'AITA for revealing confidential info as payback to my sister and her boyfriend?'
"AITA for revealing confidential info as payback to my sister and her boyfriend?"
Full-Neighborhood103
I (27F) have a sister (25F) who's in a relationship with her high school sweetheart. However they haven't dated during all of these years cause back in high school my sister found out that her boyfriend was two-timing her, literally having second girlfriend from another school which neither of them knew anything about the other one, which you can imagine ended up as a really ugly break-up.
However after some years my sister and her boyfriend ended up reconnecting and he convinced her to give him a second chance after he promised her that he's matured from his teenage years. Personally I don't think he deserved it, but at the end of the day it's my sister's life and her decisions to make.
However my sister (to whom I'm close) kept confiding in me that despite getting back together with her boyfriend she still hasn't completely forgiven him for his past betrayal and she's afraid he might cheat on her again. They also had a lot of arguments about his loyalty whenever she catches checking out another woman.
Now come my engagement party where both my sister and her boyfriend attended and my sister's boyfriend suddenly starts making unprovoked comments about how he's surprised that I accepted my fiance's proposal when a babe like me could do so much than him and that it really looks to him like I'm settling.
I was utterly shocked at where was this even coming from cause he never once said anything bad about our relationship before. And the worst of it was after me and my fiance started confronting him over his rude comments my sister took his side.
She even said that her boyfriend just said what everyone else is thinking but was too afraid to say, which again came from absolutely out of nowhere cause my sister has always been supportive about my relationship with my fiance before.
At that point I just lost it and I said how funny it is that you two are talking shit about my relationship when my sister herself told me how she still has insecurities over your cheating ass and also that you two are still having arguments cause her boyfriend's still acting like the pig he was from high school.
Well this evolved into an even bigger argument where my sister called me a spiteful b*tch for sharing info she entrusted me with just to destroy her relationship cause I couldn't accept the truth about my own.
Eventually the party was cut short and while my parents do think my sister was way out of line and her and her boyfriend owe me apologies for what they said they also think I was in the wrong for revealing what my sister told me in private just to get back at her.
Honestly it was a heat of the moment thing but I can't say I regret it when my sister and her boyfriend still haven't showed remorse for the rude things they said about my fiance and our relationship. AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
GreedyInspection6346
Your sister's bf had some nerve to tell you what he said. His sole purpose was to ruin your party and humiliate both you and your fiancé. Because if he had any concern (not that it's any of his business in the 1st place) he would voice them privately.
Did you or your your fiancé ever argue with him? Cause it sounds like he has some hidden resentment towards you. You said he never shared an opinion on your relationship but does he have the type of personality where he would speak up like that?
Regarding your sister, her behaviour is incomprehensible as well. And I completely understand your reaction. Your sister sounds entitled. It's okay for her to ruin your engagement party and be out of line but it's not okay for her to have her stuff disclosed. Guess she learned that you reap what you sow. NTA.
Full-Neighborhood103 OP responded:
I'd definitely say my sister's boyfriend's an asshole but this behavior still took us by surprise. I honestly never even thought he cared at all about my relationship with my fiance.
Robbes_Watch
I debated between NTA and ESH, and I vote NTA. At first I thought the boyfriend was just joking, you know, just laughing and saying "How did a shlub like you get a babe like Susie,heh heh?" But then when your sister took his side and said it's what everyone was thinking, things took on a different complexion.
And then later she pointed out that you could not accept the truth about your own relationship, which tells me that she was totally on board with what her BF said to you and had no problem disparaging/tearing down your relationship during your actual engagement party. Who does that?
One cannot insult someone or someone's SO and just assume there will be no clap-back. You did your sister and her BF a favor by revealing that their relationship has serious cracks.
Wintroza
NTA. Did you give them a low, petty blow? Yes. Did they deserve it? Yes. Will this cause even more drama? Yes. Is it worth it? That's all up to you. Personally I can't stand people who think they can say whatever they want and then expect the other party to take the high road, so I think what you did was warranted considering the setting.
I mean, they were ruining your engagement party without any remorse after all. Though I do understand where the people who think you shouldn't have done it are coming from.
AWhiskeyKitten
NTA- Your sister and her partner shouldn’t be airing unsolicited opinions on your relationship unless they’re willing to get some back. Unfortunately for them you had reasons to back yours up.