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Woman refuses parents' attempts to make her forgive sister for stealing her fiancé.

Woman refuses parents' attempts to make her forgive sister for stealing her fiancé.


Blood is thicker than water is a saying people use. On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A**hole Subreddit, a woman puts that saying to the test.

AITA for turning down a request to attend my sister's daughter's birthday and make her a cake?

OP, your sister kind of sucks.

I went no contact with my sister eight years ago after learning she was having an affair with the guy I was engaged to at the time. It was not the first time something similar had happened. When we were teens (yes, I know, I know we were teens), there was a guy I liked, and we'd been flirting and building up to something.

I would confide in her about it. Then she went and slept with him and told me she wanted to 'test him out' for me. At the time, I let it go. We were sisters. I wasn't dating the guy. But it stung her to do that to me and be so casual about it. But we were both young.

Your sister didn't learn.

I met my ex when I was 20; we started dating when I was 22, and he proposed to me after 18 months. We had been engaged for a year and had begun planning the wedding when I learned they had been together for five months—not just having sex but going out on dates, sneaking around to spend time with each other, and sleeping in my bed.

Forgiveness takes time.

She even brought him into my childhood bedroom and had sex with him on my childhood bed while our parents were out of town. She had no remorse until I found out. Then she broke down and told me how sorry she was, how she hadn't realized how much it would hurt me, and that she needed me to forgive her. I told her I hated her and wanted nothing more to do with her.

She begged and pleaded. She even went as far as showing up at my job to try and make me forgive her. Even after she moved him in with her (yes, I broke up with him, too) and he proposed to her, she kept trying. I told her she might be forgiven when she was dead but not to hold her breath on that.

No means no.

I have no relationship with her anymore and am not open to one.

She has two/three kids with him now. Not sure if they are still together. But her oldest turned six recently, and my parents had mentioned how she wanted to know me and how she'd spoken to my sister, and everyone would love it if I went to her birthday party, her six-year-old included. I said no.

She keeps fighting.

My parents said they'd even pay me to make her a birthday cake (since I do that as a side gig). Again I said no. They told me how she wanted to know me and that my sister would let them facilitate it. I said I was not interested. My sister reached out to me on Messenger and begged me to come.

She said her daughter knew all about me and wanted to meet and have her aunt in her life. I ignored my sister. My parents were furious when the party came and went, and I stuck to my word. They told me I should have gone and tried to have a relationship with her.


lostalldoubt86 says:

NTA (Not the A**hole)- Your parents don’t get to decide how long it takes you to forgive your sister. What was your parents' reaction when they found out your sister literally stole the man you were going to marry?

I think it’s particularly crappy that your family thinks the child she had with an affair partner is going to be the bait to get you to forgive her.

loticanautica says:

Girl, you are NTA. I don’t blame you whatsoever and I’m sorry this happened. :( AND TWICE! Like how and why if my sister did that I’d be worse than you. She is not a sister to you.

Btw f*ck your parents for trying to manipulate you into going. And if you make her a cake you should write happy birthday home wrecker and put snails in it. I hope things are going well for you.

user174926 says:


If your parents want an aunt for the kid, they can make one 🤷🏻‍♂️

The full phrase is the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb which means the opposite of blood is thicker than water.

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