Teacher switches student's table without mother's permission. AITA?

"AITA for moving a student to a different table without asking for permission from his mother?"

I am an elementary school teacher. One of my students, who we’ll call Carson, is 6. Recently, I noticed he was showing signs of being on the autism spectrum. Carson avoids eye contact, flaps his hands when anxious, gets overwhelmed in noisy situations.

However, what really stuck out to me was the trouble he has when it comes to my classroom’s fluorescent lighting. Some of the other kids have teased him because of these behaviors.

I brought this up during a parent-teacher conference with his mom. I explained that I thought Carson might need some accommodations to thrive, especially around sensory stuff. She got very defensive and insisted that Carson is “normal” and “not like Trevor,” his 9 year old brother who’s in a special program because he is nonverbal and has autism.

I moved Carson to a table in a corner of the room where the overhead lights could be off, and I provided a lamp for him to work under. Since then, he’s been much calmer, focused, and finally genuinely happy at school.

When his mom found out, she sent an angry email demanding that Carson be moved back to his original spot. She insists he has no issues and refuses to accept that he needs this accommodation. I explained that he can only get his work done in the quieter, dimmer space, but she’s refusing to listen and says I’m “singling him out unnecessarily” and that “nothing is wrong with him."

She insists that I should have asked for permission first, but because of how dismissive she was of my other recommendations, I didn’t go that route. I’m just trying to help him succeed and feel comfortable at school, but his mom thinks I’m overstepping. AITA?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Stunning-Field2011 said:

NTA - it’s your classroom, you’re the teacher and you decide who sits where, why and when not the parents.

Megopoly said:

NTA. As a parent I feel it's your classroom and you should run it in whatever way works best for you and the students as a whole. On a personal note, I'm not on the spectrum but got migraines regularly as a tween/teen. Florescent lights exacerbated the problem. I'd have done much better in school and showed up more often if I'd had the option to use a lamp instead.

NoAppointment3062 said:

NTA. As someone whose autism symptoms went either unnoticed or ignored as a child, thank you for doing what you can to help that kid. You're the best kind of teacher and he will likely remember you helping him and be beyond grateful when he is older.

TrainerHonest2695 said:

NTA. I wonder if she found out about the seating change because she realized he’s happier and his assignments and grades are better. As the teacher, it’s your right and responsibility to do what’s necessary to keep the whole classroom functioning as best as possible for ALL the students’ benefit, so if he’s no longer being disruptive, that’s a bonus.

witx said:

NTA. Document everything up to this point. Let your principal know what’s going on. Keep going as you are. When she inevitably goes to the principal he/ she will be prepared. Good for you for advocating for your student.

xxxdee said:

NTA. It breaks my heart that this kid’s mom’s ego is setting him up for failure. My BF’s ex has a similar attitude about their shared son, even though there are so many tell tale signs of sensory issues with him.