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Wedding guests shares saga of horrifying Paris wedding; 'It was cringiest wedding I've ever been to.' UPDATED 5X

Wedding guests shares saga of horrifying Paris wedding; 'It was cringiest wedding I've ever been to.' UPDATED 5X


When this wedding guests shares her bad experience at a wedding, she tells the internet:

"Horrible tacky wedding from start to finish in 2 weeks"

My husband and I are invited to a wedding in 2 weeks time and it is the most unorganised and weird thing ever, we're a couple of friends attending and had all a call today to have a wtf session as we're all equally confused.

So let me tell you about it. (updates at the end). This wedding is in a week in Paris, we're all from France originally but from different parts of France, and all currently living and working abroad.

So the location selection was a first odd choice as Paris is renown to be really expensive and defo never a first choice from 'provincial' people like us. But whatever.

We then never received official save the dates or invites, but we're just invited into a WhatsApp group to give us the details. Hmm, ok...

We're told the wedding will be at the townhall on the Saturday morning at 9, and then to meet them for lunch on a boat they've rented at 1pm but to find ourselves what to do with ourselves between the wedding and lunch.

Then told that the 'lunch' is actually just snacks and a few drinks, buffet style, and that we're 'encouraged' to bring drinks if we want something other than beers and soft drinks. The boat is then only rented until 8pm and after that, everyone has to go home.

This, is very unheard of at a French wedding. A wedding without a party is not really one.

But whatever, we've then planned with a few others to go to a restaurant together afterwards as the newlyweds will spend their first married evening and night together.

But this doesn't end there. We've then been told (actually only my husband was told on a separate whatsapp group..) that we were also required on the Sunday for the actual wedding ceremony. Ah nice.

But for real, the plan is to have 80 people joining them to a local park in Paris, with no reservation or booking or anything.

Everyone has to bring their own lunch/sandwiches, towels and drinks for a pic-nic. Ah, and they also want us to come well dressed (semi formal) to take pictures together (hmmm, ruining my heels and dress at a pic nic? No thank you)

That doesn't end here. My husband (who's really good friend with the groom) has then been asked this week (yes, 2 weeks away from the wedding) to be the flower boy (cringe. We're all in our mid 30s) and to also prep a speech with the other boys, and to come early to the 'ceremony' to help set up.

At this stage I'm just absolutely flabbergasted. If it were a budget issue, I would 100% understand, however, the bride and groom are two of the most well off people I know, they own multiple houses and never had any financial issues.

So to me, this feels so incredibly tacky, to ask people to fly over and spend a whole weekend with them in one of the most expensive cities in Europe, to not feed them or even provide any sort of entertainment.

I'm also really considering the gift (as they're going back home right after they've asked only cash gift to not have to bother with physical gifts) and I'm honestly thinking of just giving them the bare minimum like 50e from the both of us (husband and I) as traditionally the gift is supposed to pay for your dinner. But here there's none.

My husband and his friends group have tried to talk to him and he just feels that we don't get their 'vision' and that they just want to do something unique. But at what cost?

Regretting having accepted this invite now! But will update to let you know how it's actually gone once done and over.

Update 1:

This is the day before, we have received this afternoon the following news (still on the WhatsApp - BTW which is a community channel, not a group, so we can't even reply):

*They asked in the group if anyone present for the Sunday picnic could bring bluetooth speakers with them.

*They changed 3 times the exact location of the picnic within the parc. But great, we're now close to the public toilets! (/s)

*They gave 3 people's numbers in the group to contact if we had any questions / issues during the day. One of them was not even invited in the group and found out because we jokingly texted him that hopefully he has more answers than the bride and groom.

He was also never asked to do this and had no more clue than any of us what the hell is going on. His only thing is that he's from Paris, so maybe the bride and groom thought he could help with directions?

*We were told for tomorrow to be dressed semi-formal for the civil wedding (fair enough), but to also bring either a change of clothes or accessories to match the theme of the afternoon 'dare to be fun'. Lol.

*We were originally told there would be a shuttle of some kind between the townhall and the boat (as in complete opposite sides of Paris), we then we're told to find our own way there by, and I quote, 'scooter, bike, or uber'

*They sent a video of the 'boat' as a teaser (I won't share it to still keep some kind of privacy) and honestly, it's just an old barge / houseboat that looks absolutely not cool in any way, shape or form.

*They actually confirmed they'll be bringing some snacks on Sunday "for the first to arrive" and so the others were "welcome to bring their own food and drinks, and share if they wish".

Update 2:

This wedding was just as expected, cheap and tacky. Thank god we met there with a few friends we hadn’t seen in a long time, so we were stil able to spend a nice weekend by all staying together. But if we had been there on our own, we would definitely had not stayed over this long.

Now onto the update. See below recap of the 2 days. Before getting into the details of the days, just want to mention that all the different activities were hosted in complete different locations within the city (Paris).

For those who don’t know Paris, it’s a big city and always with a lot of traffic. So going from one side to another can take over an hour. All had to be done in taxi/uber. We prob spent over €150 just in transports.

Day 1: We were to join them to the Townhall at 10am for start of the wedding at 10.30. Arrived there at 9.45, no one there, fine. Grabbed a coffee next door. 10.15, still no sign of the bride and groom. 10.30, they arrive, start to mingle, say hi to everyone, but don’t seem to be rushed in anyway.

We then learn the wedding isn’t starting until 11.30, but they wanted to make sure everyone was there on time…. 11.25, we’re invited to enter the townhall, civil wedding starts. 11.45, we’re done and outside.

We do a few group pictures in front of the townhall, and then are told we’ll be walking a bit further away (10/15mins) to go take pictures in a park nearby.

We arrive to the park. First problem, it had been pissing rain for the past 3 days, rendering the whole park muddy as heck.

All the ladies in heels and stilettos were struggling to stay upright. They then take pictures with all the groups, friends and family. This lasts an hour. In the sun with no shade. No drinks, not even water is provided. Everyone’s sweating away.

1pm, we’re told that we can now all go to the official wedding location, to the “boat”. Originally, we were all told there would be a shuttle organised, but this never happened. All tried to find taxis / ubers to get there, as no public transport would have been an easy option (ie. having to take 3x different buses).

The taxi takes us 45mins to get to the boat. 60 quids. Great (/s). 1.45pm we arrive to the boat, somehow before the bride and groom. The boat is actually a houseboat on the river, and someone’s actual home that they just rent out for the day from time to time.

There’s no decoration or anything and a bunch of personal items all around, as this is someone’s home (whom we’ll call “the captain” for the rest of that story).

As the bride and groom are not there yet, some of the bride’s family start to blow and attach balloons as well as some garlands.

There are also no tables or chairs, just one couch in the ‘living room’. The ‘captain’ is also staying there apparently, so we have that random 50yo dude hanging around. 2pm, the couple arrives on the boat, but things are still being “set up”, so everyone is waiting around, chatting to each other.

Everyone is super thirsty and cannot wait to get a drink.2.15pm, the groom says “everyone come get a drink” and we see that the living room has now a bar set up with 3 bottles of champagne, 5 of prosecco, 1 bottle of white wine, 1 of red, 16 cans of beers.

There was also 1 bottle of rum, a few bottles of coke zero, sparkling water, and fruit juice. To recap, we were 35 people, and this was meant to last us until 9pm. I can confirm that no one got drunk, and we ran out of drinks quite quickly in the afternoon.

As for the “food”, they had pulled up a table and served some ‘amuse-bouche’ / finger food / bites. These were really tasty and quite ‘fancy’ but defo not enough for everyone to feel full.

The afternoon kept going, still no chairs or tables. The older people (like parents of bride/groom) were def getting tired.

Then throughout the afternoon they had organised a couple of games. (although, they did not organise them as they asked a friend of ours to do so).

One of them was a quizz on the bride and groom, one was a sort of enigma/escape game (which was really the highlight of the day - but again organised and lead by a friend of ours), and then they had a friend of them playing guitar/singing for an hour.

All the while the captain was hanging around with everyone. Then came the time of the speeches from the family. This lasted for an hour, again, all standing up looking at everyone talking.

At 6pm, they served sheet cakes. Then nothing really happened until 8/8.30pm.As we were told we were going to be kicked out by 9pm, we had planned with our group of friends to leave by 8/8.30 so that we could still have time to go to a restaurant ; however, around 8pm, the groom said that he was trying to negotiate with the captain to allow us to stay on longer.

They managed to do so until 11.30pm. However, no food at all was served as dinner. They had said “we may order pizzas” but never happened. We got home at 12pm and had to uber eat as we were STARVING

Also, as the captain hadn’t planned to originally have us intil then, some of his own friends showed up at around 10pm and were just hanging around with us. Weird.

Also between 9.30-11.30pm, the groom decided to play a mix set of techno (he mixed himself live) - but like, no one had nothing to drink and we were all exhausted from staying standing up all day, it was just awkward.

Also, random add-on here, but they had asked people to bring a change of clothes for the day, as in semi-formal for the wedding, and then something “fun and daring” for the boat party. Only 1 couple did so, and both dressed up in japanese kimono. The bride and all her family are chinese…..

Day 2:

The 2 days before the wedding were filled with whastapp messages in different groups regarding loads of last minutes changes and add-ons.

For example, the day before, the groom asked in one of the groups if people could bring bluetooth speakers for the ceremony…

Or they sent a picture of themselves in front of 2 trees and said “this is where we’ll meet up”..

All guests (80 people including kids and dogs) were asked to show up at 12, and that the ceremony would start at 1pm.

So husband and I showed up at about 12.10pm at the mentioned location, and no sign of the couple of guests.

Texted friends to learn that some had shown up at 11.30 to see no one and that the park was getting busy, so they decided to take the lead and secure an area. They still had to ask people to leave as there was not once space under tree shade that was free really.

For those who don’t remember, we were also asked to bring our own food and drinks and were ‘encouraged’ to share as well (LOL). It was also meant to be pissing rain with no plan B, but lucky for them, they had a nice enough weather all weekend long (not deserved though.)

Couple arrived at 12.30, in the meantime, some guests helped putting up some decorations on the tree. The bride showed up in a summer dress, the groom in shorts, runners and hawaiian shirt.

They then start prepping the “ceremony area” with some balloons, while they tell people to start eating. There are no chairs, none.

People are meant to sit on the ground to eat, and stand during the ceremony. Friends, husband and I sat together and shared our food and drinks while the prepped kept going in the background.

Then we’re given the go ahead to come stand in a semi-circle around the couple (seating in chairs while the rest of us stands).

My husband was still asked to be the ‘flower girl’ despite his complaints, and they added a flower crown on his head. He was not happy and pretty much was eyerolling the whole time. Too bad for their nice pictures.

One of our friends was the officiant and did a great job with what little info and guidance he was given. But then, speeches started again.

When organising the ceremony, the officiant had reached out to friends and family of both sides to ask if they wanted to make a speech, very little people said they would, so he had asked my husband if he could speak as a favour. Turns out that 5mins before the ceremony, he is told that 8 more people will be speaking afterall.

This lasted an hour and half!!! And honestly, after the speeches from the day before, there is only so much more that can be said about the couple. We get it. She’s smart, he’s fun. She loves yoga, he loves tech.

And if I hear one more joke with “I asked chat GPT to write my speech, no no I’m joking ahaha” I’ll kill someone.

But also, standing an hour and half to listen to boring speeches, while bugs were dropping from the trees on us was just a nightmare. Kids were getting super frustrated as well, poor things.

The officiant even made a joke about how he could see some people getting weak in the knees and so could sit down - “ah but oh no, the chairs haven’t arrived yet”. The face of the couple was absolutely priceless. Loved having them getting a bit of shade.

Then they did the exchange of the rings, and the groom had organised a little ‘prank’ on his wife, which thought would be fun…

He had a friend of his bring the rings in a little pouch, attached to a few helium filled balloons. They then ‘pretended’ to let go of the balloons and they obviously flew away with the wind with the supposed rings.

The bride and most people were kind of horrified. And he let that joke go for a good 5mins, leaving the bride panicking about their rings and him saying it’s just material things and accidents happen.

Then another friend came up and said that was a joke ahah, here are the rings (eyeroll).

Ceremony ended, and we all went back to our blankets to finish our sandwiches, and then they finally came around with the “food” they had promised. We each got 1 cherry, 1 apricot and 1 piece of the sheet cake leftover from the day before. Cool cool.

We then had a train to catch so didn’t stay much longer, but they apparently did another game in the afternoon, and a group pic with a drone and that was it.

From speaking to the family of both bride and groom over the 2 days, we know that they were all pretty disappointed with the weekend as well.

So that was it. Def won’t be participating to their wedding fund there or sending a gift.Still don’t understand what is wrong with them, and our friend group and us have all decided to take a break from the couple for at least a few months as we’re so pissed off by the lack of respect from this joke of a wedding...

Update 3 weeks after:

The first small update is that about 3 weeks after the wedding, my husband received a text saying "Hey bud, just wanted to check if you didn't forget to send us a gift, we can't see your name in the gift list, so just want to make sure we're not forgetting something ;)"

Obviously, we were PISSED. What a rude thing to ask for, clearly "making sure to not miss anything" is an excuse to say they figured out we hadn't participated, but also, asking this 3 weeks after the wedding? The etiquette says that technically you have 6 months to send over the gift. So anyways. Pretty crap.

But right away we checked with our group friend that attended and also didn't give, and all of them received the exact same text... Yikes!

I wanted to reply with all the things that went wrong and tell them to F off, but my husband and the rest of the guys decided to just ignore it for now, and they all replied something in the vein of "Ah sorry, between all the money we spent for and during the wedding and the summer holidays we've been a bit tight for cash, so we haven't sent anything yet."

And still to this day we haven't given anything to this sham of a wedding.

Updated 6 months later:

So that was right after the wedding. And after that, we took a break from the couple and just kinda ignored them.

However, it looks like pretty much all their friends and family decided to do the same, so they started to realise that something was wrong. For example, he had organised in November his 40th birthday but no one that attended the wedding went.

So just before Christmas, the groom reached out to my husband's friend group (him + 2 other guys - the same group we were with at the wedding, including best man), asking for answers / what was going on.

And I think that while everyone kept everything to themselves this whole time, him asking them why everyone was icing them and saying that they really didn't get why this could be happening, well, basically opened the can of worms they probably didn't expect.

So from that quick chat convo, a group call was made, where the 3 guys (inc. my husb), pretty much told him all that went wrong at his wedding, and why it was crap, and why everyone was feeling like this, and how disrespectful the whole thing was.

And the groom was really shocked, but kept pushing back on trying to gaslight the guys into thinking that it wasn't so bad, that they all had a great time etc etc. But the guys were prepared and just told him everything we all felt.

That was a long call, and by the end, the groom was pretty defeated but he apologised for making us feel this way and they all agreed to take some time apart to heal the relationship.

After that, the groom and bride pretty much did the same with their own families (thinking that the friends had exaggerated, and that their families would be more supportive), but oh no.

From what we've heard afterwards, the chats with the families were not good. They both were extremely disappointed in them, the bride's family was even ashamed by the events and had to ring several family members that had attended (and given large checks) and apologise on their behalf. Yikes.

So after all these convos, they finally understood that it was a big deal and that they had massively fucked up. So the groom reached back out to our group of friends, and this time genuinely apologised, and thanked them for still attending and participating and trying to have a good time.

More private convos between them and the rest of the guys have since happened, and the groom has been trying to repair slowly the relationships. But everyone is still keeping them at arm's length and their convos are now very superficial. So that was that for a while...

However...!!! During Christmas, the couple revealed to the friends group that they were pregnant and quite far along (I think she may have been already 2/3 months pregnant at the wedding, but she's very petite and never really drank alcohol, so we didn't notice - maybe the family only was aware) ; and so that the baby will arrive some time by end of Jan.

Cool, we congratulated them, asked a few Qs, yadiyada, and that was it. But then, the first thing that the groom did is send the baby registry list into the group without any context/message etc. (like no "we'd be super grateful if you could participate...."). With all the items on the list being SUPER EXPENSIVE.

Which PISSED OFF the group once again, and one of them bluntly said "F off [groom], are you gonna ask us for money every time we talk? Can't you fg read a room and learn from your mistake??!" - and so once again people got really annoyed at his behaviour, thinking he never learned a thing.

So now, we're not planning to participate in the gift registry, however, once the baby is born we'll send a gift of our own choosing, cause that's not the baby's fault his parents are dheads.

So that's it. Hope you enjoyed that update... and hopefully they'll now be too busy with the baby to bother us.

Sources: Reddit
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