'AITA for ringing my neighbor's doorbell at 12am to tell him to pickup his bag of dog crap?'
"AITA for ringing my neighbor's doorbell at 12am to tell him to pickup his bag of dog crap that was in front of my house?"
The incident goes like this
Around 9-10pm I go out to take out my trash and see a bag on the shared walk way between me and my neighbors house (on my side). I go ring his doorbell and ask him if that's his bag. He says yes, apologizes and says hell pick it up. I left it at that.
Then around 12am I go outside to greet in-laws and I still see that doodoo bag there. So I ring his door bell again. The conversation goes something like this:
Him: "Hey whats up"
Me : "I want to have a chat."
Him: It's 12, my baby is sleeping.
Me: I know, I'd rather not be here but I want to discuss something important, can you come out.
Him: "Okay I'll be right out."
comes out
Me: "Why is there bag of dog doo in front of my house."
Him: "Sorry I left it there I was going to pick it up in the morning."
Me: "First off, your dog shouldn't be taking a dump where we all walk, second when your dog takes a doodoo, you put it in a bag, and you dispose of it, immediately. Do you disagree? Do you think I'm being unreasonable"
Him: "No I don't disagree and you're not unreasonable, however don't be ringing my doorbell after 10pm."
Me: "Don't leave your dog excrement in front my house, now pick it up, and I hope this is the last time I have to deal with this issue"
Him: "I'll pick it up, but don't ever be ringing my doorbell at 12am again"
I'll end it here. So, was I wrong to ring his doorbell at 12am to get him to pick his dog crap up? Should I have had him pick it up at a more convenient time for him?
Update to add context: This isn't the first time he left his dog crap in front of my house. It has happened at least two times before. However this was the first time I confronted him.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
phantomshe wrote:
Everyone is TA here. But ESPECIALLY you. He probably just got distracted, and the guy seemed to be cool about it when you knocked on the door the first time, and he apologized. What makes you think knocking on anyone's door at 12am is the right thing to do?
And then to come at him the way you did was more disrespectful than him forgetting a bag of poop on the sidewalk. Honestly, you should go apologize for the way you handled that. He clearly didn't leave it there to spite you. Seems like he just FORGOT. Don't forget we are all just human.
OP responded:
Just to be clear it wasn't on the sidewalk. It was in front my patio/backyard door. I had to be careful to not run over it when i was taking my trash bins out.
Ok_Nothing_9733 wrote:
YTA, both of you are but you moreso. This conflict comes from your absolutely bat-crazy midnight doorbell ringing and inflexible and condescending tone. This could have been resolved during daytime hours with a kind and respectful convo, but you did something totally rude and socially unacceptable (ringing the bell at midnight is seriously not okay) and made things worse because of your strong emotions.
OP responded:
If not gentle parenting a guy who is probably 5-10 years older than me is being an AH then i will gladly be an AH.
SmokedStone wrote:
NTA. He could've fully avoided this issue altogether by being a responsible pet owner and not leaving crap on the sidewalk. He knows what he's doing and just doesn't expect to be held accountable or confronted. If he does it again, start leaving them directly outside his front door. He knows what he's doing is wrong.
rollingfishstick wrote:
YTA. You were wrong to ring your neighbor's doorbell at 12a. You can try to add reasons to justify your behavior, and no, the guy shouldn't have left a bag of dog crap in your yard, but ringing a doorbell at 12a is asshole behavior. Especially when he said he has a baby?
Tf is wrong with you? Do you think the morning dew is going to cause that bag of crap to grow into a garbage bag of crap? What was so important about it that it needed to be taken care of in the 2 hours between 10p and 12a? The principle of the matter? Yes, YTA.
GreekAmericanDom wrote:
NTA. This is entirely on your neighbor. I believe the proper response should have been "Well, I wouldn't have had to, if you had just picked up your doodoo in the first place or at least when I asked you the first time."
Maybe your neighbor is overwhelmed. Maybe he even deserves some empathy, but they shouldn't be leaving literal shit in front of your house.
Tryingtobelevel wrote:
ESH - It's midnight, they have a baby. He should not have done it. It's gross.
Also, it was a mistake, he admitted to the mistake, and said it would be fixed. Why are you blowing this up into World War 3? Classic two wrongs do not make a right.
chinacat2u2 wrote:
OP you made every interaction hereafter so difficult for yourself. Dang dude just be normal and throw it on their roof…Jeeze🙄
yeahipostedthat wrote:
ESH. He shouldn't be leaving dog bags there but ringing his bell over it at midnight is bonkers as well.