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Woman breaks up with BF because she has 'bad feeling' about his best friend, 'I'm a really chill person.' AITA?

Woman breaks up with BF because she has 'bad feeling' about his best friend, 'I'm a really chill person.' AITA?


"AITA for breaking up with my boyfriend because I had a bad feeling about his best friend and him and decided to avoid DRAMA?"

I (22f) was always a really chill person, I've always gotten along with everyone and I really appreciate my mental peace. I hate unnecessary drama. I've been dating Zack for three years, he's always had his best friend, Mia, who was studying in another country. They always talked via text or video call. That never interested me at all because I also have male friends.

Mia was always disinterested when Zack was by my side on his video calls, and I wasn't interested in her either, to be honest, but Zack wanted us to be friends so I tried. Mia listens to the same music as me, so once three years ago I texted her to try to have a friendly conversation, but she saw the message and never answered me and blocked my number. I thought "what a rude b-h" but I let it go and never talked about it to Zack so I wouldn't make trouble, I just think that maybe she doesn't wants to make friends and I respect that.

Not long ago she returned to the country, now to stay and live here again. Zack asked me if she could stay in our apartment and I said no (I don't feel comfortable with people staying there), Apparently, Zack told her that I was the one who refused to let her be with us because Mia has been doing EVERYTHING to criticize me since that day.

She has criticized my work, my studies, my hair, my clothes, etc. Zack always says that's how Mia is and I should be her friend because she's really funny (ha ha). Many times she tried to make me jealous with comments like "You know that I used to take baths with Zack when we were little kids?'" and she would get upset when I just said "Alright'" at those random comments because tf, Why should I be jealous of that?

She sits on Zack's lap (he doesn't say anything to her about that even if he knows I don't like it), he cuddle with her everytime they have the chance, they whisper to each other and go out together sometimes and I obviously can't help but think that in any moment I will comeback to the apartment and she will be wearing one of his shirt and I don't want to deal with that tbh.

The WORST thing is that Zack really seems to like seeing me jealous, when I tell him something is bothering me, he laughs saying "awww you're jelly" and stuff like that without taking me seriously. It's pretty annoying to know that he likes me to feel that way and Mia has been REALLY irritable lately like if she's competing with me. It feels like they're trying to make a novela with me.

She always tries to make me jealous with stupid things like when she said she knows Zack's favorite sushi and I don't, to which I replied 'then buy sushi for everyone🧍' because I don't care at all. I've told Zack on several occasions that his friend is an idiot and he just says Mia is like that and I should just ignore her comments but honestly? I don't have the energy to deal with that girl and not be@t her up at the end of the month so I told Zack I'm going to move out and it's better to give ourselves some time.

I haven't moved yet so he's been coming to my room to tell me that I'm letting my insecurity speak for me and he doesn't feel anything for Mia, I told him I'm not insecure, I just want to protect my mental peace and avoid DRAMA, he got angry saying I should fight for him and not be so apathetic. He said that if I love him, I would be fighting for him, but I have always had the philosophy that if someone wants to cheat on you, they will do it even if you say no.

I don't know if I'm being too cold about this but I'm not the kind of person who enjoys drama, I was always the 'cold' type of person, I hate it and I know Zack and Mia are enjoying this love triangle. I really care about Zack and we had a great relationship but I care much more about my mental health. AITA?


I haven't moved out yet because we pay rent together, the whole month of the rent is already paid by me because he couldn't come up with the money to pay for this month, but he's supposed to pay for the next month (Guys, I don't have any problem with this, He didn't take advantage of me or anything, something happened and he ran out of money for rent, nothing about this) + I have to wait for my parents to fix my room again so for now I have to leave my things here.

At the beginning of the year the lease was updated so I spent a lot of money on that as well as rent went up by 40% so it's money wasted now. I'm pretty sad about that since my father was the one who helped me pay for my part of the expenses of that apartment.

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

NotyJewel said:

NTA. He's loving all the attention. Get Out. Don't change your mind.

Gljvf said:

Nta. Tell him that when two people actually love each other there is no need to fight for the other person's love. There isn't a reason why you have to deal woth another woman sitting on his lap and flirting with you. She isn't respecting you and he isn't respecting your relationship . Dump his a$s and move on. You will find an amazing person to be with.

Jesicur said:

NTA, he ain't making an effort, why should you?

grissy said:

NTA, dump his ridiculous a$s. There are two possibilities here and they both lead to him not being worth the trouble. He’s not cheating on you yet and he’s just playing embarrassingly juvenile games to "make you jealous." Meanwhile we know nothing about Mia’s motivations in this scenario, maybe she’s toxic enough to get off on breaking up a relationship or maybe she wants this loser for herself for some incomprehensible reason. He’s cheating on you or plans to start soon.

emptynest_nana said:

Why should you fight for him when he is fighting for another woman? He isn't all about you, he is all about the attention and drama. Don't walk, run away from this petty, immature, stupid drama. He is not worth you. NTA.

you-sirrr-name said:

NTA. Have a guy friend over and mimic their behavior. Bet he’ll see how f’d the way he has been acting is then. But I’m petty.

LacieBaskerville13 said:

NTA- you are making a wise move, she does not respect boundaries, he does not put them on her either, they need to mature.

Everyone was on OP's side for this one. What's your advice for these exes?

Sources: Reddit
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