Someecards Logo
Woman asks if she's wrong to smoke in her backyard after neighbors leave nasty note.

Woman asks if she's wrong to smoke in her backyard after neighbors leave nasty note.


Being a good neighbor can be about respecting shared living spaces, avoiding karaoke parties at midnight on a Monday, lending a cup of sugar or protecting packages from getting stolen...

What do you do, though, when your neighbors want you to change your whole lifestyle for their children? So, when a self-proclaimed 'heavy smoker' decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As*hole' about her neighbors, people were quick to help deem a verdict.

AITA (Am I the As*hole) for smoking in my backyard?

I [f27] live in a house with my husband. I'm a heavy smoker but I don't smoke in the house because my husband doesn't like the smell and I don't want him breathing secondhand smoke (he's a non-smoker).

I usually smoke cigs in our backyard. One of our neighbors slid a passive-aggressive note through our letter box last week, saying something along the lines of:


I had no idea which neighbor this was, none of our neighbors had talked to us about this. I decided to ignore the note and continue to smoke in my backyard.

Then 4 days ago, one of our neighbors knocked on our door and complained, and said I shouldn't smoke in my backyard because their kids play in their backyard.

I think my neighbor is being unreasonable. Our backyards are pretty large, and I smoke right in the center of my backyard so the smoke has more space to disperse. I think my neighbor is only complaining because they can see me smoking over our fence. AITA?

Edit to add: I don't have a front yard or a garage. Technically if I smoked on my front porch I'd be breaking the law in our country because there's a children's park less than 20 metres away (it's across the road right in front of my house).

Edit to add: by 'cig' I meant cigarette not cigar. I don't smoke cigars.

Of course, people were eager to weigh in on this neighborhood drama. Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say:

VeryJoyfulHeart59 said:

NTA. It's your yard. You're outside. Definitely NTA. P.S. No judgement, but I hope you quit one day (for your own health).

unwholesome_coxcomb said:

ESH. Smelling other people's cigarette smoke is gross. I wouldn't want me or my kids breathing it in either. Yes, you're technically within your rights to smoke in your yard, but you're lying to yourself if you think it's not bothering or affecting other people in the vicinity.

subsailor1968 said:

YTA (You're the As*hole). Yes, legally you are well within your rights. But your neighbors do deserve to enjoy their yards without the stench of cigarette smoke. And yes, it reeks. It reaches much further than many smokers realize, too.

As a smoker, you don’t notice it. I didn’t when I smoked. But after I quit, I was shocked by how bad it smelled and how far it carried. Again, you are within your rights to smoke on your property. I’m not saying you are doing anything illegal. But you are negatively affecting the lives of your neighbors.

stinson16 said:

NTA as much as I hate to say it. I hate the smell and it makes me nauseated, so I know if I was your neighbor I would probably hate you. But I wouldn’t ask you to stop, you have a right to smoke on your own property. I personally would hate it enough to move though. There’s always a risk that a new neighbor would smoke too, but at least it would probably be fewer than 8 times a day.

So, there you have it!

While the opinions were pretty mixed here, most people agreed that this woman isn't necessarily an as*hole to smoke on her own property, but party of being a considerate neighbor is knowning when your behavior is effecting others. Good luck, everyone!

Sources: Reddit
© Copyright 2023 Someecards, Inc

Featured Content