Woman decides to leave BF after confession; 'The fact that he confessed in public too...I was humiliated.' UPDATED

"I'm leaving my boyfriend after he drunkenly confessed something to me last night."

My boyfriend and I (both 29) have been together for 2 years now. Before that, we were both married and got cheated on by our spouses.

We were introduced to each other through mutual friends and thought we would get along since we went through the same thing.

I have told everyone us meeting that night was the greatest blessing because he came into my life at a very dark point in my life. In the past two years, we moved to a new town, started new jobs, and bought a house. I travel for work and he works 90 hours a week so we both have no desire to have kids.

I have a brother (31M) who has been with a woman since 2020. They were supposed to get married, but called it off in 2022. Since then, they have been on/off together and really don't have a great relationship.

That was until November when his girlfriend found out she was pregnant and they decided to get serious. They bought a house and have been going to couple's therapy. Their relationship seems to be working out now since they had their baby.

They decided to host a 4th of July party at their house. I attended with my boyfriend. I spent most of the night helping with cooking and helping my brother's girlfriend set up and watching my niece.

Like every 4th of July party, there's people getting way too drunk and starting to act up. Once mostly everyone had left, my boyfriend and me, brother and his girlfriend, and a couple friends were sitting by the fire and having a few drinks.

My boyfriend had a few too many drinks and was starting to act drunk. He started telling random stories and after a few random stories, he says "[brother's GF's name] remember when we used to hook up last year?"

My brother's GF looks at him in shock then starts apologizing to me. I just sat there in silence before leaving. Immediately after, I got texts from his GF, my bf, and brother all trying to fix things and saying he didn't mean to tell me.

His GF texts me the story and says that they hooked up for a couple months while I was working in another state and she was broken up with my brother.

I haven't replied to anyone's texts, just spent the morning packing all my stuff from the house and leaving with my car and the truck I bought for him. I already feel so much happier knowing what he did to me and now that he's gone.

Before we give you OP's updates, let's take a look at some top responses:

eslt7 writes:

I'm sorry, that's so fd. Especially that even your brother didn't tell you. Have you talked to anyone since?

art87 writes:

I would be going NC with my brother. We would have nothing to speak about going forward.

Just knowing my bf cheated on me with your gf and everyone smiling in my face afterwards while I am the only one who doesn’t know, I just couldn’t come back from it.

opath8i writes:

He cheated on you with your brother's girl friend and they all knew and no one said anything. Wtf. Why is your brother still with her and why didn't he tell you. And did your boyfriend apologize for cheating or just apologize for telling you because it seems like he only sorry for letting it slip. F them all. I would cut contact with all of them.

Edit to add are they sure the baby is your brothers?

vacant9 writes:

I wondered that same thing. Assuming the baby is her brother’s and not her BF’s, if she goes NC with everyone, she never sees her niece again. These three people conspired to keep OP in the dark about something huge, hoping she would never find out, and now that the secret is out, her life is affected in so many ways.

And to think she has spent the last year hanging out making memories with them, all while the three of them were lying to her and keeping a huge secret from her. The betrayal is so big and so far-reaching. Poor OP. My heart hurts for her.

worthap0 writes:

I’m so sorry you are going through this. No matter what any of them say it won’t change the fact that they all betrayed you. Only one I would hear out is your brother, did he already know or did he find out the same as you and heard them out?

Don’t forgive your bf- he has been cheated on before he knows how it feels. And he chose to hurt you like that. It is unforgivable Either sell the house and split the money, or have him buy you out and move on. You will find someone that deserves you.

spenscif writes:

That is such a deep level of betrayal to me - and by so many people you should never have to question. Imagining the four of you being at dinner and everyone knowing they cheated (and for months) and essentially winking at each other like they have a million little inside fg jokes you were on the outside of.

And all the millions of tiny lies of omission that they had to tell to keep you unknowing. Wow that's an unfathomable level of betrayal. It's never a single big lie but literally millions of ongoing lies.

That may be my worst nightmare. I am incredibly sorry you're going through this. As horrible as it feels now I'm happy you're secure in your choice to leave all those immoral disloyal assholes behind.

And that now you can meet someone worthy of you sooner now. Try not to let it change who you are (too much) or make you doubt your ability to make sound choices. This says nothing about you and tells you everything you need to know about them.

Update:

Wow, looking at my original post, I never expected it to blow up like it did. I honestly forgot I made this post until my own story came up on my TikTok LOL.

So, here’s my update. It took me a bit, but I have gone 100% no contact with my entire family and haven’t heard from my ex-boyfriend since July.

I sold our old house, left my job, sold his truck, and bought a house in my favorite town closer to my best friends. It was a much needed step to heal and move on with life. I found a great job there and grew closer to all my friends, especially my college best friend, Trey.

I found myself venting to him all the time and him always being there if I needed someone. He’s been my rock since the move and I’m so extremely grateful for him. I finally made the move I think we’ve both been scared to make and we are telling our friends tomorrow that we’re officially dating. We’re going on our first triple date as a friend group tomorrow too :)

My life is so beautiful now that all the toxic people are gone and I’m in my happy place. Consider this my post reminding you that it’s okay to start over. I bet you’ll bloom all over again and your life will be 10x better :)

Relevant Comments

Commenter 1: Congrats!! Any idea what the other people are up to?

OOP: Nope. I don’t keep up with them anymore and have everyone blocked.

Commenter 2: I was just thinking about you yesterday! I'm so happy to hear you cut those people out of your life and you're doing so well!