'AITA for putting my phone on 'DO NOT DISTURB' permanently to make a point?'

"AITA for putting my phone on 'DO NOT DISTURB' permanently?"

I (26M) work as a paramedic part time and then other days I am a volunteer firefighter. As of right now due to medical issues, I am on medical leave for ambulance, but I am still doing volunteer firefighting.

Almost every day I have people calling me for a bunch of stuff, some work related which I don't mind but its about stuff that could have been texted, and they will call me at inconvenient times, such as when I am biking, firefighting or other inconvenient times (they even call me at 6am sometimes.)

Most of all, I get calls from my parents every f#$king day asking me what I am doing and basically trying to organize my day like a military schedule.

I tell them to just text but nooooo, they insist on calling. I feel like they and others are trying to control my life and I have to sit here and just say yes. I have decided to put on DND. I allow texts and Messenger and snapchat but i set all calls to go straight to voicemail. My parents complain about it but I don't care, I like my peace.

I know my coworkers wont like it much but I don't have the best relationship with them and I have been a "yes man" to them for a while, I am done being nice. I want to care about my own mental health from now on, and I feel the best way to do that is to take away control from the people trying to destroy it. AITA for doing this? I ask bcause I want to know if I should brag about it to friends.

EDIT: I have a fire pager app on my phone that automatically overrides DND and silent function and turns my volume up to max and makes a loud noise. When that goes off, I obviously respond. All emergency communications are through the pager app, not through phone calls.

The internet did not hold back.

Donutsmell wrote:

If your mental health is suffering, working two high stress, emergency service jobs may not be the best route for your professional career. You may need to scale back to one or look into other job paths. Unfortunately, regarding your actual question YTA.

You can’t work emergency service jobs and then not accept phone calls, especially since one is a volunteer fire department. If there is an all hands on deck situation, messing around with texts or messenger is not a better option to a dispatcher calling you. Can you make it so your family goes to voicemail but your employers can still contact you?

OP responded:

For an "all hands on deck" situation, I have a pager on my phone that overrides DND and silent function. The only way to mute that is to turn the phone completely off.

Whateverusername22 wrote:

Humans didn’t evolve to have stimuli 100% of our days & to be in contact with every person we know at all times.

xxbanana_sniperxx wrote:

It seems like you have trouble setting and maintaining boundaries. I would work on that rather than just all or nothing.

MehTheLackadaisical wrote:

NTA. Protect your peace. If you're on iPhone, you can set up a focus mode to allow specific calls/texts/apps through. I limit who can get through on my phone during my workday with this feature.

iheartwords wrote:

You aren’t required to use a phone for personal calls but YTA for thinking you’ve somehow bested everyone and have something to brag about. I mean, what? The second to last line of your post confirmed what I had been thinking as I was reading. The phone is such a red herring. Whether you’re justified about it or not, you clearly feel you’ve been ordered around and treated badly, seemingly by everyone.

But it’s gotten to the point where now you’re going about this like a toddler trying to show everyone who’s the real boss. Controlling whether your phone rings or not isn’t going to change what has gotten you to this point. And it certainly isn’t something to brag about.

howardcoombs wrote:

I don't answer calls without texts. If someone calls (and they have not texted), it will get ignored/rejected and I will text them "How may I help you" when convenient. If they answer satisfactorily, I will call back when convenient. You set your own routine the way you want to setup your own routine :: but whats with the "brag about it"? Its nothing to brag about, its just the way you choose to live your life.

Runela9 wrote:

I totally get wanting some peace from endless phone calls, but YTA. Sorry man, but you can't work in emergency services and block all incoming calls. If your mental health is bad enough that you can't answer the phone, you really need to talk to your chief about a leave of absence.

People count on you to save lives. If you can't fulfill that commitment right now and need a break that's understandable but poor communication in your situation could literally get people k--led. If it's specifically your parents that are the issue, just block them until they learn to respect your boundaries. Then you can still fulfill your responsibilities without them stressing you out.

SalaudChaud wrote:

Having a phone that is also a computer and also a camera and also a means through which people can make contact through innumerable apps is a pain in the a-- so I like the idea of "outgoing calls only."

Your strategy, such as it is, might be problematic if your firefighting group needs to contact you by phone to deal with something emergent, like, I don't know, a fire. On the assumption that you are not leaving your mates to rescue all the kittens in your town out of trees, NTA.