Teacher jokingly calls her student 'creepy'; staff starts taking sides. AITA?

When this preschool teacher is worried she may have said something inappropriate, she asks the internet:

"AITA for calling one of my students creepy?"

So I’m a preschool teacher and one of my students has very light brown/hazel eyes and very dark skin. He always gets compliments on his eyes so I’m certain it isn’t an insecurity or anything.

The other day I was by myself in the classroom while the kids were playing and when I turned around I saw his creepy little eyes staring at me. And it isn’t just the eye color, he also widens his eyes for some reason (maybe to show them off?). I was startled and joked to him “don’t stare at me with those creepy eyes”.

He didn’t take it as an issue but one of my other students heard and took it as me saying a “bad word” and started running around yelling “Ms. T said a bad word!”. Now the story is all twisted and the staff think I called him creepy because of his eye color and complexion combination. Also it is not a racial thing at all, almost half of my students are of color. Other staff say it's not a big deal. I agree

I am having a meeting with his parents about the issue because it got blown out of proportion and I want to defend myself before my name gets tarnished. Wish me luck. AITA?

Let's see what readers thought.

ousem writes:

YTA. There are some words you just don't use with children, especially to describe a part of their body. Well done to your little student who called you out on what you said. You're a teacher and you know all the more how children distort everything. Don't use any more ambiguous words around them.

factfic writes:

NTA. Maybe wrong choice of words, but it doesn't sound racially motivated to me. Sounds like the parents want to make a big deal about it.

psychol writes:

YTA. I'm not even going to ask why you think they're creepy if it's not the complexion + eye color combo, because it doesn't matter. He's got the body he's got, and you're insulting hiim for it. The kid's eyes are his eyes. Too bad you think they're creepy, but that's a you problem.

Btw, it also doesn't matter that he's a kid instead of an adult, because calling someone creepy for a physical feature they can't control is AH behaviour at any age. Suppose a co-worker had light hazel eyes.

Would you want him to wear contact lenses for your comfort? (I'm getting the sense that yes, actually. But, for the avoidance of doubt, that's wrong. Jeez.)

(Yes, he widens his eyes to show them off! He's been complimented on them. Kids do things that get them positive feedback. Your implication that this is somehow vain or wrong is very strange;

if kids didn't respond to positive feedback by doing more of the thing that gets them praise, then they'd remain untoilet-trained psychopaths their entire lives.)

freaty writes:

YTA. What is wrong with you?? Why on earth would you use that word to describe a body part of a child?

Yeah you did say a bad word. You are a teacher, why are demonstrating bad behavior for the other kids to imitate? Regardless if he outwardly took it as an issue, you’re the adult and know you are wrong.

Of course the other adults see it as a racial thing because why on earth would you find his skin complexion/eye color combo creepy?

Unless you find it odd because you aren’t used to seeing it, or don’t think the combo are supposed to be together, which is why you find it creepy, If he had a lighter complexion with light eyes, you wouldn’t have discomfort. It would be normal to you. It’s an underlying racial issue, not outwardly racist, but doesn’t make it any better.

Having other children of color as students are irrelevant. It’s like saying, “I can’t be racist, I have poc employees.” Stating this as a reason for not being racist is invalid in every occasion because poc are not a monolith. We do not look nor act the same.

The only reason I ever find a child “creepy” is in movies or shows, when it’s intended to be such. It’s weird that you think this is blown out of proportion when your actions can or will have detrimental effects.

I remember being in 1st grade and having a teacher examine my hair because she thought it was “fake hair” Her saying this in front of my peers led to my hair being pulled constantly because her lack of respect towards me made the other kids think it was okay to show me the same regard.

Idk if you are fit to be a teacher if you are viewing kids negatively and behaving this way.