'AITA for refusing to help my friend after they mocked my lifestyle?'

"AITA for refusing to help my friend after they mocked my lifestyle?"

I (24F) have always been pretty frugal. I cook at home, rarely go out, don’t upgrade my phone often, and I’m very intentional about saving money. My friends joke about it, which I usually don’t mind, but one friend in particular, “Aman” (25M), takes it a bit far...

Aman constantly makes comments about me being “cheap,” “living like a college student,” or “missing out on life.” This has been going on for years. I’ve told him it bothers me, and he usually laughs it off and says he’s just joking...

Recently, Aman lost his job and asked me if I could lend him some money to help cover rent for a month. I can afford it without putting myself in a bad spot, but when he asked, I hesitated. I reminded him that he’s spent years making fun of the way I manage my money, and now he’s asking to benefit from it...

I told him I wasn’t comfortable lending him money, especially since he’s never taken my financial boundaries seriously. He got upset and said I was being petty and punishing him over “jokes,” and that friends are supposed to help each other in emergencies...

Now some mutual friends are split, some say I’m within my rights and that it’s my money, others say I’m being cold and holding a grudge when someone’s genuinely struggling...AITA?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Melin_Lavendel_Rosa said:

He says " friends help each other," but when was he a friend to you? He is more a bully than a friend.

TheOneWithSkillz said:

NTA, perhaps your friends can help him out instead.

autotelica said:

NTA. Punishment would be taking money from him. Punishment is not the denial of something they aren't entitled to in the first place. The misuse of the word "punishment" is one of my pet peeves.

pottersquash said:

NTA. Friends aren't just people you happen to know/see.

Mindless-Client3366 said:

NTA. You're under no obligation to lend money to anyone, especially someone who's mocked you multiple times over the years. If your friends are so adamant that Aman needs to be helped, they're welcome to lend him money.

Jealous-Contract7426 said:

Your friend doesn't take financial responsibility seriously. The loan would likely turn into a gift. No biggie 'cause you can afford it right? NTA.

kmk1987kmk said:

NTA. If you want to keep the peace you could ask everyone to contribute. That will force people that have no stake in this to pony up cash. The "friends" that are staying you are being petty are not needed in your life if they can't contribute and put their money where their mouth is.