regularly as opposed to a whisper since, you know, it's a diner. Not a black tie steak house.
The waitress takes our orders, and my friend and I began talking about work, about games, just chatting. On and on these ladies are complaining over to each other, we're too loud, we shouldn't be talking at such volume in public, don't kids (we're in our 30s) know about volume and politeness in public.
Their waitress comes over and they say everything is good, then talk about how they should ask to be moved, how the food is taking too long, why won't we stop talking while we're eating. It's been maybe 30 minutes nonstop of them complaining.
But they never turn around to ask us anything, they never mention anything to the waitress, just saying how rude some young people, men and women are, how we can't behave in public and be ashamed of ourselves.
Another 30 minutes go by and we get our check first, pay, and stick around to talk more. It's fun being in a diner and chilling with my friend, we don't see each other often. These old ladies get MAD we don't leave after paying and how dare we stay to keep being so loud.
They get their check, their waitress asks if they need anything else, they say no and get up to leave. I stand up, introduce myself to them, and let them know I didn't appreciate being insulted through my entire meal and if they wanted some where quite to next time ask to be move, ask us to be quiet, or go home.
Of course they just say if we want to be loud to go home, and I say that we were being loud, it's fine to have conversations in public, and it's incredibly rude to talk about the person you're sitting right behind and insult them for an hour. I tell them good bye and just sit back down.
My friend thinks I was in the right, since they also felt we weren't being loud. The waitress and restaurant workers were confused because they hadn't noticed anything and also thought we weren't being loud. I am really just here to see if it was appropriate for me to tell them to eat at home if they wanted a private quiet meal next time, or if that's a social blunder. Was I the ahole here?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
live-fast-eat-trash said:
NTA. They put on a performance but you gave an ovation worthy closing act. Kudos to you.
Mater_daemonum said:
I had a similar encounter a few years ago. You were nicer than I was tho. After about 10 minutes of this couple complaining because me and my brother dared to talk around them I told them if they did not like it to either leave or turn their hearing aids off.
the_ct_muncher said:
NTA, if you could hear them, then by their logic they were too loud.
Character-Taro-5016 said:
NTA. They didn't have anything interesting to talk about and you guys provided two gossipy old hags with material for the kind of conversation they enjoy, looking down on other people.
justwannaseesumthing said:
NTA. The whole point of eating out is the socializing aspect. Did they expect you to eat in silence. You should have said something to them sooner. Maybe they need a lesson in etiquette themselves.
EmilyAnne1170 said:
NTA. After the part about kids not knowing how to behave in public, I would’ve been tempted to ask them as politely as humanly possible if they wouldn’t mind quieting down because I was trying to hear my friend talking, not them.