When a young professional bought their parent's house at market value, it was a win-win situation: no bidding war, and keeping the wealth in the family. It was a perfect arrangement... until the parents decided to come back.
AITA (Am I the as*hole) because I kicked my parents out of the house they sold me?
My parents retired five years ago and moved back to South America. I bought the house we lived in because it is in a mature neighborhood with massive trees and a huge yard. I paid market rate and I have a mortgage. The only advantage I got is that I didn't get into a bidding war. I asked them how much they wanted and I paid it.
It is an older house built in 1956. It is a very large bungalow style house. I have spent the last couple of years turning the basement into a rental suite so I could pay off my mortgage faster and later on have a place for my kid, when I have them, can learn to be independent when they are old enough.
Well my parents decided to be big shots back home and blew through 20% of all their money in five years. They were giving gifts and loans they weren't asking for payments on, and supporting a bunch of relatives.
It is their money and I have no right to tell them how to spend it. They both have pensions and investments that mean that they aren't going to be poor or anything. They just can't keep living like they are if they want to act rich.
So they moved back here to Canada. They asked me if they could move in with me for a while. I said yes because I love my folks. I can afford to not rent it out. So I got the suite ready for them.
I picked them up at the airport and took them home. When I opened the back door and led them to the basement they acted all surprised. I thought they were impressed with my upgrades. I showed them the kitchen and bathroom I put in, and the two bedrooms.
A couple of days later they approached me and said they were embarrassed to be living in the basement and they couldn't have their friends over because of that. Since I am single and it's just me and my cats why don't I move into the basement and let them have their old home and furniture back. They would be willing to pay me rent.
I said not. That's my area now. I paid for it. They started getting all mad and said that they could have gotten more for the house if they hadn't sold it to me.
I invited them to leave and go elsewhere. They never fully unpacked so it was easy. I drove them over to my aunts house and now they are calling me constantly because they only have one room there. It is a huge house and it is just the three of them but my aunt won't let them use the guest suite. It is for when my cousins or her mom visit which is quite often.
Now my siblings and parents and family are calling me and begging or ordering me to take them back. I don't think I should have to after being disrespected in my house. AITA?
Reddit rules a pretty unaminous NTA (Not the as*hole) and gave plenty of reasons why:
NTA. When they sold you the house at market price there were no strings attached. You were kind enough to let them live rent free in the basement, which should have been fine since this was only supposed to be temporary. I guarantee you if you moved into the basement and let them take the main part of the house they'd never move out, then guilt you into paying little to no rent.
They're family, but don't let them take advantage of you because of their lack of responsibility with money. Your family is only pressuring you to take them because THEY don't want to house or deal with them.
NTA. It’s really hard not to suspect your parents always planned on having the option to move back into ‘their’ house. If they have enough money to offer to pay you rent for the house, then they have enough to rent a nice place from someone else. I think they would be horrid tenants for your rental suite if you let them back.
NTA. If they wanted more money for the house they should have set a higher asking price. You didn’t refuse to let them stay with you and you essentially offered them the privacy of an apartment. As far as I’m concerned they’re ungrateful assholes and they can deal with the fallout from that on their own.
And hard_tyrant_dinosaur shows no mercy:
NTA. I love their line of: 'they could have gotten more for the house if they hadn't sold it to me.' Hhhhhmmmmm... maybe yes... but... They still would have blown through their money just as quickly, if not faster. They might have gone another year or two before they hit that 'oh bleep' moment, but they still would have hit it.
They would have probably still ended up with your aunt. Because you wouldn't be in your now house so they couldn't have gone there. And even if you were in a house, not an apartment, it would have been less likely to have the same space that the house you're in now has.
They had a good thing and threw it away. Multiple good things. They seem very ego driven and desperate to be seen as cock-of-the-walk. A few years living in a single bedroom on your aunt's sufferance will do them good. If you haven't gotten a new renter for the basement suite yet, do so asap. That will solve the 'let them back' cries. Can't do it if you don't have room.
And if you do let them back in the future, treat them as renters just like any other. Signed contract, charging full rent, everything. It will help them keep in mind that it is not their house.
While it's important to honor thy parents, maybe the parents should also honor their agreements.