Bride disinvites sister because 'the wedding colors clash with her complexion.' AITA?
"AITA for uninviting my sister from my wedding after she demanded I change my wedding colors because they 'clash' with her complexion?"
I (28F) am getting married to the love of my life (30M) in six months. We've been planning our dream wedding for over a year, and everything was going smoothly until recently.
My older sister, Sarah (32F), has always been... particular. She's very into aesthetics and her personal image. She's also used to getting her way. When we were kids, she was always the "golden child," and my parents rarely told her no.
We're not super close, but we're on decent terms. I asked her to be a bridesmaid, and she accepted. I was happy to have her be a part of my special day. We decided on a color scheme of dusty rose and sage green for our wedding.
I love these colors, and they fit perfectly with our outdoor, garden-themed venue. I sent out a mood board to the bridal party, including Sarah, to give them an idea of the overall vibe.
A few days later, Sarah called me, practically in tears. She said the colors were "horrendous" and would "completely wash her out." She has olive skin and dark hair, and apparently, these colors are her "worst nightmare." She demanded I change the entire wedding color scheme to something that would "complement her better," like jewel tones.
I was shocked. I tried to explain that we had already put down deposits based on these colors, and it was way too late to change everything. I also reminded her that the wedding is about me and my fiancé, not her.
She went ballistic, accused me of being selfish and inconsiderate, and said I was "ruining her experience." She even threatened not to come if I didn't change the colors.
After a few days of her relentless pressure and guilt-tripping, I finally snapped. I told her that if she was that unhappy with the colors, then maybe it was best if she didn't come at all. I uninvited her from the wedding and the bridal party.
Now, my parents are furious. They're saying I'm overreacting and being a "bridezilla." They're accusing me of ruining the family over something as trivial as wedding colors.
Some of my extended family are also taking her side, saying I should be more accommodating. My fiancé supports my decision, but I'm starting to feel incredibly guilty. I'm also heartbroken that this is causing such a huge rift in my family.
Maybe I should have tried harder to make my sister happy, even if it meant changing my vision. So, internet, AITA for uninviting my sister from my wedding because she demanded I change my wedding colors to suit her complexion?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
NTA. It’s your wedding, not her fashion show. Changing the colors because she doesn’t like how she’ll look is selfish and unreasonable, especially with deposits already made. Her reaction was over the top, and uninviting her was fair if she couldn't support you without making it about herself. Focus on your big day, you deserve it.
"They're accusing me of ruining the family over something as trivial as wedding colors."
The sister's reaction over something "as trivial as wedding colors" was the thing that threatened to ruin the wedding. Seriously, WHO asks the bride/groom to change the wedding colors to shades more flattering to them?!?!! WHO DOES THAT?!?!?!!! 🤬
Yeah, tell the flying monkeys that if wedding colors are so trivial, why should Sarah be kicking up such a fuss over them?
NTA: This is your wedding. It’s also a chance to start a new family with your husband who supports you. Sadly it might be time to trim the weeds.
NTA You are starting a new phase of your life, do it on your terms and stop letting your family's dysfunction shadow your life. Tell your parents that they have always favored your sister and she's now a 32-year old spoiled brat who thinks your wedding should be all about her. Do not back down, your life will be the better for it.
Honestly, your sister is wild for making it about her. It's your wedding, not hers. You tried to explain and she didn't listen, so I think you did what you had to do. Family's gonna have their drama, but you're the one who's gotta be happy with how your day turns out. Don't let her steal your spotlight. Keep doing you! 💅💖
NTA - and if your family consider wedding colours trivial then they should be telling your sister to suck it up for something "trivial". Additionally. She's the bridesmaid. Not the bride. She doesn't get to have anything her way to be honest. This day is for you and your soon to be husband. It is absolutely nothing to do with her.
NTA - This is so completely weird and random, it has to be true. And please explain to everyone why your sister threw a tantrum, and if they still support her insane demands, they can be uninvited also.
NTA- I dress in a gothic fashion most of the time or at least some form of witchy vibe. I wear black clothes with heavy dramatic make up.... it's a big part of who I am and I love that about myself. I have a look that is recognisably me.
If I was a bridesmaid and they wanted me to wear a dusty rose dress with rose gold eyeshadow and a nude lipstick I would be happy to do so... put me in whatever as long as it physically fits I will wear it.
Worst case if I have to buy it myself I will work out a way to dye it after the wedding or donate it to a friend who will get use out of it since I know a lot of people who DIY outfits themself... it's not that big of a deal.