Owner of ten horses sends teen sister vet bill after she tried to breed new stallion. AITA? 'She was CRYING.'

"AITA for sending my little sister a vet bill after she tried to get my horses to breed?"

I (33F) am a Horse Breeder and own ten horses. I have a little sister (19F) who was a surprise baby for my parents, they didn't think they could have more after me so she is quite babied even now. They begged me to take her on to help her get some work and I agreed but made it clear she'd have to work hard and there would be no slacking.

She has generally been fine with it and enjoys being around the horses though I do have to light a fire under her arse at times to get her to keep working. The problem however arose when a local animal rescue asked me to help them, they had a Stallion surrendered to them and they didn't have the capabilities to take care of him, I had room so agreed to take him.

I've also arranged a full genetic testing on him to ensure he's alright as it seems like he was gotten through backyard breeders. I've also made an appointment to have him gelded as I don't know enough about him to risk him not being gelded. He has his own paddock and is kept in a separate stable than my own horses just to be safe. I'm slowly socializing him but i'm taking no risks.

I've been letting my sister sit in on my breeding planning for 2025 and my main stars are going to be Dante and Willow. They've had four successful and healthy foals who are going to go into Dressage. I know they work well together and Willow has had a two year break so she'll be ready to go again this year.

The first warning bell I overlooked was that my sister asked about the new Stallion and when I'd be breeding him. I explained he'd not be bred as there was too many unknowns, I don't know his health and I don't have a good enough grasp of his temperament.

She protested that he was pretty though, prettier than Dante, and I explained there was more to this than looks. I thought she'd understood and didn't think further on this. Yesterday an emergency came up and I had to leave my sister alone for an hour. I told her to she could take an hour break.

When I came back I found to my horror she'd put Willow into the Paddock with the new Stallion. I asked her what she was doing and she told me she just thought they'd work well together and she was doing me a favor.

I got Willow out of there but not before the new Stallion bucked and reared quite a bit from stress. I got Willow out of there then set about calming him down. I told my sister to get home and not come back. Shouting at her quite a bit.

I then had a vet come out and check them both fully to ensure they'd not hurt each other. My one relief is Willow isn't in estrus yet. I had the bill sent to my sister at my parents' house.

My parents called me today in a panic asking what the heck this was, when I explained they told me I was being unfair and she didn't understand, that she couldn't pay this and was being cruel and my sister was crying.

I told them she did understand she just didn't care, that she could pay or they could pay but I wasn't. They are freaking out over how they'll afford this. Am I taking it too far?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

alsotheabyss said:

Horse owner, absolutely NTA. WHAT THE F WAS SHE THINKING. He could have killed your mare! Bet she wouldn’t like that bill, or the lost income afterwards.

dasbarr said:

So I'm not super educated about horses. But couldn't either/both the horses have been hurt to the point where they would have to be put down? Your sister is a danger to have around them. And your parents need to understand that if she doesn't know to not try and breed horses without the permission of their caretaker that's your parents fault. NTA.

gingrbreadandrevenge said:

NTA. Veterinarian here. I also run a rescue for draft horses out of our small farm and come from a long line of horse breeders and have a strong Equestrian background. This was monumentally disrespectful and potentially harmful to your horses.

Regardless of if you had a planned breeding or not, you were correct to keep the new stallion separated until you knew what's what. Horses have so many communicable viral and bacterial diseases they can spread to each other. And you were right not to want to risk your other horses.

Not to mention, he could have severely injured your mare. Your sister needs to learn to listen when she is told "no" and not to do things just because she thinks it would be "cute." I would be upset about it as well (I'm actually secondhand upset for you!), and her having to deal with the consequences of her actions is right.

Your parents' reaction is EXACTLY why your younger sister feels like she can get away with whatever she likes and then boo-hoo and claim ignorance. Let them know that if they keep coddling her, the next call might be from the police when she does something even worse because, for her, there seems to be no ramifications for her behavior.

RattusRattus said:

NTA. Realistically, how much money would you be out if this breeding had been successful? While I wouldn't expect them to pay the bill, you can tell them sis isn't coming back to work until it's paid.

Lily_Flowrs said:

NTA, your parents saying “she didn’t understand” is treating her like she’s 5. She’s an adult by legal standards and she’s been around the horses now for a bit so she most likely completely understands what she did, she just didn’t give an eff and did what she wanted. Happy nothing happened to either horse but yeah your sister needs a reality check.

lovinglifeatmyage said:

Ex horse owner here. Please tell us your not having your sister work in your yard again, she’s an absolute menace by the sounds of it. And yes, she should be paying the vet bill. Hopefully that will make her realize what she did. NTA.