'AITA for reporting a coworker who sent me a pic of a female intern, getting him fired?'
"AITA for reporting a coworker who sent me a pic of a female intern, getting him fired?"
I'm (19m) working an internship at this company and we get to WFH one day a week. This is my first corporate experience. Our teams dress code is pretty casual, especially at home, for example I've seen someone show up to work in sweatpants and a t-shirt and jacket before.
A couple weeks ago, we had a 1 hour zoom meeting and our team were all wfh during that day. The meeting was with me, Mark and James (both interns from my college that were friends with each other but that I didn't know before), Zoe (19f intern from a different college), Aaron (my boss), and a few others.
During the call, I noticed that Zoe was wearing a slightly sheer top with no bra, which became more noticeable when she turned on another light. Nobody else said anything during the call, and I thought I should say something but I ended up not saying anything either.
I rearranged the zoom call on my screen so that I couldn't see her camera anymore. I didn't really want to say anything especially since Aaron wasn't saying anything and I thought that maybe he might talk to her later/deal with it or something like that, since he's her manager too.
Mark was late and joined the meeting partway through. Near the end of the call, he sent me some screenshots of Zoe's camera, one being more zoomed in and with the brightness turned up, and with the message, "Bro do you see what Zoe's wearing lol? We can see everything". I wasn't sure how to respond so I just didn't respond to it.
Mark has said questionable things about and to her in the past as well and I remembered some of the stuff we were talked to about, in regards to inappropriate workplace behavior and what to do about it. I wasn't really sure right then what to do, but after thinking about it I ended up forwarding the message to my HR person.
As a result, HR ended up interviewing us to see what went on, and put Mark under review, and he eventually ended up getting fired with cause. It also was found out that he sent the message to James as well. I didn't really think or intend for Mark to get fired but that's what happened.
When I got back to the office, it was just me and James there that morning and he went to me and told me that it wasn't too big of a deal and that I didn't need to get Mark fired and that now he's screwed because he's close to graduating his masters degree. I didn't really know how to respond to that and I just went to my seat and got to work.
Zoe ended up thanking me and said she didn't mean that for her outfit, but she also said she wished someone had said something during the meeting, and that Aaron spoke to her about attire later.
Before this, I was getting along really well with the team and was getting stuck into one of the projects. But after Mark got fired, Aaron who was also mentoring me, as well as James, started talking to me a bit less.
The next one-on-one meeting with Aaron was shorter, and there was less small talk at the office. They also stopped the bantering that we were having fun with too. I don't think I overreacted. AITA for reporting Mark, leading to him being fired?
Lots of people were on OP's side:
Rule Number One of corporate life is never to put anything in email or text that you'd not want to be seen by the general public. Mark learned this the hard way. Actually, now that everyone has a video camera on their phones this rule extends to actions and words.
This may not be the first complaint against him. Just keep working hard.
also—lots of times people in Mark’s position get fired for they way they RESPOND to the HR intervention. And that’s all on them.
100% this. I’ve had employees in the same situation as this dude many times. In edge cases the ones who recognized a fuck up and took the issue seriously kept their job the ones who decided to be belligerent and say things like ‘It was just a joke,’ or something similar, were escorted out.
The fact that the vibe has suddenly changed is a good thing. The office is not a fraternity.
Didn't the moderator of the group have the ability to block her screen?
Yeah, they should have. If manager noticed, should have taken her off camera view and shot her a private message. Since manager is now giving OP could shoulder, he probably was enjoying the view and is afraid to say anything around him that might get him reported
It wouldn’t be surprising if the manager was also reprimanded for not doing this. Could explain his attitude.
Some commenters did not agree though:
YTA, and that's why everyone at your work is treating you that way. Snitching immediately without having an adult conversation is not tolerated by most people. You need to get a new job, either way.
I mean it was inappropriate for a work meeting. I really don’t see an issue with someone commenting on how inappropriate it was. Sending the pic was a bit overkill tho. But like all the other comments said, no one is gonna wanna be your friend anymore. You had to have known this would happen.
Also ur just an intern man 😩. It wasn’t like you are in any position of power. You got someone well liked fired over a comment that everyone in that meeting probably thought in their heads. Don’t expect a return offer.
1. You went around Aaron, your manager, directly to HR and made him look incompetent
2. No one will banter with you anymore because you might report them to HR
3. It was obvious what would happen if you reported him, you are lying to yourself to make yourself feel better. It was a snake move likely to remove your competition for a full time role
I'm usually a fixer and HR would be saved for something more serious. I would have told Mark that was disrespectful and could get him fired, and that Zoe probably had no idea they could see. Then I would have immediately contacted Zoe and not let her continue to be on the call like that.
That's just me and that's s womans prospective. I will say if Mark continued after this I would then talk to HR with several incidents to report.