'AITA for wanting to tell my boyfriend’s mom that her son has been stealing from my business?'

"AITA for wanting to tell my boyfriend’s mom that her son has been stealing from my business?"

I (25F) am really struggling with something in my relationship with my boyfriend (28M), and I feel like I have no one to talk to about it. He has been taking money from my small business without asking. The first time it happened, he told me he needed to move the money into his account for house expenses, but I later found out he just spent it.

I stayed quiet to keep the peace, and after about a month he eventually put the money back. Before any of this, I suggested he get a second job since we have been talking about buying a house. He refused and said he would never do that, so I dropped it.

Later, I invited him to help me with my business, which is making bouquets, and I offered to split profits with him. Recently I discovered he had taken all of the money, both his share and mine, without telling me. When I confronted him, he got defensive, said he needed it for the house, and was rude about it. The only reason I even noticed was because the numbers were not adding up.

I had already asked him not to use the money without permission, but he brushed it off and laughed like it was not serious. Now he has done it more than once, and when I brought it up again, he showed no remorse and started giving me the silent treatment.

What hurts the most is that if he had simply asked me, I would have lent him the money. Instead, he is sneaky, dismissive, and makes me feel like I am wrong for questioning him.

I have not told anyone about this, not even my parents, because I feel embarrassed and ashamed. But part of me really wants to call his mom and explain what has been happening, hoping she might talk some sense into him. The problem is that I know he will see it as me embarrassing him or being disrespectful by involving her in what he calls private matters.

PS: The first time he took money(he asked after already taking it), he paid it back within a month. The second time, he paid it back within 48 hours after I hammered on about it. He’s essentially using my business as some sort credit card for his personal life without my permission.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

No_Carrot_5027 said:

Get an account in your name ONLY! Do not tell him anything about it. Do not lend him anything, he is taking big advantage of you. Do not tell his mom, he’s not a little boy, any longer.

OnefortheMonkey said:

YTA because this is beyond stupid. Some guy is repeatedly stealing money from you and all you can think to do is tell on him to his mommy? You’re a grown ass woman, act like it. You think his mom, 28 years in, just forgot to tell him to not steal from people and respect his partner? What in the actual F.

TyrannasaurusRecked said:

ESH. He's chronologically an adult. Call the police. And take his name off.the account.

NoHorseNoMustache said:

Honestly at this point YTA for continuing to trust a guy who has repeatedly stolen money from your business.

Cool-Cobbler4324 said:

NTA but you should have known better after he took money from you the first time. Dump him and try to get your money back. File police report if you have to.

witsendgame said:

HE IS STEALING FROM YOU AND YOU’VE ALLOWED IT. WTF. Please girl for the love of god have some self respect and dump him and get him out of your accounts yesterday. wtf is his mommy going to do? This is a police matter.