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Woman commands sister to pay for her childcare since she wants a childfree wedding.

Woman commands sister to pay for her childcare since she wants a childfree wedding.


Weddings are 10/10 solid parties (usually). Sometimes you don't want a child at a cool party, though. Child-free weddings are common but inconvenient for parents who have to find childcare.

On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I The A**hole Subreddit, one woman asks if she's wrong to demand her sister pay for her childcare if her son isn't allowed to attend her wedding.

She writes:

My (f25) sister's wedding (F28) is in two months. I was invited as a regular guest, not a bridesmaid or MOH since we live a state apart. She recently sent out inventions.

There's a certain level of involvement and time that goes into being part of a bridal party, which I understand. I want to be there for my sister, and I'd like to see her marry.

But the problem is I'm a single mom. My son is six, and I need to be home watching him when he's not at school. So being out for hours isn't in the cards for me right now. My sister's wedding is child-free.

Since it's taking place in her state, I'd need to commute and probably leave my house for two full days. I can't have family watch my son since they'll all be at the wedding. And I don't have friends who will babysit for two days.

I contacted my sister and asked if she'd be willing to let my son come to the wedding with me, and explained he couldn't be left alone so young and that I didn't have anyone to watch him. She told me her 'no children' policy was strict, and she wouldn't make exceptions.

I explained my situation again and said I'd need some form of child care or to bring him with me. I then asked her if she would pay me to hire a nanny or babysitter to watch him.

She got offended and said, 'Children and weddings are both parts of life,' I need to 'just figure it out. It's my kid, my problem.'

Sure, that's true, but also her wedding, her making it a problem by not allowing me to bring my kid. I told her she could either pay for my child care or I wouldn't attend her wedding.

All she did was call me 'ridiculous' and 'entitled.' She said she shouldn't have to pay for my child and that part of being an adult is knowing how to take care of that.

I think that's ridiculous. Money is tight. Child care is expensive. I can't magically afford someone to watch my 6-year-old, and most people would just let me bring him to the wedding.

My sister says she's not paying for child care, and 'I guess you're not going to the wedding then.' My whole family is mad at me for 'not being there for my sister.' AITA?

The internet has deliberated thourghly on the subject matter.

flatgreysky says:

YTA (You're the A**hole). I understand where you’re coming from, but you went wrong about this. 'I’m sorry, but it’s not within my budget to travel so far and arrange to pay for child care when I arrive. I send my best.' Full stop.

Don’t ask for handouts from a stressed-out bride. Is that what people do? Good lord. If she’s gracious, she or the family will offer a solution. But you don’t ask for that. That’s where the entitlement came from. In the end, the kid is your responsibility, no one else’s.

idontcare8587 says:

YTA. It's no one else's responsibility to pay for your childcare. Completely unreasonable ask.

Veblen1 says:

YTA. I've never heard of a bride/groom being expected to pay for a guest's childcare. What nonsense.

OP, lobbying your sister for free child-care isn't the right person to talk to. You gotta lobby the government for that!

Sources: Reddit
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