'AITA for telling my husband no to cake smashing on our son's first birthday?' UPDATED
"AITA for telling my husband no to cake smashing?"
My son's 1st birthday is on Saturday and to keep it short my husband is really adamant about pushing the baby's face into the cake. I am super against this because for one the baby may laugh but he might also cry. Also, It's his birthday and we shouldn't be doing anything that he may not enjoy.
He's pretty sensitive (as babies are) and I don't want him to start crying on his birthday. My husband is Mexican and according to him it is a tradition his family does every birthday but he himself told me he ALWAYS hated it as a kid and it made him angry.
I get it's a family tradition but it's not something I'm comfortable with and I don't understand what's so funny about it. However, my son isn't just mine and technically this is part of his family's tradition on his father's side so Idk. I told him if he does do it, I will be angry and that he needs to tell his family that they aren't allowed to do it themselves either.
I'm telling him again tonight to remind him no because I heard him talking about buying two cakes (a small one for just the baby) and I don't understand why we would do that unless he was going to try. Any advice on how to talk this over again will help unless I'm just being a jerk and making a big deal of nothing.
The internet did not hold back one bit.
divwido wrote:
He always hated it, yet he wants to do that to a baby??? I'm sorry, is he sick in the head? how can he possibly justify doing what he hated having done to him????
OP responded:
I guess because he won't remember it probably? I also think because his family is pressing it. My FIL finds it hilarious
Psychological_Name28 wrote:
Oh! If that’s the case, smash it into FIL’s face 🎂💥👨🦰.
divwido wrote:
That's what I thought too! If it's so funny, turn the tables on the father in law. Let's see how funny it is now. Have you suggested to your husband that one day he might find his son hates his guts because of this? This is the kind of thing that festers until your child announces that they want absolutely nothing to do with you ever again.
OP responded:
I didn't mention it but I am going to mention how he also hated it! Why would we do something even HE didn't like.
JacOfAllTrades wrote:
What if you stand behind your son with a cupcake in your hand, and if anyone tries to sneak up on your baby you cupcake slap them. Bonus points if you can do it without breaking song.
Five days later, OP shared an update.
Sorry for the late update.
Anyways to keep it short the party went okay for the most part! As for the cake face smashing?
My husband shut it down immediately!
We let the baby have his own cake and he went at it pretty gently honestly, were were expecting chaos but it was very anticlimactic lol
There WERE some family members (you can guess who) who were chanting "push his face in the cake!" Over and over. Thankfully, hubby shot them a glare and they shut up.
We stayed with him the entire time while everyone ate the cake and my mom made sure to box any leftovers up so no face smashing was seen today!! Just a really sweet birthday party.
Thank you everyone for the advice!!! I'm so glad things turned out well.
The internet was glad to hear the update.
crafty_special_7052 wrote:
Glad it all worked out. I honestly hate the whole smashing someone’s face in cake tradition. It’s not fun for the person getting their face in cake at all. Like unless the person agrees to it before hand no one should be smashing another’s person face into cake. I’ve seen videos of girls who got dolled up for their birthday and they get cake smashed into their face and just completely ruin their make up and hair.
Starglass8859 wrote:
Yay for ending toxic family traditions!! Yay for protecting your child from the trauma you experienced and doing better for them. Definitely in future years turn it on anyone who thinks it’s a fun tradition - cupcakes to smash into the adult faces since they think it’s such a fun thing to do.
Dana07620 wrote:
"There WERE some family members (you can guess who) who were chanting "push his face in the cake!" Over and over."
Some people are real AHs. Would have served them right if you pulled at a cheap cake and let them experience it. I could just imagine you and husband both with cakes simultaneously doing it.
Bearliz wrote:
It's awesome of your hubby to step up and shut his family down.
vegasbywayofLA wrote:
I still was hoping for them to smash FIL with cake. If I remember correctly, he was usually the instigator.
DaniCapsFan wrote:
I'm glad your husband saw sense. Pushing an adult's face in the cake is bad enough, but an infant? Oh, no. Hell no. Can we put an end to pushing people's faces in cakes? It's rude and could cause injuries.