'AITA for refusing to move my daughter's room for my fiancée's home office?'
"AITA for refusing to move my daughter's room for my fiancée's home office?"
I (32M) have been with my fiancée (30F) for five years, and we're planning our wedding for next spring. I have a 10-year-old daughter, Lily, from a previous relationship. Lily's mother passed away when she was a baby, so it's been just the two of us for most of her life.
My fiancée, Emma, has always had a cordial relationship with Lily, but they've never been particularly close. Recently, Emma suggested that Lily should move into the smaller bedroom to make space for a home office, as Emma works from home.
Lily's current room is the second-largest in the house, and she loves it. I told Emma that I didn't want to uproot Lily from her room, especially since she's already been through a lot.
Emma was upset and accused me of prioritizing Lily over her needs. She argued that as my future wife, her comfort should be equally important. I suggested converting part of the living room into a workspace, but Emma insists that having a dedicated office is essential for her productivity.
Now, there's tension between us, and Emma feels that I'm not considering her needs in our shared home. I want to support Emma's work, but I also want to ensure Lily feels secure and valued. AITA for refusing to move my daughter's room for my fiancée's home office?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Your daughter’s comfort and stability should absolutely come first, especially given her circumstances. A home office can be created in a smaller space or even the living room, but Lily deserves to keep her room OP. NTA
And OP shouldn't be marrying someone who doesn't understand this and also want to prioritize what best for his daughter.
I completely agree! I came here to say that! OP, your fiancée is a walking red flag! Lily should have the small room = this is a power play from your fiance. She wants to be number one in your life. She's competing with a 10 year old. It's the reason why their relationship is not great.
Please reconsider this relationship for the sake of Lily. It's not just about a room. It's much more! 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 Her treatment of lily will only get worse if you marry her.
So basically you're engaged to the soon to be wicked stepmother. I feel sorry for your kid.
NTA. Your daughter would always be your first priority. A home office should be able to fit in the smallest room or some other space, but Lily deserves to keep her own room.
Hate to be the opposite. But your kids, should never take priority over your spouse. That's a recipe for disaster and resentment all around. If a compromise can’t be made, I would seriously look into moving to adequate the needs of all. But you’re both TAH for not realizing or talking about this in the “5” years of dating.