'AITA for telling my mom I don’t want her in the delivery room?'
"AITA for telling my mom I don’t want her in the delivery room?"
I’m 27F and currently 8 months pregnant with my first baby. My mom (54F) has been super involved since day one, which I appreciated at first. She helped me with appointments, gave me advice, and was genuinely excited to be a grandma.
But lately, it’s been getting a bit overwhelming. She comments on everything I eat, tells me what kind of birth I should have, and even argues with my boyfriend (28M) about how things should be done.
I told her recently that I only want my boyfriend in the delivery room. I want it to be a calm, private moment between us. My mom got really hurt and said I’m “pushing her away” and that she “has a right to be there” since she’s my mom. She’s been giving me the cold shoulder ever since and told some of my relatives, who are now calling me ungrateful.
I honestly don’t mean to hurt her, I just want to feel comfortable during labor. But now I feel guilty because I know she’s excited to be there. AITA for not wanting my mom in the delivery room?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Traditional-Carob440 said:
Your birthing experience, your choice. Simple as that.
SitcomKid411 said:
NTA. Your birth your rules. There is no “right to be on birth watch." Talk to your doctor and staff about your requests. You are the decider. Separately, try to have a calm conversation with your mom. Public so she doesn’t flip and explain what you need from her so that her grandma moment doesn’t destroy your relationship with her.
trashycajun said:
Watching birth isn’t a right. Clean drinking water and food is a right. If you want to argue semantics there ya go.
ImaginationMurky7605 said:
NTA. This is your pregnancy, your birth, your baby. Your mom probably means well but is overstepping her boundaries and needs to respect your decision.
Ok_Solution5558 said:
Oh Lord, NTA! I had to have the nurses bar both my mother and mother-in-law from L&D. (not the last hospital room my Mom had to be barred from - don't get me wrong, she was a kind and loving woman. But had a way of making my blood pressure sky-rocket...this is your show, no one else's.
GodofBoody said:
NTA 1000% lol. She gave birth before, she should understand you have limits and boundaries. Does she believe she earned this for all her help? Thats weird. And for your family members complaining, ask if you and your husband can come and watch when they give birth, that'll shut them up.