'AITA for refusing to pay for our friend's now broken Iphone and sunglasses that our son broke?'

"AITA for refusing to pay for our friends now broken Iphone and sunglasses that our son broke?"

I am 28F, and my husband is 32M; our son in question is 6 months old. Whenever someone holds them, we warn them that they'll try to grab your glasses or phone, and sometimes even your hair. (We are trying to break this habit, but he is 6 months old).

Now, I warned my husband that a friend of mine, 33 F, let's call her Jean, came to visit and wants to hold, which we didn't mind at all. I warned her about it all, saying, "ohh, best taking your sunglasses off your head, he'll grab them. "

Now these are Gucci sunglasses costing almost 800 pounds ( which to me is a crazy amount for sunglasses, but each to their own), she rolled her eyes at me, and accused me of hogging my own baby 🤷‍♀️. I warned her again, she said, " It's fine. So she stood holding him. Took her phone out wanting to take a selfie, which again I am fine with as long as it's not posted (don't want a pic of him online as of yet.)

He, of course, grabbed her sunglasses, got excited as he got them, waved his hands about the sunglasses, and they flew. She screamed, scaring him. He panicked and flailed, hitting her iPhone to the floor. I quickly took him as she was freaking out. She says I need to buy her a new iPhone 16 and replace her sunglasses, or give her the money for them, which is £2300.

I said, "we can't pay that as that's not even my monthly wage. Plus, I am on maternity, but also I don't feel like I should, as you ignored my warnings. " I'm called Heartless for not being more understanding of her being upset. I was more concerned with calming down my son. My husband just shrugged, telling her I did warn her.

I fixed the issues since they were so triggering to people. Also, to those who thought an adult didn't write this, adults can have dyslexia.

So AITA?

The internet did not hold back one bit.

Just_Looking35 wrote:

It’ll probably end the friendship but you would not be the AH if you didn’t pay. She was warned. So I’ll go with NTA. However, you need to realize that in life it’s not always enough to warn and play FAFO.

Sometimes you have to say “Sorry, I’m concerned about what he’ll do to your belongings. You can hold him after you put them over there.” Or in a made up scenario, “I know your child loves dogs but I have to say no. My pup may not react well to being pet by a toddler.” You have to take charge so nothing actually happens.

OP responded:

That's a great point, and we will probably be taking that on, so something like this doesn't happen again. Thank you.

rmric0 wrote:

NTA. If you are picking up a six-month old then you are taking responsibility for that child, especially if you've been warned that they're grabby. It would be different if the kid was six and there had been time to tell them the difference between right and wrong and how to behave with other people's things.

Confident-Ad7531 wrote:

In this case, this is on the friend. She was warned more than once and she chose to ignore it. And in the future, if she asks to hold your kid, tell her that you're choosing to save her the trouble of having something broken again.

swillshop wrote:

NTA. Your financial situation is not relevant. If it was your responsibility, it would remain so. You would be asking for kindness for the debt to be forgiven/ reduced. But you are NOT responsible. You duly warned her. She took responsibility when she rolled her eyes, dismissed your warning, and said, “it’s fine.”

End of story. End of discussion with her.

(I’m guessing she wanted a selfie of the baby and her - with her fine Gucci glasses. That mattered more to her than safeguarding her stuff. She could have also asked you to take a picture of her and the baby.)

Ok-disaster2022 wrote:

When I read the top, I thought surely you're responsible. But NTA you warned her, specifically about the glasses. She overrode your suggestion. A 6-month-old is still a bundle of nerves learning how everything works.

Also 800 pounds for non prescription glasses is indeed stupid.

77Meg77 wrote:

NTA. You warned her. And specifically about the sunglasses too. And don’t even consider trying to teach your infant not to grab at things. That’s just what babies do. All babies, not just yours. They are curious and want to explore everything. And put it into their mouth if they can! Everyone knows this.

You don’t own this person a dime. She decided she knew better than you do so she chose to ignore your warning and left her sunglasses within baby’s reach.

And an infant doesn’t have enough strength to pry a cell phone from an adult’s hand, so she was not holding onto it firmly enough. She could have handed the phone to you to have you take the shot. If she really wanted one. But why does she need a picture of herself holding someone else’s infant?

HiddenThinks wrote:

If your child were 6 years old, I could see an argument for not having taught your child proper behaviour

However, in this situation, the kid is only 6 months old. You provided adequate warning, so NTA. You owe her nothing.