Woman boycotts sister's wedding over her choice for Best Man. AITA? 'She's FURIOUS.'

"AITA for not attending my sister’s wedding because she made my ex the Best Man?"

So I (29F) was with my ex (31M) for almost 7 years. We broke up two years ago not messy, but not friendly either. It was one of those “we want different lives” situations, and while I’ve mostly moved on, I don’t love being around him.

Here’s the issue: my younger sister (27F) is marrying his best friend. Yes my ex and the groom have been besties since high school. So obviously, he’s the best man. My sister told me early on that he’d be involved, and I told her I was uncomfortable but would still come and just “emotionally prep” for it.

But last month, she asked if I’d give a speech at the rehearsal dinner. I agreed, assuming it would be light and fun. Then she sent me a schedule and guess what? The best man (aka my ex) and I are paired up in the wedding party. For everything. Entrance, walk down the aisle, speeches, seating arrangements. She even joked that it would be “just like old times.”

I told her honestly that this wasn’t okay. I didn’t sign up to feel like a prop in someone else’s nostalgia trip. She said I was being selfish and “making it about me.” So I backed out. Told her I love her and I’ll support her in other ways, but I won’t be at the wedding.

Now she’s furious. Our mom says I’m being immature. A few friends think I should’ve just sucked it up for one day. But I feel like I had boundaries, voiced them, and was ignored. So…AITA for skipping my sister’s wedding because she chose my ex as best man?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Bitter_Animator2514 said:

Aww so your sister makes the problem causes the issue and then acts the innocent victim. NTA. Do what you need to do for your own mental health if you can’t be around them then don’t.

Illustrious_Bird9234 said:

NTA she knew what she was doing.

Tasty_Doughnut_9226 said:

Nta and your sister doesn't care about you. You could just go to the wedding and not be a bridesmaid, but I get not wanting to after your sister would put you in that position.

SmoochNo said:

This has parent trap vibes NTA you were accommodating despite your discomfort. Her agenda couldn’t be more apparent if she tried and that’s both utterly selfish and unkind of her.

Cool-Falcon5093 said:

NTA, she knew what she was doing based on the “like old times” quip. Play crappy games, win crappy prizes. It’s messed up to do that to you after you’d already expressed discomfort, you don’t have to put up with it. Sister is clearly TA.

Long_Assistant8873 said:

If you are maid-of-honor, then YTA. Everything you are describing suggests you are maid of honor and being paired off with the best man is pretty standard for maid of honor. If you are not maid of honor, then ESH. You shouldn't be paired off with the best man, but also you should be adult enough to attend the wedding.

Tiny-Metal3467 said:

Yeah, sis is being a jerk. Everyone knows you don't pair up ex’s at a wedding. She did that sheet on purpose. You tried to stop it, she refused. Nta.