'AITA for making my neighbor wait before I drove her to the hospital while she was in labor?' UPDATED

"AITA because I had my neighbor who was in labor wait for me to get a garbage bag and waterproof cover before I drove her to the hospital?"

My neighbor who’s pregnant went into labor today. I had just gotten home and she needed a ride to the hospital (her husband was coming from work). I told her to wait while I went inside the house to get a trash bag and waterproof cover for her to sit on in case her water broke. She was really pissed (I didn’t realize it until I came back) but I think she didn’t say anything since I was giving her a ride.

It probably took me two-three minutes to get the stuff. Anyway, dropped her off, then went home to pick up my kids and went on with my day. Later, her husband texts me thanking me for the ride, but could I have been more considerate and not have made her wait for me, and then make her sit in a trash bag? Honestly, I was pissed getting that message.

I didn’t feel like potentially having my car messed up from her waters breaking, and I don’t even know if they would have paid for the damages. We aren’t close, but friendly enough. So I replied that I’m sorry if you’re offended, but I just wanted to keep the car clean, and he responded with what’s more important?

So I tell my friends since I’m pissed and some said that it was pretty messed up to care more about my car than a person in labor, but it’s not like she was high-risk or in active labor or something. Her husband and my some of my friends are insisting that I should’ve just driven her ASAP. So...AITA?

What do you think? AITA? This is what top commenters had to say:

milee30 said:

NTA. Labor isn't fun but it's not generally a lightning fast process. If she didn't have 3 minutes to spare (the amount of time it took you to get the plastic liner), she should have called 911. Instead of sniping at you for making her sit on plastic, she and her husband should be thanking you for the ride. If this is how they act, now you know and can choose what favors you want to do for them in the future...

laurpr2 said:

NTA. It obviously wasn't an emergency situation; if it had been, she should have called 911 instead of asking a neighbor to drive her.

Also.....I can't really believe the entitlement of asking a neighbor to drive you and not bringing a towel or something to sit on.

swvagirl said:

NTA- any normal person would do that. I did in my own car when my water broke. Also if she was that worried about it she could have called an ambulance or waited on her husband

heyuiuitsme said:

NTA. My water broke with all three of my children, and each time I put something over the car seat to prevent "leakage". Even when I went to the hospital, they put down one of those pee pads for me to sit on.

NomNom83WasTaken said:

NTA. They don't call it a "bloody show" for nothing (just one potential stain of child birth!)

I've had two kids, even my c-section took 15 min. With my VBAC, once she crowned (after 48 hours in labor) the staff had me scoot down to the end of the bed and they pulled out the hazmat receptacle and put a plastic sheet or whatever under me. Wanna guess how long that took? Yeah, a couple minutes.(Still took several pushes to get her out.)

If a three minute window is the difference here, call an ambulance. It's weird that in this beautiful moment of celebration, they're taking the time to critique you.

He later shared this update:

Here are some answers to questions-

Why didn’t we use her car? Honestly didn’t even occur to me, she never offered, but issue is moot since I had my daughter with me, who needs her car seat and moving that would’ve taken more time.

I originally went into the house for the waterproof mattress pad and a garbage bag to put the mattress pad into afterwards, if it became wet. But in the car, I realized the mattress protector (smaller than twin size) might let the water flow down, so I just put the trash bag on the floor, so the bottom of the mattress pad would drain into it.

So her feet were in the trash bag, but the bag was on the floor flat, but open. Like if you scrunched your pants down and stepped out of them, if that makes sense? This was her third child. I guess she was scared labor can go quickly, since it was her third. She was having contractions but was talking in between and able to walk about. Yes, we are in the US so I saved them a pretty penny by driving her.

If my car had gotten damaged, the cleaning/repair would have posed a big financial strain. We live comfortably and have everything we need, but we don’t have wiggle room for big extras.

We didn’t talk very much on the car ride, as she was busy on her phone making arrangements for picking up her kids from school and dinner and whatnot. Apparently her husband was supposed to be there but the guy who was supposed to be on call to take over for him wasn’t in reach or responding or something.

After the what’s more important? text, I was mad and talking to my friends and didn’t respond for a while because I was sure to send a text in anger. I finally responded with a “ sorry I made her feel like I cared more about my car, it would’ve been really expensive. I didn’t think a few minutes would matter, good luck with the baby.”

Really wanted to add that they shouldn’t ask me for favors anymore, but I was trying to be the bigger person. Didn’t get a response, probably because labor. Did see they had their baby on Facebook (about 5 hours after I dropped her off). This is now the morning after, and I’ve just read through the comments on here. Some of you made a point I hadn’t thought about, which was that the husband was TA.

Now I’m wondering if the wife is even aware. She probably vented to him in labor pains, and he probably lost it because he’s stressed and feeling protective of his wife and took it out on me. Maybe she’s forgotten about it all and would be mortified if she knew. So we’ll see how this goes...but for now the narrative I’m going with is that, until they prove me otherwise. Thank you all for chiming in.