I was hosting a movie night and thought I'd play "Hereditary" for the Halloween spirit of it all. I invited maybe ten people, made a funny little invitation graphic for my scary movie night, and I was clear about what movie would be played to everyone. One of my friends heard that I was having a movie night and texted me asking why I didn't invite her.
I told her that I knew she didn't like horror/scary movies and that I didn't invite her because I knew she wouldn't be interested. She can't watch scary movies whatsoever because they trigger her.
She told me she was upset that she wasn't included. I told she that she was welcome to come anyways if she was okay with the movie being played, and if not, that there'd be other movie nights.
The movie night came up this past Saturday. I arranged a whole bunch of food myself, setting up a cheeseboard, making my own special chocolate-covered popcorn, cooking food, and securing desserts.
I arranged wine and soda. My friend showed up 40 minutes late with frozen Totino's pizza rolls, and she brought some guy she had just met on Tinder that she didn't ask about or mention bringing.
She asked me to make her the pizza rolls, ignored the food I made, and poured herself a big glass of wine which she drank very quickly. Then she poured herself another big glass and downed it.
We put the movie on, and at the beheading scene, she started freaking out and panicking. She was crying hysterically and everyone including me was super worried about her. She locked herself in my bedroom and refused to let anyone come in for the duration of the movie, including her Tinder date.
She insisted we finish the movie without her. So we did, letting her stay in my room to calm down and try to self-regulate. I could tell that everyone was confused and worried, including her date.
After, when everyone left, it was just me and her. She let me into my bedroom and she'd made a nest for herself in my bed out of all my blankets. She told me she was mad at me because I didn't change what movie I was showing to be more inclusive of her, and that she was expecting me to put something else on.
I told her that I never said I would change the movie, and that I have movie nights all the time and that lots of my friends love horror movies, and that I personally love horror movies, and that she doesn't have to come to every single movie night. I said to her that she knew that the movie would bother her and that she came anyways, and that her actions are her own responsibility.
She said that I was being mean and excluding her by showing a scary movie. I said that she's not the only person on the planet and that sometimes I'm going to want to do things that she doesn't like. She called her Tinder date to come back and pick her up. He did and she left and now we haven't talked since then. AITA?
CuriousTsukihime said:
NTA - the fact that she locked herself in your room for not getting special treatment after basically inviting herself over and bringing a plus one is reason enough to let this friendship go. 15/10 guarantee she googled the movie, knew what it was about, and came anyway. This is the dummest power play I’ve ever seen. You’re better off without her. Happy spooky season btw!
SpiritedAwhale said:
Hard NTA, you communicated perfectly, she’s just whinny and entitled and drunk and weak-headed. The movie is awesome too. Tell her to host her own movie nights so everyone can watch Paw Patrol and The Lizzie McGuire Movie, the more appropriate ficks for her annoying persuasion.
OverexuberantPuppy said:
I might be reading way too much into this, but is it possible she has a thing for you? This reads to me as a (very childish) attempt at seeing if you like her. Do they get jealous that I brought a date? Do they cook for me and serve my preferred dinner? Do they try to comfort me when I am upset? Will they change the movie when I show up? When I get upset? NTA.
ndicatprincess said:
NTA. She was upset she wasn't included, so she ruined everyone else's time. POV: I'm easily triggered by some horror movies because I can't do all the bones. I don't watch....I leave the room often. Or I don't come.
conswithcarlosd said:
NTA. She expects the world to bend to her and that's not realistic. You gave her more than advanced warning as to what the theme of the party was and what movie would be. She forced herself over was rude during the entire visit, made the entire party about her and then has the nerve to be upset. She's toxic and if I were you I'd consider no longer being her friend.
dunks615 said:
NTA. She’s wilding and self victimizing at this point. I would just cut contact with her because she demonstrated how self centered and demanding she is.
adubs117 said:
NTA. Main Character Syndrome strikes again.