'AITA for refusing to pay a $100 bill from my sister's in-laws?'
"AITA for refusing to pay a $100 bill from my sister's in-laws?"
So my sister and I planned a family vacation together. We rented a big house for both our families. It was me, my wife, our 1-year-old, our dog, and my sister with her husband and their two kids who are 5 and 3. The house was big enough that her in-laws stayed with us during the first week and our parents came in the second week.
Our dog is a rescue she is very sweet but gets nervous around new people. She knows both our families really well and loves the kids and my brother in law but she had never met his parents before. So we made it clear that she would always be leashed when they were around and that my wife or I would always be there.
Two days into the trip, my sister’s MIL told me she is great with dogs and asked me if she could give her a treat. I said yes but I explained exactly how to do it safely. I told her to get down low so she would not tower over the dog and to move slowly. She said okay but immediately did the opposite. She leaned over her and reached down and the dog got scared and jumped up on her.
I pulled the dog back right away and told her that for the rest of the week it would be better if she did not try to interact with the dog. She seemed fine with that so I thought that was the end of it. Two days later everyone else was out. It was just me, our baby, Sisters MIL+FIL and one of the older kids in the house. I was on the floor playing with my kid when I heard them talking very loudly at the dining table.
It was that kind of loud where it feels like they actually want you to hear it. They were saying things like we will have to get it repaired when we get home and maybe we can find someone cheap to fix it. I could not really ignore it so I asked what was broken and what needed fixing. She said that one of the kids had brought her her broken ankle bracelet.
She said she was not sure what happened. Maybe it broke while she was on the trampoline or bumped into something, or maybe it was when the dog jumped at her earlier that week. I said oh okay that sucks and left it at that. Nobody mentioned it again and the topic never came up once for the next 4 days that they stayed.
Fast forward two weeks after the vacation. My sister called me and said her in laws had a bracelet repaired and now they wanted me to send them 100 dollars for the repair. I was honestly shocked. I called my sister's MIL right away and asked what that was about. She said she thought it must have been the dog when she jumped up on her.
I reminded her that she ignored my clear instructions and that she was not even sure if it was the dog since she had mentioned several other reasons. I told her that if she had talked to me honestly during the trip and said she thought my dog broke it I might have helped pay.
But she said nothing, waited two weeks, and then sent the bill. So I told her no, I was not paying. Now she is upset and told my sister I am an AH. So, AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
kitchen_chemistry405 wrote:
NTA: to me it seems unlikely that the dog managed to break jewelry that was being worn around someone's ankle, especially while jumping UP. And even if it did, there would likely be a scratch left behind not to mention the broken anklet on the floor. It's an unfortunate set of circumstances for sure but I am not buying their story at all.
OP responded:
Yeah, I stupidly didn’t bring that up at the time, and that’s what makes the whole thing feel super sus. The dog would’ve had to actually hit her with a paw for it to break, and that would’ve left a visible scratch or mark.
BigBackeron wrote:
NTA. She should have listened, as your instructions were clear. Her incompetence, her bill.
OP responded:
That’s not even the main issue. The problem is that it was never actually discussed with us, not with me, not with my wife, and as a matter of fact, not even with my sister. I honestly would’ve paid if they had just talked to me directly instead of that weird, staged-sounding conversation that I basically had to respond to. But thank you!
saffron_monsoon wrote:
NTA. (1) She’s not sure the dog broke it, (2) it is unlikely that the dog broke it given what she says the dog did, (3) she chose to interact with the dog in a way that disobeyed the rules you gave her, and (4) she didn’t tell you about this issue until you were all home and it was difficult to discuss face to face.
Basically, she is counting on you paying this to keep the peace. But there will never be peace either way: she’ll be upset now when you don’t pay, or - if you do pay - she will treat you as a patsy forevermore.
Fubar_as_usual wrote:
The poor dog is just a convenient scapegoat. She was told how to interact correctly and disregarded what you told her. It’s highly doubtful the dog did it, but if it did the fault is her own. Don’t give her a cent. BTW, did they pay for their stay or did you and your sister pay? If they stayed for free, tell them they can just put the $100 toward the house rental costs.
wearskittensmittens wrote:
Let her call you three AHs, she still has you beat by a country mile. The kid brought the broken bracelet on the trip and the mother has no clue as to how it got broken but she wants to blame the dog? Tell her you are sorry but it is not your problem. The five year old had the smarts to bring it on the trip? Maybe the kid is a smart enough to fix it themselves. I smell a rat.