'AITA for refusing to pay my brother gas and parking money after he left me waiting in the car?'

"AITA for refusing to pay my brother gas and parking money after he left me waiting in the car for 30 minutes?"

This situation involves me, my twin brother, my older brother, and my friend (let’s call him Dave). Dave bought discounted tickets to an amusement park from a colleague and invited the three of us to go with him. My older brother offered to drive and asked if we could split gas and parking costs. I agreed.

The day at the amusement park was great, no issues there. On the way home, my older brother decided he wanted to stop at Burger King. Important context: I currently have very little money. I’m a full-time student, taking an extra year to finish my studies due to personal reasons, and my student financing hasn’t come in yet. So I need to be really careful with my spending.

Fast food just isn’t something I want to waste money on right now. I've mentioned this to my brothers and Dave multiple times. They should know this. I told them I didn’t want Burger King and preferred to eat something at home. When we parked, I asked if they could at least take their food to go so we could get home sooner.

I wasn’t starving, but I was hungry and wanted to get home and make something cheap. My older brother literally just said “No,” got out of the car, and walked inside. Dave and my twin just followed him. I was annoyed, so I stayed in the car. They were gone for 30 minutes while I sat there waiting.

We dropped Dave off afterward and went home. I didn’t cause a scene, argue, or mention anything about not paying. I just quietly decided at that moment that I wasn’t going to pay anymore because I felt my brother showed me zero consideration.

A while later, my brother sent me a reminder message saying I still owed him for the gas and parking. That’s when I wrote back explaining why I’m not paying and that he’s not getting that money from me.

This caused tension, and my mom got involved, telling me: “You wrote a disrespectful message and I don’t agree with how you’re acting.”

Now I’m wondering if I handled this correctly. What are you guys thoughts?

EDIT: Alright guys, I hear you all. I'm either the Ahole or everyone sucks. Which means I'm in the wrong for this one (as well). I'll pay what the man is owned. I think he could've been nicer and not just say no, but that's a talk for another time. Thanks for letting me see that guys, peace.

FINAL EDIT: I wanted to post a final edit for anyone stumbling across this post after the weekend, just to explain why I reacted the way I did toward my brother. Not as an excuse, but for context.

My family goes out to dinner pretty often, and those moments are usually when we really connect with one another. Because of my financial situation, I haven’t been able to join them for a while, which has made me feel pretty isolated.

When Dave invited us on this trip, I jumped at the chance to finally do something fun with my brother and my friend without worrying about money, school, or struggling to find a job. So when the decision was made to eat at BK, it hit harder than it normally would have.

I felt unheard and left out again, and instead of saying something in the moment, I let that frustration affect my decision afterward. That doesn’t mean it was the right way for me to act, but this is the context behind my reaction. I’ve paid and apologized, cleared things up, and learned from it. Hopefully I’ll find work soon.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

SnooSprouts6437 wrote:

YTA, the majority of the people wanted BK. That's how it rolls when you carpool. If you want to be in charge of what happens, take your own vehicle.

You agreed to help pay for gas and parking; you need to pay up. Next time, be prepared and take snacks with especially knowing you don't want to eat out to save money. And you could have gone it and gotten one item off the dollar menu. Just to hold you over.

jdmac87 wrote:

YTA. The driver decides on stops. If the driver doesn’t want to eat and drive at the same time, then you stop for a meal while they eat. If you want things to run on your schedule, then you drive your car or arrange your own transportation. Not an option? Then you have the choice to not go if you don’t like being on someone else’s schedule. Paying for gas and parking doesn’t entitle you to run the show.

Stiletto929 wrote:

YTA. 3/4 of the people in the car wanted BK. You didn’t want to “waste the money” on it. That was your choice. That doesn’t mean everyone else doesn’t get to eat what they want, in the manner they want. It’s not like this was a 5 course meal taking 2 hours or something. And it wouldn’t have killed you to drop $10 or less on something cheap.

Instead of sulking in the car you could also have gone in, just had a glass of water, and hung out. Instead you acted like a toddler and then refused to uphold your end of the deal. Grow up! Your brother probably won’t be inviting you out again.

DoIWantToKnow6417 wrote:

He drove you to the park as agreed.

So now you have to hold up your side of the deal. The fact he stopped for food, and you couldn't buy any yourself, has got nothing to do with the deal. YTA.

appropriate_storm1 wrote:

YTA. What does him stopping for food have to do with the original agreement? He still used his car to drive everyone to and from the park. You still went to the park. He didn’t make you wait in the car. YOU decided that. It is not his fault you don’t have money for fast food, and it is not his responsibility to cater to one of 4 people. You could have gone in and sat with them.

Finished the day off on a good night with more conversation and fun and still gotten food when you got home. Instead you acted like a child having a temper tantrum. And got treated as such. Good on them. But now your continuing your temper tantrum. How old are you?! You owe him the money for parking and gas. And an apology for being a brat.

weird_black_holes wrote:

YTA. You didn't have to sit there and mope. They wanted their food hot and fresh, not cold and soggy because you didn't want to eat there, and that's reasonable. It's not like the agreement was contingent on your schedule.

The agreement was you pay part of gas and parking if he drove. That's fulfilled. You owe him that money. You're not entitled to his car and what it did for you just because you didn't get your way.

Unicornhair1991 wrote:

YTA. I'd be starving too if I had a full day at an amusement park and wanna stop on the way home. There was no extra gas money to pay it was 30 mins not 90 and you could have gone in and talked to others not sulked in the car like a 3-year-old. You could have also told them you didn't have the money for food. But if you are going on a full day out you should really plan for food. You're in no way the right here.

They did something the majority of the group and most importantly the driver wanted to do. They weren't long or crappy about it. And you decide to throw a tantrum and go back on your word, making sure they won't ask you again btw. My suspicion is you went out on an excursion you knowingly couldn't afford and made a big deal out of a nothing incident to have an excuse to not pay.