'AITA for spoiling my son and rubbing it in my family's faces now that he's successful?'
"AITA for spoiling my son and rubbing it in my family's faces now that he's successful?"
So, here’s the deal. I (36F) had my son when I was very young. Everyone in my family had something to say about it. They told me I’d ruin my life, that I’d never be able to provide for him, and that spoiling him would just make things worse. They said I was babying him too much and that he’d grow up spoiled and incapable of handling life on his own.
But you know what? I ignored them. I worked my bu%$ off to give my son everything I could. I didn’t just spoil him with material things; I gave him love, attention, and support, even when they said I was being too soft. I wanted him to feel secure and loved, something I didn’t always have growing up.
Fast forward to now, my son (21M) is a successful young man. He’s already doing well in his career, and he’s got big plans for the future. And guess what? He spoils me now. He takes me on vacations, buys me nice things, and makes sure I never have to worry about money.
I also have a well-paying job myself, so between the two of us, I’m living comfortably. We have a great relationship, and I couldn’t be prouder of the man he’s become.
Recently, at a family gathering, the topic of my son came up, and I couldn’t resist rubbing it in their faces a little. I reminded them how they all said I was doing everything wrong, how they criticized me for being too soft on him, and how they said he’d never amount to anything.
Now here I am, living a comfortable life with a beautiful, successful son who loves and takes care of me, while some of those who were the loudest critics are still struggling with money and other issues.
Some of them got pretty quiet, and a few even tried to downplay his success, saying he’s just lucky or that I shouldn’t rely on him so much. But honestly, it felt good to finally prove them wrong. My son worked hard to get where he is, and I’m incredibly proud of both of us for making it despite the odds. So, AITA??
Edit: Some family members would refuse to help me with I asked for help raising my son which is why I’m a bit petty now
Here's what people had to say to OP:
I’ve always been of the mindset that if you truly know you’re hot s^%$ you don’t need to brag about it. It sounds like you’re still insecure because of the way they spoke to you when you were 15 and hanging onto that has made you lash out as a result.
YTA it’s okay to be proud of yourself and your son but you don’t need to put other people down to get there.
Motherivyy OP replied:
I don’t perceive them as inferior just a bit petty they didn’t believe in me and didn’t help me and now I proved them wrong.
lmao, talk about petty when youre the petty one is ironic.
Motherivyy OP replied:
Is that not what I said? “I’m just a bit petty”
Your mindset is stuck at 15.
I can’t wait to see how you will react when he finds the woman he wants to marry.
Motherivyy OP replied:
I would be happy for him!
Even if the spoiling stopped? Because honestly I can’t see a woman being okay with coming second to a man‘s mother.
Motherivyy OP replied:
I have my own job! I wouldn’t blame my son if he put his wife above me and I don’t know why you think I would care as long as my son is happy.
There's a few comments like this and I'm confused, am I missing something?
Motherivyy OP replied:
I don’t know why they think I would care I would be happy my son found a wife I’m just as confused as you honey.
The part of your OP where you say "...so between the two of us, I'm living comfortably". That makes it sound like a partner with combined finances type of relationship and not a mother son relationship.
Yeah, honestly, it seems like she sees the kid as an investment that has just vested.
You know it's funny how family feels the need to criticize and tell you that you are doing everything wrong but then gets on the defensive when you prove them all wrong. You are definitely not the AH and you should be proud of what you and your son have accomplished, regardless of how they feel now since it was their own fault for bringing it all up again.
lol your family just sounds like a bunch of jealous losers. Screw them. You rock Mom.
HatersGonnaHate