Woman decides to expose best friend's affair with coworker, 'something was terribly wrong.' AITA?
"AITA for exposing my best friend's secret affair?"
I (30F) have been best friends with Sarah (29F) since childhood. We've always been there for each other through thick and thin. However, recently I found out something that shook me to the core.
Sarah has been in a committed relationship with her fiancé, John (32M), for the past five years. They were planning their dream wedding, and everything seemed perfect on the surface. But one day, while scrolling through social media, I stumbled upon a picture that made my blood run cold.
It was a photo of Sarah cozying up to a man who was definitely not John. Shocked and confused, I tried to brush it off as a misunderstanding. However, over the next few weeks, I noticed Sarah becoming increasingly secretive and distant. I couldn't shake off the feeling that something was terribly wrong. So, I decided to do some digging. What I uncovered left me torn between loyalty to my best friend and doing what I felt was right.
I discovered that Sarah was indeed having an affair with her co-worker, Mark (30M). They had been seeing each other for almost a year, behind John's back. I was devastated and felt like I was living in a soap opera.
My moral compass was spinning. On one hand, I wanted to confront Sarah and make her see the gravity of her actions. On the other hand, I didn't want to betray her trust or jeopardize our friendship.
After much deliberation, I decided to confront Sarah. The conversation was emotional and intense. She begged me not to tell John, citing various reasons and promising to end the affair herself. But I couldn't shake off the guilt of keeping such a huge secret from John, who was completely unaware of Sarah's betrayal. I struggled with my decision for days until I finally made a choice.
I anonymously messaged John with the evidence I had gathered. The fallout was catastrophic. Sarah's engagement was called off, and our friendship was shattered. She felt betrayed and blamed me for everything. Now, I'm left questioning whether I did the right thing. Was it my place to expose Sarah's affair, or should I have stayed out of it and let her deal with the consequences herself? AITA?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Famous-Upstairs998 said:
You did the right thing. She's the one who had the affair. She ruined her life. All you did was stop more victimization of her fiance. NTA.
Majestic-Post-1684 said:
Blamed you for everything? Did you force her to be a liar & a cheater? It’s ironic she felt betrayed after she betrayed her ex-fiancé for over a year. Obviously NTA.
doofardhwi said:
NTA- you gave her time and confronted her but all she said was that she would end the affair? it’s honestly her fault for cheating so she can’t blame you for being the one to tell.
boredathome1962 said:
NTA. She blamed you because she got caught cheating. You know, don't want to get caught? don't cheat...As for your question, you protected the innocent party, John needed to know before the wedding, you did the right thing.
2Whom_it_May_Concern said:
NTA. You did the right thing. John deserved to know before he married a cheater. Sarah knew the risks and cheated anyway. For an entire year! That's 20% of her and John's relationship.
Fuzzy-Bike-8813 said:
NTA. Looks like John choose the wrong friend. Honestly who needs "friends" like her anyways.
ersariagbahs said:
NTA. Your loyalty should be towards the truth and not someone who is deceiving their partner. It may have been a tough decision, but ultimately you did the right thing by exposing her affair instead of enabling it to continue.
lmnop129 said:
NTA, you are a good women. You saved a man's life.