'AITA for wanting to break up with my GF for pulling a pregnancy prank on me?'
"AITA (25m) for wanting to break up with my (26f) gf for pulling a pregnancy prank on me?"
I’m (25m) in an LDR with my gf (26f) for a year now. Today, I was in the shower with her on FaceTime and she started talking about her belly and that there’s a baby in it. I thought she was joking for the first 20 minutes, and I asked her to stop joking about that 6-7 times and she didn’t so I hung up the phone.
She calls me back 5 minutes later and I answered. She said in “all seriousness, just take a few deep breaths and look at the photo I just sent you.” I looked and it was an ultrasound of a 2 weeks pregnancy. She even typed her name on the bottom right.
I didn’t believe her still but she made up a whole story about how her last period was just spotting and she went to a doctor 4 weeks ago but was comprehending it herself before telling me. She continued this for another hour and was saying how she wanted to have the baby and I told her I can’t have a kid. But she just kept this weird evil smile on her face and said she can’t kill a living thing.
Telling me to go look again and asked, “how are you going to k#$l that?” I was literally in shock in a realization that I’m going to have a kid in this world and I won’t be there to father it. That really put me in a different mental or emotional state. Then she finally hinted that she’s not actually pregnant and started laughing. I hung up the phone. Haven’t talked to her in a couple hours.
Actually thinking about ending things with here because 1) that’s a messed up prank. 2) while thinking that I’m going to have a kid, I realized that her and I have nothing in common and the thought of raising a kid with her and being with her forever didn’t really excite me.
Like I wouldn’t be able to go fishing with her and my kid because she doesn’t like fishing. Or anything really out in nature. Something I really want to do with my kid. I would really like to do that stuff with my wife as well. AITA?
The internet did not hold back one bit.
bookworm-1960 wrote:
NTA. If she actually thinks that kind of thing is funny, she has something seriously wrong with her. It's just cruel and you would be getter off without her.
Find someone that likes to do things you do. There are plenty of women out there that like camping, hiking, fishing, and the like.
AnwenofArda responded:
YES! A huge red flag is the gf not showing any interest in OP’s hobbies. I have gone on a few dates with a guy recently and I was shocked when he agreed to all my suggestions unless busy.
I’m talking things from hiking, seeing a movie, tolerating my ability to be in a mall for hours flitting around…simply because he likes me I think he in turn likes my quirks that many people find annoying. Like my rambling and endless ability to not take most things seriously.
OP do not settle for a woman who isn’t willing to care about (or even tolerate! Fish gross me out but if someone I was interested in loved to fish I’d try and brave it lol) you for who you are! Do not underestimate how important it is to have commonalities with a partner. Not necessarily in hobbies, but also in emotional maturity. As in compromise is essential.
OP responded:
Ya’ll aren’t wrong. I’m able to see it from the outside now. Nobody is perfect, but crossing the line too many times is enough.
ProudPail wrote:
I won't even consider this a difficult decision at current point, situation is crystal now.
New_Standard_8609 responded:
“Difficult” to soften the blow, but I highly suspect there will be crazy drama when he tells her.
OP responded:
There was lots of drama. Almost made me want to be with her still. Hard to stay strong when you’re looking at the person you love cry about not being with you when you can just say never mind and make her happy again.
ChildfreeAtheist1024 wrote:
NTA. That's messed up.
But it sounds like you weren't compatible before this. I think lack of compatibility, pregnancy prank, either one is a valid reason to break up with someone.
OP responded:
It’s less about the prank. I’m not mad about that. I can forgive and forget. She could’ve worked on things as well. I just think there’s only so much a person can change and a relationship that constantly needs work is a stressful one.
BasicRabbit4 wrote:
NTA. Her prank forced you to reevaluate your relationship, and you realized you aren't that into her. It's actually kinder if you break up and don't waste anymore of her time.
OP responded:
Yes. At the end of the day. It’s not only for me. It’s for her too.
Patient_Process1112 wrote:
The part where she repeatedly made you look at a picture of a f-tus while putting you through the emotional stress of choosing to kill it is SO FAR BEYOND A JOKE.
It's twisted and manipulative and she should be left for that alone, even without the follow-on realizations. But I do love a good FAFO! I agree that you should just text her your bullet point number 2 (using "you" in place of "her").
Justdraft6064 wrote:
I hope you've already told her you're done, that's some f#$%ed up shit.
The jokes on her for making you also realise she's not the one. Nice and easy since it's already long distance ;)
OP responded:
Yeah. I could see myself forgiving her for the prank alone if she didn’t take it so far. But when I was believing her for nearly an hour, I had all the thoughts as if I was actually going to be a father. Prank did me a favor.
stickylarue wrote:
I’d called it more of an emotionally manipulative stunt then a prank. A prank is a mischievous act. What she did was play with your emotions to satisfy her own ego.
OP responded:
Can you explain how this could satisfy someone’s ego?