'Spoiled princess' orders takeaway after in-laws called her a 'picky eater.' AITA?

"AITA for ordering a takeaway after my in-laws ate my food and called me a picky eater?"

I (30sf) had a bbq with my partners family about a week ago. Both me and my partner brought food for ourselves and to share as well, since I don't eat certain things (meat apart from bird meat, fish/seafood, can't have too much lactose products or anything too oily and intolerant to a couple of fruits...

With all the above I get very nasty stomach issues if consumed and fish no matter how fresh or cooked just stinks to me, this was the case from very young age). The food we brought included some chicken pieces, wings, and veggies like asparagus, potatoes and corn.

After we got settled I went to grab some of the food we brought to find out all of it is gone. I have questioned my FIL about it as he was in charge of the grill and he told me other family members ate it first.

I have pointed out that it was the food we brought with ourselves and intended to eat ourselves too, but both FIL and MIL dismissed me and said I am just being a picky eater since there's still food on the table (beef and pork, which i can't eat).

I got annoyed and just ordered a takeaway for myself (I don't have stomach issues after eating from the place). My in-laws called me an ahole since I haven't asked anyone else if they wanted to order too and because it made some of the kids upset...

(The "kids" in question are all between 14 to 35+ in ages). My partner is torn in between and my in laws are still making sparky comments and call me a "spoiled princess."

Here's what people had to say to OP:

nuggets256 said:

My wife doesn't eat pork, and hasn't the whole time I've known her. My family is partly Japanese and as an extension uses a lot of pork in cooking. When we have family cookouts there's a staple recipe that my dad cooks that's one of his favorite things his mom made while she was alive, but it includes bacon.

As soon as he found out she didn't eat pork he immediately changed the recipe to turkey bacon and the whole family always tries to limit pork used around her. It's wild to me they're not accommodating you and especially that your partner isn't standing up for you. NTA.

Past_Entertainment55 said:

NTA. I’m so confused though. Do all these esh commenters not understand the concept of dietary restrictions/requirements?

zealot_ratio said:

Your partner needs to step up. There's no torn between here. They were jerks, and they're continuing to be jerks. Whether or not you're a picky eater is irrelevant. NTA (but possibly ESH if you didn't in any demarcate that your food was yours, or expected them to cook it for you). However, even if you had, that's a faux pas, and doesn't excuse them being terrible then and after the fact.

Junior-Equipment-895 said:

NTA but your in-laws showed you they don't care about you. My sisters boyfriend has a nut allergy and my entire immediate family makes sure there is no nuts or anything packaged in a facility that has nuts. It is insane that they won't even try.

SoggyMoss1 said:

NTA. They ate all of the food you brought, ignored your dietary needs, and then mocked you for trying to manage your health? Lmao, that’s not just rude, it’s mean. You did what you had to do.

Motor_Dark6406 said:

NTA, why would anyone else need takeaway? THEY were at a bbq with food they could eat.

After reading the comments, OP provided more information:

A few points that were missed. As stated at the beginning both me and my partner brought food for ourselves and TO SHARE (3 full bags in total). It is quite common here (UK) to do.

I couldn't have left as in laws live a couple of hours of driving from us, we were staying over and I was not the driver. The FIL was in charge of the grill due to his own rules. He has splurged on an expensive new one not so long ago and would refuse anyone near it.

We had some premade snacks, but obviously snacks are not really that nutritional or healthy to consume on their own.

They knew about my restrictions and that some of the food is mine and for me due to them. They have known me for nearly a decade and we had plenty of meals and bbq's together and the restrictions were never a problem.

I haven't seen the cooking process as I was in the other part of the garden (which is fairly big) busy with other kids and dogs (we were playing football), so I wasn't aware when the cooking started.

There was plenty of leftovers after, enough to fill the entire fridge, so it was not the case of not having enough food.