Woman chooses similar baby name to pregnant stepsister, 'she picked the name first.' AITA?
"AITA for choosing a name my stepsister had in mind for my daughter?"
So, I (25f) have been married to my husband for 3 years, I have known him since high school. I recently just had a baby. And we decided not to tell anyone the name till the baby was born.
My stepsister was also pregnant. We both had very similar names in mind. I liked Mary-Kay. My stepsister liked the names Mary-Grace. My stepsister did choose the name first, but our names weren’t identical. And she still insisted I didn’t use Mary-Kay still.
We did anyways and when I announced it, my stepsister called us and had a cow. She said we disrespected her knowing she picked the name first and now she has to choose a new baby name on such short notice. We reminded her that the names aren’t identical and there is no reason to change, but she just got upset and hung up.
Stepmom soon called us later backing up my sister saying how childish we acted keeping it a secret so we could get our way, and she wanted to use that name after her grandmother's death. They are all very upset with us. AITA?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
ince_lass said:
Leaning towards YTA. You knew it was her chosen name and you said she was using the name to honor her late Grandmother. She certainly doesn't own the name but if she'd made it known she had chosen the name for sentimental/family reason...then you were very sly. You kept your baby name a secret on purpose cos you knew what you were doing was wrong.
BonusMomSays said:
People, who keep the names selected secret until the child is born, typically do so for fear of someone else using it. While the name you chose is not exactly the same as the one your step-sister told you she selected for her child, it is so damn close that it is nearly identical. While no one owns a name and you can name your baby anything you want, you are the reason people keep the chosen names secret. YTA.
shorty20-22 said:
YTA. It is very hidden but not only did your stepsister pick the name first it sounds like it's after a dead grandmother so she had particular reasons to want that name, it's not just a name she liked.
Yes she doesn't own the name & the names are slightly different (but similar enough to not want 2 cousins to both have those names) but couldn't you have picked something else to be kind?
PracticalPrimrose said:
YTA. This is why people don’t tell people names. She wanted to use it to honor her grandmother, and you stole that opportunity by picking something that was essentially the same.
BlueGreen_1956 said:
YTA. I would bet you hid the name until the birth BECAUSE you knew it was going to cause trouble. That's just nasty.
Due_Emergency4031 said:
YTA and you know it. It would be different if she wasnt pregnant as well. But you had to one up her. Yikes.