'AITA for refusing to let my roommate borrow my expensive headphones and confronting her?'
"AITA for refusing to let my roommate borrow my expensive headphones and confronting her when she tried to take them without asking?"
i recently bought a pair of expensive noise canceling headphones. They’re really important to me since I need them for studying in our loud apartment. My roommate Maggie asked to borrow them to use during her café shift, but I said no because I wasn’t comfortable with them leaving the apartment. She wasn’t happy and called me ridiculously protective.
A few days later, I caught her taking them off the counter without asking. I immediately told her to put them back and said I didn’t trust her with my stuff anymore. Now she’s mad at me, saying I’m selfish, and she’s been giving me the cold shoulder.
One of our other roommates agrees with me, but another thinks it’s no big deal to let her borrow them. I’m wondering if I overreacted by not letting her borrow them and confronting her when she took them. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought:
ctma7 writes:
NTA, YOUR belongings are up to YOU to decide when and if to share them. I’m also confused as to why the roommate requested to use them for working in a cafe setting, which is a job that requires human interaction and communication? If she wanted some noise cancelling headphones so badly she could get her own.
I can understand not having the money, but save up some weekly allowance for a few weeks and get them or find some cheaper ripoff.
At BARE MINIMUM, you should always have first priority and to be able to use your own items without having to consult someone else if no deals werw previously agreed upon!! She dismissed your response, broke your trust and is trying to victimise herself when caught.
aghaup writes:
NTA. She asked. You said no. That should've been the end of it. She tried to take them when you already said no, and now she's lost all access to your things. If she likes the headphones so much, she can buy them with her own money.
You're better than me because I would've been swinging if Maggie tried to take my things anyway after I had already told her no.
You other roommate obviously this you're wrong because now this grown child is disturbing the peace and it's not her things that are being borrowed. If there isn't a lock on your door, get one.
Or a lock box to put important/expensive things in as well as a camera. Something tells me your stuff is going to get stolen or mysteriously broken with how childish Maggie is being.
faogh7 writes:
NTA. A suggestion to not leave things you don’t want to be used by others in common areas as you obviously have two who think it means anyone can use them. For the headphones either keep them on your head, around your neck or in your room. If the roommate thinks it’s no big deal then they are welcome to let Maggie borrow their stuff.
If your room has a locking doorknob if you haven’t been using it I suggest you start and always have the key with you.
If it doesn’t have one speak to the landlord about getting one or purchase an exterior grade one yourself and find a YouTube to install it (take pictures of the current knob before you start including the latching side so you see how it needs to face) and save all the pieces from the original in a ziplock bag to reinstall when you move out.