Woman bans cousin's kids from Halloween party after they 'ruined' it last year. AITA?
"AITA for refusing to let my cousin’s kids come to my Halloween party because they ruined last year’s party?"
So last year, I (21F) hosted a Halloween party at my house. It was a mix of adults and a few kids because my cousin “Jenna” (32F) insisted on bringing her two kids (6M and 9F) despite me saying it was mostly an adult event. I didn’t want to cause drama, so I let her bring them.
Well, it turned into a disaster. The kids were running around all night, knocking things over, messing with the decorations, and even breaking a few things. The 6-year-old threw a tantrum when he didn’t win a game, and the 9-year-old dumped candy all over the floor when she didn’t like her costume.
It was chaos. Several people left early because the vibe was just off with all the kid drama, and I didn’t enjoy the party I had spent weeks planning. This year, I’m planning another Halloween party, and I made it clear that it’s adults-only. I even put it on the invitations that the event is 18+.
Well, Jenna reached out a few days ago and asked if she could bring her kids again, saying they “had so much fun last year” and that they’d be “better this time.” I told her no, explaining that last year was really stressful and this time I want it to be just for adults. Jenna got really upset and said I was “being mean” by excluding her kids and that it wasn’t fair to punish them for being kids.
I explained again that I just wanted a different vibe this year, but she’s still mad, saying I’m being rude and making her feel unwelcome. Now she’s threatening not to come at all unless the kids are invited.
I honestly don’t care, but some of my family thinks I’m being harsh, saying it’s just a Halloween party and that I should've let it go. My husband is 100% on my side, though, and agrees that it’s our party and we should set the rules. So, AITA for telling her she can’t bring her kids after what happened last year?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
RevolutionaryDiet686 said:
NTA. Stop inviting Jenna so this will not be a problem.
According-Kiwi6403 said:
NTA. Your party, your rules. it’s entirely normal to want a party with no kids, especially when you had such a hard time with them prior. your cousin can get a babysitter or stay home.
EnvironmentOk5610 said:
NTA. But mentally get yourself ready for her to just show up with the kids. Since you have family members pressuring you, I think she'll count on you giving in. Maybe make 2 to-go bags with treats and put them by the door so you can hand them over the threshold & say "This is a grown ups party, bye guys, have fun trick or treating!" and just close the door on them.
Terrible_Unit_7931 said:
NTA. It’s an adult party. End of story. None of the activities or events planned are geared towards kids so they are going to be bored anyway. And being bored is probably why they acted out last year.
Your cousin is right that they are just being kids, and as the PARENT of those kids she should freaking know better. She is just too cheap or lazy to get a sitter and wants to get some free babysitting where she can ignore her kids and enjoy the party
Horror-Reveal7618 said:
Did Jenna pay for the stuff her kids ruined? I suspect that, if she had, she wouldn't be so eager to bring them back. NTA.
WatchingTellyNow said:
NTA. You're not punishing them for being kids. You're just organizing a party for adults. If she wants them to have fun, go to a kids' party or a family-friendly party. Oh dear, she hadn't been invited to that kind of party? Then she needs to host it herself! Problem solved!