I come from a family where heirlooms mean a lot. Our grandmother left us an antique diamond necklace that’s been passed down for generations to the first daughter in the family. Since I’m the only daughter of this generation, it was supposed to come to me.
My brother claimed grandma told him in private that it should go to him instead because he’s “the most responsible.” I didn’t want to cause drama, so I let it go, even though it felt unfair.
Last week, I saw on social media that my brother gave the necklace to his fiancée as an engagement gift. She posted a picture wearing it with the caption, “Feeling like royalty with my new family heirloom.”
I confronted my brother and reminded him the necklace was meant to stay in the family. He said, “She is family now. Don’t be petty.” When I asked for it back, he refused, saying it would ruin their engagement.
I decided to take legal action to get the necklace back. Now my brother is furious and calling me selfish. My parents think I’m overreacting, but some extended family members are on my side, saying he never had the right to give it away.
His fiancée even messaged me, calling me a jealous drama queen and telling me to find my own man to buy me jewelry. The whole thing has caused a family feud, and now my brother and his fiancée are threatening to uninvite me from the wedding. AITA for taking this to court over a necklace that was supposed to be mine?
NTA, also her man did not buy it, he stole it. Dont respond to her while you are suing, but when it is over and you get it back then you can make it clear her loser man did not buy anything for her and stole it. Take him to court.
My wife loved a chest at my mum's house I know it should go to my sister. So I went out and bought one for my wife to pass down.
What an insanely rational thing to do. Good on you, man.
Her man didn't buy it.
He kept it from its rightful owner by claiming to be more responsible (Y T A for not reacting then and there to that) and THEN he gave it to his fiancé without ever having spend a dime on the gift. NTA.
it's unfortunate it's come to this, but you're not wrong. Your brother clearly doesn't understand the responsibility that comes with holding onto a heirloom. By giving it away, he's broken the trust tied to it. NTA.
Wow, I wasn’t expecting this much attention on my post. Thank you to everyone who shared their thoughts and advice. I wanted to give an update because things have escalated and there’s some new context.
First, I talked to my parents about the situation. It turns out my brother didn’t just take the necklace he convinced my dad that grandma told him it was meant for him because she thought a man would be more responsible. My dad, trying to avoid conflict, handed it over without asking questions. So no, my dad didn’t intentionally give it to him, it was manipulation.
I also reached out to other family members who remember grandma’s clear wishes that the necklace was supposed to go to the first daughter. They’re willing to back me up if this goes to court. My dad has also agreed to speak on my behalf in court, clarifying that he never meant to give the necklace away permanently.
As for the legal side, I’ve consulted with my lawyer, who thinks I do have a case. Since there’s no will, it all comes down to proving that the necklace was meant to stay in the maternal line. It’s tricky, but I feel more confident now knowing I have some family members on my side.
My brother and his fiancée, however, have doubled down. They’ve accused me of being jealous, and his fiancée posted another passive-aggressive picture on social media wearing the necklace, captioning it.
"Some things just find their rightful home❤️.” It’s honestly infuriating. At this point, I’m committed to fighting for the necklace, even if it causes more tension in the family. I’ll keep you updated if there are any major developments.
CourseTasty9395 (OP)
I’m not backing down no matter how much they try to twist things. This necklace belongs to me and I’m going to make sure it stays in the family.
Keep fighting. And don’t fall for “you’re breaking the family apart” narrative. Your brother is doing that and he can fix it very easily. I would also partially blame your dad, who should grow a pair and have a serious talk with your brother. It seems your family dynamics is quite odd though.
This all happened because the dad didn't think twice before handing the necklace to him. An item such as that necklace shouldn't be giving away without serious questioning.
…but ask yourself, how come all of you bend to your brothers will? Have things like this happened before?
CourseTasty9395 (OP)
Yes, things like this have happened before and it’s always been my brother getting his way. It’s frustrating but I’m not letting it slide this time.
Your brother is a manipulative POS. Your parents should tell him he’ll be written out of their will if he doesn’t return the necklace to you, saves you going to court. If not, go to court and go NC with him after, he’s not your brother, he’s a snake.
And go LC/NC with anyone in your family who sides with him. For social media, you can just post if you need to respond and say it is an ongoing legal matter and will be discussed in court. Everyone will know what is up then.
Hi everyone, here’s the latest update. My court date is set for the 27th and I’ve been doing everything I can to prepare. Honestly this whole process has been so overwhelming emotionally, mentally and financially.
I never expected that standing up for what’s right would come with such a heavy price. I’ve had to dip into my savings to cover legal fees which has been stressful but I can’t back down now.
The good news is my dad has agreed to testify on my behalf. He’s been reflecting on everything and realizes now that my brother manipulated him by claiming that grandma wanted him to have the necklace.
My aunt is also supporting me and has shared specific moments where grandma talked about how the necklace was supposed to go to me. Having them both on my side is giving me hope.
Meanwhile my brother and his fiancée are making things even messier. She actually brought the necklace to a family dinner recently wearing it like a trophy. She didn’t say anything directly but the way she was flaunting it felt like a calculated move to provoke me.
My mom told me "to just let it go" after that incident but how can I when it’s so clear they’re doing this to spite me. I don’t know, sometimes it feels like my mom is supporting my brother. She’s been really quiet about all of this.
The emotional toll of this fight has been huge but I’m trying to stay strong. This isn’t just about the necklace it’s about honoring my grandmother’s wishes and standing up for myself in a family that has always prioritized my brother over me.
Thank you to everyone who’s been supporting me here. Your encouragement has been such a lifeline during this difficult time. I’ll update you all after the court date on the 27th.
CourseTasty9395 (OP)
Honestly I didn’t expect things to get this intense. It’s like every time I think I’m making progress, something else comes up. Still shocked by how quiet my mom’s been about it all. I’ll keep you all posted after the court date on the 27th fingers crossed!
Your mom (parents actually) sucks for not standing up to you and not asking you POS brother and fiancé to leave when she showed up flaunting it.
Why do your father and mother allow him to continue acting this way? Flaunting the necklace at a family dinner in the middle of a lawsuit? Maybe if they put their foot down and didn’t allow him to participate in family gatherings with out returning the necklace to its rightful owner or at least being respectful about it they would be more pressured to give up the necklace.
If you end up with it back though, PLEASE wear it all the time in front of her and post pictures with snooty captions similar to hers about it REALLY finding its rightful home.
You’re doing the right thing standing up for yourself, especially since your grandma’s wishes are clear. It’s super messed up that they’re flaunting it like that, but you’ve got your dad and aunt backing you, so keep pushing! It’s tough, but you’ve got this! Stay strong! 💪
Honestly, your family needs to respect your grandma’s wishes. It’s so messed up that your brother and his fiancée are flaunting the necklace like that. If it was meant for you, then it’s YOURS. It’s not just about the necklace, it’s about standing up for what’s right and showing your worth. Keep fighting for yourself! You got this!