Pregnant woman plants to tell sister the baby name, 'my husband asked me not to.' AITA?

"WIBTA if I told my sister my baby name after my husband asked me not to?"

I 36F am expecting my 1st child, a daughter, with my husband 37M in 5 weeks. We have not told anyone what we planned to name our daughter. This was at my request. I have 3 older siblings, and currently 11 nephews/nieces.

My mother, when my brother and his wife were expecting the first grandchild of the family, gave us all advice not to tell anyone our child's name until they were born so no one would offer opinions on it and try to talk us out of the name the parents had chosen.

All my siblings have followed this advice and after some debate my husband and I decided too as well. Well, 4 weeks ago my sister gave birth to her twins (her 4th and 5th child) and named them Mary Elizabeth and Katherine Joanna.

The girls are named after our 2 grandmothers and my BIL's two grandmothers. Problem is Katherine was also my husband's and mine's daughter's name. Originally, my husband and I were trying to come up with a new name for our daughter, however other than the original name announcement my sister my BIL have been referring to her as K.J.

Since my husband and I want to call our daughter Katherine and not shorten it, we are now strongly considering keeping the name Katherine. I told my husband that before I would be comfortable doing so, I would want to run it past my sister and only my sister.

He was originally not thrilled with keeping the name a secret, but he is completely against this. We have not been able to come up with a different name we both like. So, I am considering talking to my sister without telling my husband. WIBTA if I told my sister my baby name after my husband asked me not to?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Specialist-Owl2660 said:

YTA if you did without your husband being on board. You pushed him into the tradition and now you want to renege. Although to be honest just talk to him more. I'm sure he'll see the logic in your wording.

Shichimi88 said:

Yta. Don’t go behind your husband’s back.

journeyintopressure said:

YWBTA. Talk to your husband about what you want to discuss with your sister and see if you can reach an agreement. Also try to look at new names together. However, if you don't find a name you both like, you can simply name her Katherine too. Or use it as her middle name.

LindonLilBlueBalls said:

YTA if you go behind your husband's back. You are the one that made him keep quiet on the names and now you want him to keep quiet still while you break that agreement. What do you want to get from your sister in this situation? You want her to green light the name and leave your husband out of the decision? Do you think she will remain quiet to all your family when you tell her the name you picked out?

canyonemoon said:

YTA if you do anything without talking to your husband first. You're married, you love each other, you're expecting a child together very, very soon; if you can't talk to him about these concerns, I don't know who you could talk to.

jeffprop said:

YTA. Ask your husband if he has a problem with you asking your sister for her opinion on sharing a name, but not saying what the name is. That way, you know if your sister will be upset and still keep the name a secret.

Emperor_Atlas said:

YTA - I will never, ever understand this boring obsession with needing to name children after other family members. There's infinite names, choose anything else, it's not difficult.