"AITA for saying my BF’s Joker impression is too annoying?"
I’m 25 female, my boyfriend is 26 male and we’ve been together for about 3 years. He does tons of impressions and as someone who grew up watching SNL and likes to laugh I love his impressions.
He does everything from Mickey Mouse, to every South Park character, to politicians. And for the last year or so has been doing a joker impression.
Now when I say his Joker impression is good, it’s REALLY GOOD.
Over the past year his impression has gotten so good I’m convinced he could get cast as the next joker. He does this creepy joker laugh and does the whole monologue “wanna know how I got these scars?… my father was a bit of a drinker…” sometimes when he does this he’ll put his face really close to mine when he says it and it’s super creepy.
I’ve tried telling him quite a few times that it creeps me out and I don’t like it but he’s always taken it as a compliment because that’s kinda its purpose, and means he’s doing a good job.
Now here’s where I feel like I might be TA. He did this same thing the other night.
It was late, I was tired getting out of his car and he started with it again and I told him it’s creepy and I don’t like it. Then he started doing the laugh and I told him I’m not joking anymore, it’s annoying and pisses me off. When I said he was annoying he looked so shocked and sad. I mean his whole demeanor changed and his face dropped and he hasn’t done a single impression since.
AITA for saying he was annoying? I hated the impression but at the end of the day it was just a stupid impression and I didn’t want to hurt him. Hoping unbiased outside opinions can help with this.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Voidfishie wrote:
INFO: Had you tried actually having a conversation with him about it, preferably not when he was in the middle of doing the impression?
OP responded:
The only times I had tried to have conversations about it was when he would do the impression. I never tried to have an conversation outside of him doing the impression.
inductionionN wrote:
This is giving me flashbacks to when I used to date a voice artist. He just did impressions and funny voices all the time. To strangers, to the server at the restaurant, to my friends, to people he talked to on the phone. It was awful, especially to me, an introvert who was mortified at him interrupting strangers to do a funny voice. Just insufferable. NTA. I would not be able to tolerate this.
Plum_Blossims wrote:
Girl. My ex bf is also good at impressions and would do the Heath Ledger joker as well. He absolutely loved it. I told him multiple times that it creeped me out. It was very good and that's why it creeped me out. It really grated on my nerves and I just didn't like it. He never could completely stop.
My experiences that people who are good at impressions don't know when to turn it off or when to not turn it on in the first place. They think everyone loves it and will break out their Impressions at parties, but people don't tend to like that unless they're watching a specific performance. You have my sympathy. You are NA.
IllustriousBowler259 wrote:
A performer needs to be able to read the audience reaction, and he was more involved with doing than reading. If he really is good, encourage him to join an acting or improv group and find a way to display his skills to better effect and receive the attention he's looking for.
NTA for stopping him. You told him you didn't like it, asked him to stop. Just because you laugh at something once doesn't mean you want to hear it 100 times more.
Crimsonkinght_004 wrote:
NAH - He’s feeling some type of way because it seems like he genuinely didn’t get that you didn’t like it until you snapped at him. And I understand how it was frustrating for you, because he took your comments of it being creepy as compliments when you really just wanted it to stop.
I think you and he just need to sit down and have an honest conversation. If you enjoy his impressions in general, then encourage him to do them around you, just not this particular one.
This might seem silly, but I wonder if you two could even come up with a “safe word” to end playful banter and impressions when you really aren’t in the mood, so he understands right then that you really don’t want that kind of discussion at the time.
Some people have trouble shifting from playful banter and bits, so maybe having a clear signal word could help him transition from that, while you are able to feel in control of your communicative needs so things no longer come to a point where you feel you need to shout to be heard.
marypfra wrote:
NTA. You didn’t lie - he wouldn’t listen to you after you repeatedly asked him to stop. It became annoying. I’m annoyed just reading about his actions. Hopefully he will do better with his listening skills in the future.
Traintosomewhere wrote:
Okay so it was high school but I got a great response from my V for vendetta roses monologue
And I kinda held onto that because I’m insecure and didn’t think anyone would actually like me.
I know it’s projecting but I’m feeling a little similarity to escapism by pretending to be someone else.
I don’t think you are TA at all but maybe you should tell him you like to be with HIM. Not the Joker not Cartman. Him.