'AITA for telling friends and family I’m broke when they need money?'

"AITA for telling friends and family I’m broke when they need money?"

I (50M) had several instances in my 20s where friends and family members borrowed money from me. They either never paid it back or I had to really pressure them for the money.

Problem is everyone knew I make decent money, and knew I was a habitual saver. So when they got hard up, they’d come to me like an ATM machine. They’d be like “come on man, I know you got the money!” Then I’d get the hard luck sob story followed by “I’ll pay you back when I get…”

So I opened up a new bank account. I only put $20 in savings (the minimum required by this bank. Then I’d put enough in the checking for bills, groceries and spend it that day so that account only had a few bucks left.

When folks would hit me up for money I’d be like “sorry, I’d like to help you out but money’s tight right now?” They’d call BS and I’d log into that account and show them. They’d go away all dejected.

After a few years of this, people started asking where my money went. Obviously I’m not going to tell them the truth (savings, HYSA, investments). So I’d say “beer” or “strip club” or “casino”. And not only did they believe me (because that’s what they did), but by the 2010s they were lecturing me about not wasting my money!

Anyway in the 2010s I got married and filled my wife in on the situation. She thought it was funny. Anyway my sister came over for Halloween and made some comment about how glad she was that I’d learned to be more responsible with money. My wife started laughing and spilled the beans.

My sister confronted me and I confirmed it was true. Then I told her I wasn’t 20 anymore and if she hit me up for money the answer was “no!” She told the rest of the family. Some think it’s hilarious, but others think I’m a tight wadded ahole. Some have asked me how much I have, and I tell them “none of your business.” So, AITA?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

kibbiepdx said:

NTA but your sister is for telling everyone.

PDK112 said:

NTA. Funny how many learned to survive without your help.

Dependent-Ad-9935 said:

NTA. It’s not your responsibility to bankroll them. It’s hilarious.

BlondDee1970 said:

NTA. Your finances aren't anyone's business but your own. Period.

Free-Place-3930 said:

NTA. But damn, that wife got a big dumb mouth, huh. This is why they say loose lips sink ships. She’s the type to sink a destroyer with hundreds or souls on it.

Unlucky-Clock5230 said:

NTA, you are just being a huge dummy. "repeat after me: "I'm sorry, no; I don't lend money." Your wishy-washy attitude is what keeps them asking. If doesn't matter how much you may or may not have, it is not their business to even ask.

If they insist, stop making excuses, stop acting like you have something to apologize for, and just say no and get offended if they don't drop it.