'AITA for walking my friends’ under-exercised dog more than they usually do?' 'They had to call the vet.'

"AITA for walking my friends’ under-exercised dog more than they usually do – which led to vet costs and now drama?"

So…this one’s been sitting heavy on me, and I’d love to get an outside perspective. My friends (let’s call them J and P) adopted a 2-year-old rescue dog (I'll call him B) about three months ago. Before that, B had lived in a basement with little to no stimulation.

He’s a super sweet dog but noticeably under-exercised: they walk him about 1–2 km per day and he’s alone for 6–8 hours daily. He often seems restless, whiny, overly excited around other dogs – classic signs of under-stimulation, IMO.

I took care of B for a weekend while they were away. During that time, I gave him more attention and longer walks – one day, we covered about 10 km total (spread out through the day). He was noticeably calmer, more relaxed, and just generally seemed happier. I honestly felt like he needed that.

When I returned him, he was fine. The next day, they messaged me saying he had “hip pain” and that they had to call a vet. I felt awful – but also a bit confused, because he hadn’t shown any signs of discomfort while with me, and I did pace things gently. The vet said there was nothing structurally wrong, maybe a strain or muscle soreness, and gave them painkillers.

We later had a conversation where I calmly expressed that I’d step back from walking or looking after B to avoid overstepping again, and to respect their way of handling things – even though I still strongly feel that the dog needs more stimulation. The talk started off calm but escalated when J suddenly accused me of not wanting to pay the vet bill.

That threw me off because – at that point – the bill hadn’t even come up in our conversation. It genuinely hadn’t been discussed yet, not because I was avoiding it, but because we hadn’t gotten there. I would have gladly offered to help if it had been addressed normally.

After that I sent a message offering to pay part of the bill, asking for the receipt, and reiterating that the friendship matters to me. P later replied, saying emotions were high, J’s under a lot of stress, and that J needs time.

I get that life is hard, and I don’t want to be insensitive. But I still feel a bit hurt and misunderstood. I never meant to overstep. I really cared about B, and just wanted to give him what I thought he was missing.

So…AITA for walking their dog significantly more than they do, trying to do the right thing – and now stepping back after being accused of not wanting to pay, even though we hadn't gotten to that part of the conversation yet?

Here's what people had to say to OP about this one:

Kitchu22 said:

As someone in rescue/rehab, YTA if you knew the dog’s current exercise routine and deliberately exceeded it by such a significant amount because you wanted to make some kind of point that you think you know better than their owners. “I never meant to overstep” girl, be so for real, your actions were very deliberately an overstep.

Just because a dog is tired doesn’t mean that they are enriched or happy, and you ultimately caused them an injury. You could have easily introduced some training, sniffy games, or foraging opportunities if you felt that they needed more...

Instead you took a dog used to 1-2kms of walks max and took them on 10kms in one day, that’s super irresponsible, and I am glad you will not be providing care for this poor dog in future.

Hari_om_tat_sat said:

My husband’s colleague offered to dog-sit while we went to visit my family abroad for 3 weeks. We were happy to hear that he took our dog out on his nightly runs. What he didn’t tell us was that he was training for a marathon. When we got our dog back, he was limping.

Our poor pup was in distress. We took him to the vet & discovered that he had torn his ACL in both hind legs. It cost $3,000 for surgery on one leg and a 10 week recovery period.

YTA for thinking you know their dog’s needs better than your friends. You abruptly increased the dog’s exercise 5-fold over a single weekend, no building up to it, no preparation. Your carelessness caused the dog pain and possible injury.

Thank goodness it was only for a weekend so the injury didn’t get aggravated and was able to heal with rest and a mild intervention — not like my poor dog who was over-exercised to the point of tearing his ligaments. Then to top it off, you didn’t immediately offer to split the vet bill once you heard that your friends had to take him there. And you still think you’re right!

AriasK said:

YTA 10KM is a HUGE difference from what the dog is used to. Dogs are really good at keeping up because they are easily excited and loyal. They don't want to be left behind. They often ignore pain because they are having a good time.

Dog or human, anyone who suddenly does a walk or run of that distance without building up their endurance will injure themselves. The injuries often show up a day or two later. Rule of thumb is to add on 10% distance per week to build up without injury.

Jubilantly said:

YTA animals as with people need a slow increase when exercising more if they've had reduced levels of physical activity. 1 - 2 km to 10 km is 5 - 10x increase. Pup may not have had the muscle strength for it. 3 months of any new relationship including pets is still a learning period for all parties. As for J's response, your actions (without their input on the change regardless of good intentions) caused harm to the newest member of their family.

Secretly_S41ty said:

Yta. You injured that dog, because you thought you knew better than the people who love and care for him every day. You didn't even notice he was straining himself to keep up with you. And you still think you were right! The arrogance of this post is astounding.

You were pet sitting for free which is kind, and you obviously meant well, but if it was me I would pay the vet bill since you did screw up here and you do want to stay friends. There's a subset of animal lovers who delude themselves into thinking they understand animals on a deeper level than everyone else including their owners. It's insufferable, please stop doing it.

Kagome23 said:

YTA you took it upon yourself to make this change for someone else's pet, went way overboard with it and hurt the poor dog! You increased how much the dog was walked by SEVERAL MILES all in one go. That's ridiculous. I'd be livid