'AITA for reporting my coworker for stealing my food?' 'She called me heartless.'
"AITA for reporting my coworker for stealing my food?"
My coworker is single and pregnant. I think she’s due in June. We’re all happy for her and planning a big baby shower at work before she goes on maternity leave. The problem is she keeps stealing my lunch or snacks without asking. I literally caught her devouring my food, and when I confronted her, she started crying about cravings and called me heartless.
I didn’t want to make a scene at work, so I just let it go and told her to at least ask before touching my food next time. Then it happened again. This time, it was my labeled tiramisu from a local bakery. I had planned to bring it to my friend after work. I lost it.
I told her there was a label on the box with my name and a DO NOT TOUCH MY FOOD post-it on it. She just said, “I know, but the baby really wanted tiramisu! It was sooooo good." Then she started crying again and making a scene.
So I reported it to my boss. Now my boss wants to meet with both of us on Friday. Was I the ahole? Some coworkers think reporting her was too much and that if I’m so worried about my food, I shouldn’t put it in the work fridge. She is pregnant and single she probably can’t afford since she is single so be a little empathetic. Did I overreact?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Worth-Season3645 said:
NTA….stealing is never ok and using her pregnancy as an excuse to do so? And your boss is wrong for meeting with both of you. You reported it. He/she needs to now address it with co-worker.
As for other co-workers, tell them they are free to bring in extra for pregnant co-worker. And I would be bringing in a cooler and keeping my food at my desk. See how the other co-workers like when their food goes missing from the fridge when yours is not there.
mfruitfly said:
NTA. When you go in to the meeting this week, be calm and very clear: You have labeled your food, you caught coworker eating your food, you asked her not to do it again, she did it again. I would also include the cost of what she ate.
You are in a professional environment. Her personal life is none of your concern and while yes, we can all help support a coworker going through a tough time, that is not what is happening here. Her "cravings" are not something that mean she gets to go do what she wants and take from others.
And honestly, your coworkers who say you shouldn't have put it in the fridge are insane. If your boss says something similar, you should ask them: So are you saying that the communal fridge is a free-for-all? That anything ANYONE puts in the fridge is fair game to anyone on staff?
That if I put clearly labeled food in that fridge, anyone can take it, and that I can take anything in it for myself? My guess is the answer is no, and your boss probably wouldn't say that. But you can pose the same question to your coworkers: Oh so I can eat anything in the fridge? Good to know!
Impossible-Place-365 said:
NTA. She’s being manipulative and using her pregnancy as an excuse for her poor behavior. When I was pregnant, working back shift, I saw a tray of Costco muffins in the fridge and I REALLY wanted a chocolate one.
Did I STEAL it?! No! I ASKED my manager if they were for a special occasion or if I cooked have one. They were for a morning meeting so he said I COULD NOT have one. Guess what? I DIDN’T HAVE ONE! She’s manipulative and using her pregnancy and tears to see what she can get away with.
Pseudo-Data said:
NTA - you’ve every right to put your food in a communal fridge and expect it not to be touched. Being single and pregnant is not a free pass to take whatever you please, without even asking, because "the baby wants…"
Anyone telling you you to just accommodate her at work - tell them they are more than welcomed to start a ‘craving fund’ for her if they’d like to pay for her food and that they can start by paying you back the $X you paid for the Tiramisu.
MerlinBiggs said:
NTA. Being pregnant doesn't entitle you to be a thief. Don't give in to her pleas for sympathy, she'll just keep on stealing if you do.
FormSuccessful1122 said:
NTA. I've had three children. Cravings are not so overwhelming that you need to steal people's food. Your coworker is acting like Rapunzel's mother, and we know how that went. She's entitled and annoying.
Greyt-garlic said:
NTA being pregnant doesn't give you permission to steal. Also she's idiotic because most tiramisu contains raw egg and alcohol so wtf is she doing? I hope she gets written up and suspended because that's not okay. She needs to reimburse you for the food she stole.