'AITA for 'stealing' back expensive toys after my discovery?' UPDATED 3X

"AITA for 'stealing' back expensive toys after my discovery?"

This entire thing is so infuriating and ridiculous, and five of my extended family members are literally angry texting me now. I just don't see how I'm wrong for this, though. I'm not.

My cousin Victoria (28f) and I (29f) grew up playing with these miniature collectable animal figurines from a toy line called My Littlest Pet shop. The toys are still made today so I'm sure a lot of you have heard of them before. Back when we were kids, the toys had a significantly different design to them.

Between the two of us, at that point in time, Victoria and I had to have collected at least 150 of these things. She had more than me, but not by much. We had so many of them, that we often traded them, giving each other the "ugly ones" that we got as Christmas gifts etc.

This was all twenty years ago, and it had taken her and I several years at the time, to grow that collection into what it was, and it undoubtedly cost our extended families an absurd amount of money. I never considered trashing any of those toys, because I knew one day I wanted kids and I wanted to pass all my best stuff along to them. This included all my old Bratz dolls, my video games, and the LPS of course.

I have an almost three-year-old daughter currently, who just recently inherited the majority of my old toys because we've finally reached the point where she doesn't stick everything in her mouth, and I was so excited to see her playing with them that I shared a photo of it on Facebook last week.

My cousin Victoria commented on the photo at some point that evening and said, "Lol miss playing those things with you! When can I come see you and that baby?!" My dumb butt was thrilled by that, I thought she wanted to connect with my daughter and I, so I made plans with her to come visit Friday.

Victoria and I hung out that entire night, talking about our childhood together and playing with my daughter together. She socialized with my fiance, she even had dinner with us. I left that encounter feeling happy and closer with her than I'd felt in years, as we had naturally drifted apart when I left for college a decade ago.

I thought this night would help bring her and I back to that level of closeness. I thought she had felt that way, too. I tried reaching out to her the next day (Saturday) asking when I could see her again, and she said, "my work schedule is full this week, I'll let you know when I'm free!"

So I left her be, anticipating she would do just that. Two day ago, I saw a group on Facebook being suggested to me for buying and selling LPS, and I saw Victoria was a member, so I decided to join it based on that. I assumed she wanted to buy some for herself maybe since playing with them again brought back those memories...

That was my first thought. I quickly realized how much money people were asking for these things USED in the group and I knew Victoria was struggling heavily with student debt (she's a nurse) so I was curious if she was there hoping to find a deal or what.

It was because of this group, that I realized how seriously people still take collecting these toys. I educated myself a lot that morning. Original generation toys are the most sought after, and any animals with purple eyes are considered very rare.

Almost every toy in my collection was an original generation, and it felt kinda cool having something that many would pay tons of money to have. It didn't tempt me to sell them, I kept them all these years so my kid could have them, I wasn't going to sell them, but it was still interesting going through the "high price" list and seeing how many I actually had.

As I'm scrolling through this group and beginning to pull out the toys from the box I keep them in, I see the post. Victoria's post. $250 for a cat. MY CAT. It has a distinctive mark on the eye where the manufacturer messed up the paint, so I knew it was the exact same cat from my collection.

Even if the photo was grainy it was clearly mine, between us there was only one of this particular cat. This b literally stole it from my house, tucked it away in her purse, and was trying to sell it behind my back without mentioning anything about it.

When Victoria and I were just starting our collections, that cat was one of her first ones and she HATED IT. It doesn't have a bobble head, and its tongue sticks out as a feature. She gave me that cat when we were kids, and she never once asked for it back, and I kept it that entire time, because like I said, SHE HATED IT. So it became mine.

Her post said, "Found my old cat and know someone wants him. No low balls, please." I honestly thought seeing red was a figure of speech. I felt so used, so betrayed, I knew then that she didn't actually give a crap about our relationship at all and saw an opportunity to earn money when she saw that picture I shared.

I wanted to call her and scream, but instead, I left the Facebook group and called my fiance. I was actually crying, I know that's silly crying over a toy, but she was so shady about absolutely all of it. I would have talked to her and literally given it to her if she'd been forthright.

If she'd said, "I was wondering if I could have that cat back because I'm really struggling financially and could really use the money!" I would have told her yes without hesitation, but she didn't. She pulled one over on me, and I absolutely was not going to let it go. I was going to get her back in Some way, I just wasn't sure how.

I knew she was not aware that I knew of her actions yet, and I knew in my heart she was going to keep this secret the rest of her life if she had never been caught. Victoria was a pathological liar when we were kids, and it's clear to me she never outgrew it.

My fiance suggested to me over the phone about driving over to her house and simply asking for it back, but knowing her, she'd say something like, "Oh, it's already gone, sorry," when in reality it's just hidden somewhere away from me until she makes the sale.

Remember when I said my cousin is a nurse? Well she's a night shift nurse, and she works every week night. I know this is her schedule, because she told me as much when she came to visit.

So I decided to just wait. Wait until I knew for certain she was at work. Which was last night. I went to her parents house (she lives with them) and told them honestly that Victoria had something of mine and I needed to grab it real quick. My aunt and uncle had no problem letting me go to Victoria's room, which told me they didn't know about the situation with the toy.

I go to her room, and sitting in a pile on her desk beside shipping packages, are several LPS toys she'd taken from my home, not just the cat. She took SIX. Those specific toys may have initially belonged to her, but they were mine. She gave them to me, and I was the one who decided not to trash them over the years.

I grabbed every single one of them, and stuck them in my purse. Hugged my aunt and uncle goodbye, then went to my car. I took a picture with them in my hand, sent it to her, then added, "You're not my family if you think stealing from me is okay. You are not welcome at my house again."

I cried for a minute then collected myself before driving home. I called my fiance on the way and he told me he was so proud of me for standing up for myself. I didn't hear from Victoria the entire night, and the anticipation made me such an anxious mess that I couldn't even sleep really. I knew Victoria was going to be off the clock at 5 a.m. and only then would she see my text.

The phone buzzing is what woke our whole family this morning. The buzzing wouldn't stop, so I turned my phone off and everyone went back to sleep. I honestly wish I had gotten up this morning to address things, because now her brothers and parents are texting me, they're calling me a thief and saying "how could you manipulate us like that yesterday?"

I didn't manipulate anyone, I told them she had something of mine because she did. She's telling me she's taking me to small claims court over this because apparently someone already "bought" it and now she has to refund them.

Y'all. Advice please? I don't have any more energy to deal with this today, I just want to shut down mentally. Does she have an actual case against me in small claims if there are pictures of her as a kid playing with these?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Certain_Tale165 said:

So they were fine with her stealing? You taking back your property is where they draw the line. Go no contact with all of them.

Solid-Musician-8476 said:

She's bluffing about small claims court. tell her you are happy to file a police report. I would block her and anyone that agrees with her.

XELA_38 said:

If she doesn't have the money to move out or refund someone the money they sent her, then she doesn't have the money for small claims court.

WaryScientist said:

NTA - tell her you’re happy to file a police report because she stole from you - you have pics of your daughter playing with the toys and THEN she hit you up and stole. If they were already hers, why would she be selling them immediately after taking them from you?

Wouldn’t she have sold them before instead of waiting so long? If she doesn’t drop the small claims threat, I’d also threaten to submit the police report to her work - they should know they’re employing a thief.

UndeadBuggalo said:

She literally stole from a BABY. That’s low, let them rage and praise their theif you don’t need that.

easypushover said:

That’s craaaazzzy…what a scummy person. I don’t think she has a leg to stand on. She can’t prove they’re hers. Didn’t you share a picture of your child playing with them on Facebook before she made any posts selling “her” old toys? I’d say that’s some proof.

Plus the messages between you where she arrange to come over and the timing of her sale posts. I also think that the likelihood of her actually trying to take you to court is low. I wouldn’t be worried about that. I think the only thing I’d care about is clearing my name as far as being a thief.

Maybe you can arrange to have a conversation with your cousins parents to explain things in person. They might not believe you, but personally I think that the more forthright you are, the more believable you will be. Liars like to hide, honest people have conversations. I hope you can prove your innocence. She is just awful.

FIRST UPDATE:

This bananas. It took me a while to come back and write this, because it took me a while to respond to my family members bombardment. I don't like confrontation but the mama bear in me overrides that, and as many of you in the comments pointed out, she didn't just steal from me, SHE STOLE FROM MY BABY.

And like many of you also commented and suggested, I sent a link for the original thread to my Aunt/Uncle and their sons, and simply told them she was manipulating all of them and it was their choice whether or not to believe me, and my cousins, knowing their sister, jumped on my side without hesitation.

My aunt's texts after reading the post: "Katie I'm horrified and sick beyond belief over this. I'm so sorry. Believe me. She's going to be sorry, too." "I should check to see if her degree is even real, no level is too low apparently when it comes to lying to family."

I love my aunt and had a feeling she'd listen. Honestly, the rift between my aunt and Victoria began when I started telling said aunt everything Victoria was lying about while we were still kids.

It made her parents crack down, and looking at it now, it's why she resents me and never cared to fix this. She never considered growing or getting better as a human being, she just became a better liar and it's gross. Victoria, you're gross.

Her first text to me after seeing my photo: "I already sold it gdi, and you know I've been struggling financially, like I literally sat there and told you how hard my life has been all night and you could have offered to give them back to me.

I sat there hoping you would, but you'll be stingy and keep a million as of these things that your daughter is just going to lose. Like be so real right now, you're going to make a case out of six when you have like 50?!?!?"

Her second text: "You know they're mine and YOU'RE BEING A B----" Her third text: You never offered to give them back over the years and I thought maybe you had finally matured after all this time, having a kid now didn't change anything."

Her fourth text: You would have said no if I'd asked too because that's just the kind of person you are That was just so unnecessarily hateful and untrue and stung probably the most of all her texts.

Her final text: "Court can settle this is you really want to say we aren't family anymore." I understand that she's embarrassed she's been caught, it's why she's hostile. Maybe a small part is her devastation about the ruined relationship but who knows.

My aunt texted this morning and invited me and my daughter over for Monday afternoon and promised Victoria won't be there. She wants to discuss all of this in person. IDK what is going to happen to Victoria, but I should know by then ... Would you guys like a final update on this?? (Hi "Victoria").

Wow I forgot to add her last text after her family flipped. She only sent one. "All you've ever done is ruin my life." I will respond to her eventually. I'll include it if you guys actually want an update.

Here's what people had to say about the first update:

Conscious-Survey7009 said:

Wow she’s nuts! I’m glad you got the toys back and that your aunt is on your side. Make sure they’re locked up safe and she can’t get into your house when you go visit your aunt. I wouldn’t put it past Victoria to try to break in.

Possible-Buffalo-815 said:

I'm glad you stuck up for your kid and got the toys back. I'm also glad that your other family members listened to the truth and realized what was really happening. It's good to know that they're not blinded by loyalty to Victoria and coming down on you in this messy situation.

I'm disgusted that Victoria would steal like that and from family nvm a kid. But it's that last text V sent you that really takes the biscuit "all you've done is ruin my life" she needs to check herself, She did this! You welcomed her into your home and she chose to steal from your child.

You didn't rack up her debts and you didn't make her steal, these are all shitty choices/situations she got herself into. She needs to take accountability, think about her actions ie how they impact others besides herself and do better. Because who wants a lying thief around them? No one. She's heading down a lonely path if she doesn't change.

cassowary32 said:

NTA. She's a nurse, don't they have a code of conduct? She's living with her parents and works as a nurse, which is a well paid position. Where is her money going? She can't give you something 20 years ago then claim they are still hers.

That's not how gifts work. Her texts admit she stole from you, make sure you save them. You probably can't press charges since you got your property back but it might be a good threat to lob her way. Does she steal from other people?

No_Way_4626 said:

I have a cousin who kept saying I ruined her life when my mum and I made all the scarifies so she could have a top class education because her parents couldn’t afford it.

People like that are never getting over themselves and are forever stuck as brats. You could donate a kidney to them and they’d still feel like you never do enough. Best to never talk to her again. She’s toxic and you don’t need that in your life because 100% she talks about you behind your back to everyone.

strywever said:

She’s a nurse, so why is she struggling so much that she has to steal toys? Where is her income going?

rocketmn69_ said:

"No, girl, you ruined your life and continue to do so with your bad choices. Please seek therapy for your delusions."

3bag said:

Can you reference your original Facebook photograph that showed the toys before Victoria came to visit? Especially if the toys you took back were in that original photo? NTA.

SECOND UPDATE:

This final update is being shared with my Uncle's blessing, because a lot of wild details have been revealed to me about Kleptoria and now I'm even more furious on my Aunt and Uncle's behalf.

My daughter and I followed up with my aunt like she requested, and went to their house. My family is tight knit, this wasn't unusual for them to ask me over like some of you were worrying about in the comments, I visit extended family a lot.

My uncle hugged my daughter and I when we arrived, and told us we were always welcome over and he was sorry. They have grandkids from their eldest son, so my daughter was able to play with toys and watch Bluey over there while we talked. First, we discussed the lie she initially told them all.

Her claim was I had stolen these toys behind her back when we were kids, and denied it for years, only for her to see them again with the rest of my other toys in the photos I shared on Facebook. She told them I refused to return the toys, and it was her right to take back stolen property.

My uncle then said that statement was pretty ironic considering how pissed she is that I've reclaimed my stolen property. I asked them how they knew I was the one being honest, and they told me when she was confronted about the reddit post, she went ballistic. Victoria is notorious for becoming hostile when she's caught being dishonest, and they said her reaction was all the proof they needed.

I asked how Victoria was doing. Both of them hesitated at that, like they were deciding who was going to tell the story. My aunt ended up leaving the living room and went to make food.

He told me she was getting kicked out, but it wasn't because of this. This was just the final straw for them, and they were letting the rest of the family know what kind of thief she really was.

It turns out Victoria stole a few thousand from my aunt and uncle first.... In her final years at college. As my uncle explained it, Victoria wanted people to think she was from a rich family that could afford her tuition as well as vacation over the summer, which at that point, she had one year left. I remember the photos on Facebook from this trip, she went with three girls that I don't think even talk to her anymore, and her ex boyfriend.

A lot of money that was meant for college books, boarding, food, etc, was being spent on this boy and other ridiculousness so she could continue this rich person lie, and she was going to keep this lie to herself if they hadn't begun asking questions about the discrepancies.

They told her she could live with them to save her money, so that she could pay them back faster. They made it CLEAR they were going to hold her to it, they weren't going to let her party like she was a free woman until she paid them back, and if she wanted to fix the relationship between them this was her only option. She stole from me because she was trying to get back to the party lifestyle faster.

My aunt came back into the room and asked, "She hasn't texted you, has she? You have every right to press charges against her for this. I told her if she had a brain she would stop digging herself deeper and to leave you alone."

Honestly that made me cry again. I told them I was sorry about all the stress, and that I haven't been sleeping well all week because of this, that I never meant for them to get dragged into it or for it to turn into something like this.

It was a therapeutic visit and I'm glad we cleared the air, but hearing that she's being kicked out doesn't make me feel good after all of this. I just hope she can finally learn and grow after all of this....a life full of burnt bridges sounds pretty lonely to me.

THIRD UPDATE:

I had no desire to press charges and potentially get her fired, I just wanted this situation to go away, but a lot of people pointed out that she could be stealing from patients.

I asked her brothers to look through the selling groups on Facebook she joined since I'm now blocked, and they found a watch and a necklace she sold, that both very likely did not belong to her but there's no definitive proof.

The last thing I need is Vengeful Victoria with nothing left to lose, coming through my backdoor to fight me, because I could see her doing that. This is causing me excessive anxiety but I don't want her preying on hospital patients. I'm making a report with police this afternoon.

Here's what people had to say to OP about the second and third updates:

Spacer_Spiff said:

NTA. You should press charges.

FitzDesign said:

Even if you don’t press charges you should report it to the police so that it’s on record. That way in the future if she keeps going it will catch up to her. NTA.

MeFolly said:

You did not do this to Victoria. Victoria did this to Victoria. A long series of bad decisions and trying to escape the results did this to Victoria.

JPeteQ said:

NTA for any of it. I think you should do whatever is going to give you the most peace. Whether that is pressing charges or letting it all go. I'm sorry that you had to go through it all, but someday it'll be a crazy story you can tell your daughter about your and her LPS toys.

OwlUnique8712 said:

Just remember, she is not being kicked out because of you. She has stolen from her parents, lied, was sneaky. And then she turned around and stole from a child, your child. Her parents are now holding her accountable for all she has done.

She has been self-centered for many years and now it's catching up to her. Everything she is doing is all about how selfish she is. She has to grow up and learn at some point.

Don't feel bad. She did it to herself. If she has any hope of learning from her actions and growing up now is the time. If she has no problem stealing from a child who knows what else she is capable of doing. Good luck with everything.

NoSummer1345 said:

I’d file a police report. She is going to keep stealing until she suffers some real consequences. If she won’t do it for family, maybe a prison sentence or parole officer can persuade her.