I (21f) am a single mom to one child (5f). We live in a two bedroom apartment with a roommate (23f). I still share a room with my daughter so my roommate can have the bigger room with the master bathroom attached. I work, donate plasma, do deliveries. Do everything I can to make ends meet for me and my kid. My roommate gets a lot of family support that I don't have.
Any time she needs money or her credit card bill paid off, she'll reach out to her family and they'll provide it for her. I don't have that. I make too much for government assistance working so things have been beyond tight. I am counting every single penny to make ends meet. I can't donate plasma anymore because I've dropped below the 110 pound weight limit by only eating one meal a day so I can stretch our groceries further.
My roommate orders out constantly. Sushi, chipotle, you name it and she's usually ordering out. She never offers to buy me or my daughter anything and has even laughed when she uber eat's McDonald's and my daughter had a tantrum because she wanted a happy meal.
She's also CONSTANTLY late on her share of the bills so I find myself working even more to keep a roof over mine and my daughter's head. I am supposed to receive child support from my daughter's father (he was 21 when I was 16 and got knocked up) but it's so very rare that I actually receive it, I just don't count on it.
Today I was planning on going to one of our local church's food bank because my roommate hadn't contributed any groceries and our shelves were looking pretty bare. I got myself and my daughter ready and since it's starting to get cold, I grabbed one of my warmer jackets, stuck my hand in the pockets and found a 20 dollar bill I guess I stuck there for whatever reason. I actually couldn't believe I found money!
Like I almost started crying because this little bit of money meant I could do laundry at the laundry mat and not have to count change to get enough gas in my car to get me back and forth to work and my daughter to school this week.
We went to the food bank, came back to our apartment and as I was unloading what they gave me, I told my roommate how happy I was to find that 20 bucks. My roommate got huffy and asked why didn't I share it with her. And of course I'm like HUH because my roommate has never shared her money with me, has never really helped me out of a bind when I've needed it.
My roommate went on to complain that her parents aren't giving her as much money each month and she's looking for a job and doesn't know how she's going to pay her maxed out credit card (meanwhile I don't even have a credit card to fall back on) And she called me a selfish b and accused me of trying to get us evicted (which is something I'm actively trying to avoid because I am CONSTANTLY juggling other bills and utilities just to make sure the entirety of the rent is paid on time).
I ended up walking away from her and just locking myself and my daughter in in our room because she was really mad over this and I don't think she should have been? Here I am wearing dirty clothes and skipping meals to make sure my daughter eats and not turning the heat on until absolutely necessary and she went out to hang out with friends and I guess to complain about me more.
Am I the ahole here reddit? I know it's really sad that 20 bucks made me so happy but I didn't think my roommate would react that way either.
NTA - she was looking for a fight. Hopefully she will apologize but she was way out of line taking her crap out on you. You're not a punching bag, don't allow it to slide if she doesn't apologize within a couple days.
NTA. You are working your a$s off to raise your child and should not have to worry about your childish roommate. I understand this economy is hard, and the government is against anyone just trying thier best. Which makes having a roommate is the only way to get by.
But I would recommend you stop supporting her all together. Hide groceries in your room with a lock on the door. I would go to the landlord about the rent not being paid on time. If you don't stop helping her, she will continue to take advantage of your kindness.
NTA. You put your hand in YOUR jacket pocket and found $20. Now, who could it have belonged to? Who could possibly have put it in YOUR pocket? Your roommate is an idiot.
Your jacket your $20. Why dies she think that she is entitled to anything.
NTA but make sure your things are put away and your bedroom door is locked. She really believes she’s entitled to your money and who knows how far she’s willing to go to get it.
NTA. It’s your jacket, so the 20$ are yours. Also, your roommate sounds immature and toxic af. If you can move out, I recommend it. Doesn’t sound it will get any better (actually it can just get worse).