'AITA for telling my husband our daughter isn't his and being upset my family won't help me get him back?'
"AITA for telling my husband our daughter isn't his and being upset my family won't help me get him back?"
I told my husband our daughter wasn't his and now he's treating me like I'm a stranger. It happened three weeks ago. We were fighting about something stupid, I don't even remember what, and he said I never take responsibility for anything.
That's when I snapped. I told him maybe if he knew the truth about our daughter he'd understand why I've been so distant. He went completely still. "What did you just say?"
I couldn't take it back. The words were already out there. So I told him everything. The affair seven years ago. The guy from work. How I wasn't sure about the timing but I suspected. How I never got a paternity test because I was too scared.
My husband just stared at me. Then he walked out of the room and I heard him throwing up in the bathroom. He didn't come home that night. Or the next three nights.
When he finally showed up, it was with two men in suits. His lawyer and a process server. Divorce papers. Immediate separation. Custody evaluation pending paternity results.
I called him crying. He blocked my number. I went to his mom's house because I knew he was staying there. She opened the door, looked at me like I was trash, and said her son doesn't live there anymore and she has no idea where he is.
My family found out because I was a mess and told my sister. Big mistake. My mom came over and lectured me for an hour about how I need to convince him to stay. "You made a mistake but he needs to be a man and forgive you. That little girl needs her father."
I tried to explain that he might not be her father. My mom lost it. "You don't know that for sure. He raised her for six years. He IS her father. Tell him to stop being selfish and think about his daughter."
My dad was worse. He called my husband directly, got through somehow before the number change, and told him he was acting like a child. That real men don't abandon their families over old mistakes. That I deserved a second chance.
My husband sent a text to my dad. Only text anyone got from him. It said: "I'm not abandoning my family. She destroyed it. And if that child isn't mine, I'm not her father. I'm a man who married a liar."
Then he changed his number. My family is furious with him. My brother keeps saying he's going to "talk some sense" into him but nobody knows where he is. He moved out of his mom's place. Quit his job. Vanished.
Meanwhile, I'm getting paternity test orders from his lawyer. The results come back next week. I'm terrified. If she's not his, I lose everything. He'll pay nothing. He'll disappear completely.
If she is his, he'll still divorce me but at least he'll have to see me during custody exchanges. The worst part is everyone feels sorry for him. His friends. His family. Even some of our mutual friends who I thought would support me. They're all on his side.
My family keeps telling me he's being dramatic. That I should show up at his lawyer's office and demand to talk to him face to face. That he owes me a conversation after six years of marriage. But he doesn't owe me anything. I know that now.
I ruined everything and everyone treats him like the victim while treating me like the villain. My own daughter asks where daddy is and I don't know what to tell her. She might not even be his daughter. Am I wrong for thinking my family should be supporting me instead of making this worse?