'AITA for putting my husband’s grill back into the garage after he ignored my ultimatum?'

"AITA for putting my husband’s grill back into the garage after he ignored my ultimatum?"

So I (38F) have been married to my husband (40M) for almost 17 years. We’ve got five kids (our oldest is in high school, the youngest is in 5th grade) and a golden retriever who thinks he’s still a puppy. We live in the suburbs, which means yes, we have a decently sized backyard. But let me tell you, a “big backyard” doesn’t mean it’s infinite space, and my husband treats it like it’s his personal showroom.

He is obsessed with his gadgets. Inside the house? He’s got speakers in practically every corner—kitchen, living room, bedrooms, even outside. If he could, I swear he’d rig up a surround-sound system in the laundry room. I’ve tolerated this DJ lifestyle because honestly, it makes him happy, and I figured picking my battles was healthier.

But the issue started with The Grill. And I’m not talking about a little two-burner thing you drag out in the summer. This is his “master cooker grill”—the Cadillac of grills. It’s huge. Takes up a chunk of the patio like it’s a permanent resident. I’m half-convinced it has its own gravitational pull.

At first, I was like, “Fine, whatever, grilling season, he’s enjoying it.” But we’re about to hit December. Thanksgiving is next month, it’s cold, and the grill hasn’t been touched in weeks. It’s just sitting there, eating up space. The dog smacked himself silly chasing a squirrel and slamming into it the other day, and that was my breaking point.

Back in early September, I told my husband point-blank: “You have until September 25th to put that grill back into the garage, or I will do it myself.” I wasn’t being cute, I wasn’t joking, I gave him a clear ultimatum. He laughed me off, said, “Yeah, yeah, I’ll get to it.” Spoiler alert: he didn’t.

So, last week on my day off, I did it. I wrangled that massive hunk of metal, cleaned the patio, and put it into the garage myself. It was heavy and awkward, but it’s done. I thought he’d be relieved, honestly, because now the patio looks like a patio again instead of a backyard appliance showroom.

Instead? He’s acting like I committed a crime. He’s been sulking, barely speaking to me, and treating me like I’m some kind of plague he has to endure. And to make it worse, he went and dragged his mom into it.

Usually, his mom does not take his side in these petty arguments—if anything, she rolls her eyes at his man-child tendencies. But this time? She said I overstepped. That it was “his grill, his space, his decision.”

I’m sitting here stunned. We already have kids, so divorce isn’t even on the table, but I’m not gonna lie—I’m kind of floored at how dramatic this all got over a grill. I didn’t throw it away. I didn’t break it. I didn’t sell it on Craigslist or Facebook marketplace. I just moved it until Easter or whenever grilling season makes sense again.

Now I genuinely need others opinions on honest know us and won’t be biased: did I overstep? Am I the @$$hole for following through on my ultimatum when he ignored me? And how do I even fix this without just rolling over and apologizing for something I still feel was common sense?

This is what commenters had to say to OP:

LdiJ46 said:

It is totally absurd that he is sulking about this and even more absurd that his mother has gotten involved. Are they all totally insane?

Jaded_Island_9906 said:

Honestly the “his space” is what would’ve sent me for a loop. Excuse me. It’s OUR space. For the WHOLE FAMILY. Why on earth is he sulking that you did his chore? I’d have a long talk about it, including the his space bs. Something else has to be going on bc this is ridiculous.

Junior-Trade5338 said:

So, your 40 yo man baby went and tattled to his mommy? Tell him next time he doesn't put his toys away he'll be grounded for a week! NTA.

Vivid_Motor_2341 said:

Send a group text with him and his mom saying “you have not used the grill in over a month and won’t be using it in the winter. I asked you to have it put away by X date and you agreed. You don’t do it so I did. Drop the sulking there are 7 people who live here you don’t get to take up half the patio all year long for your ego.”